What is wrong with people asking the question, “What is wrong with people?”
What is wrong with hundreds of people answering that question, including me?
Yet when people ask “What is wrong with me?” in therapy, I answer very differently, with “Is that a helpful question?”
What is wrong with people answering the question “What is wrong with me?” with “Nothing!”
What is wrong with people making a distinction between people as a species and individuals? What is wrong with people letting go of shame (the belief that something is wrong with them) in order to heal?
What is wrong with people sharing their images with other people?
One of my signature moves is sharing the Daily Bitch calendar:
Unfortunately, because of the COVID-19 pandemic, we all need to practice this signature move of pushing everyone away. At least, however, we don’t have to wonder why we’re alone.
Another one of my signature moves is taking photos of what moves me.
Harley and Oscar have very different signature moves (as you can see in this post).
That’s a sign I saw yesterday at Designer’s Circus in Boston. At Designer’s Circus, I found Therapy and Joy.
That’s Joy, who was one of the many people at Designer’s Circus who heard that I was there to shop for a dress for my December 27 City Hall Wedding and who wanted to be involved in the process.
That’s Kathleen, one of the owners of Designer’s Circus, who helped me find two great dresses. Spending time with her and the other wonderful people I met at Designer’s Circus was definitely therapy for me.
says, to me, that group therapy is a very effective way to deal with trauma and loss.
Spoiler Alert! I am not doing my usual thing of linking to the Wikipedia entry about Avengers: Endgame, because that has countless alert spoilers in it.
Spoiler Alert! I wonder if I’m reducing my readership for this blog post by repeating the words “Spoiler Alert”?
Spoiler Alert! Last night I couldn’t sleep and started writing a song called “Spoiler Alert.”
Spoiler Alert! Here are the lyrics I’ve written so far:
Even though I’m up for anything these days, sometimes I get exhausted, especially on Thursdays, when I
work from 10 to 9,
facilitate two therapy groups,
orient new people for my groups,
see several people for individual therapy,
go to a meeting of social workers,
have about 20 minutes for lunch,
try to decide whether to look at or avoid the news,
practice my latest song, and
practice self-care.
In one of those therapy groups, a person exhausted by a major and unexpected loss shared that she practices self care by taking breaks, even if it’s a break for a moment. I wasn’t too exhausted to hear that she had learned that skill in my groups.
I was so exhausted by the end of the day that I added a new emotion to the emotions chart on my door:
Here and now, I’m exhausted by the possibility that somebody might tell me that “exhausted” is not really an emotion.
Here and now, I’m NOT too exhausted to share my other photos from yesterday.
I hope you’re not too exhausted to share what exhausts you and what energizes you, in a comment below.
Last night, my boyfriend Michael and I were experiencing cognitive distortions when we were both making overgeneralizations about human beings. Our cognitive distortions have increased since the last U.S. Presidential election as we both try to make sense of the human behavior described in the media, by cognitively debating and trying to understand what people are really like and why they say what they say and do what they do.
Do you see any cognitive distortions in this part of our discussion last night?
Michael: I think people who say “I believe in him” or “I believe in that” know, on some level, that those things are not true.
Me: Michael, this is the same disagreement we constantly have. I think that a lot of people really believe what they say. How do you know what they really believe? That’s overgeneralization and mind reading.
Michael: How do YOU know what they really believe?
Me: I don’t really know, but I’ve encountered so many people in individual and group therapy who seem to really believe what they say they believe.
Michael: And I’ve encountered thousands of people through my work in the food industry.
Me: THOUSANDS?
Michael: Let me tell you a story that sums up my experience of people. There was this woman I used to work with. One day, somebody asked her if she believed in ghosts. She said, “No.” And then she added, “But I’ve seen one.”
Me (laughing): I’m putting that in tomorrow’s blog.
Do you see any cognitive distortions in today’s photos?
I just searched YouTube for “cognitive distortions” to see if any musical group already has that name. This is what I found:
Feel free to express your cognitions and feelings about Cognitive Distortions, below.
Thanks and appreciation to all who helped me express the cognitive distortions in today’s post and — of course! — thanks and appreciation to YOU.
If you hang on until the end of this blog post, you’ll see the photo that inspired today’s post title.
I like the title “Hanging on for dear life” because I’ve been hanging on for almost sixty-six years and life is very dear to me. I also like that title, here and now, because life can sometimes seem precarious, especially with global warming reports, the current political situation, the stresses inherent during the holiday (and exam) season, interpersonal conflicts, and a fire alarm going off during a group therapy session.
Hang on, dear readers! Here are all my photos from yesterday:
