Posts Tagged With: group therapy

Day 1755: Insecurity

I can’t get over it:  I’ve apparently never written a post about insecurity in all the one thousand, seven hundred and fifty-five days I’ve been blogging.

I don’t feel insecure about that, but I do feel insecure about hosting get-togethers, which I’ll be doing next weekend at our new home.

Whenever somebody tells me about an insecurity, I assume the insecurity is based on experiences in the past.  However, despite my long-lived insecurity about hosting social events, I’ve never had a bad experience doing that.

At this point, I’ll feel more secure about this blog post if I define my term.

in·se·cu·ri·ty
ˌinsəˈkyo͝orədē
noun
1. uncertainty or anxiety about oneself; lack of confidence.
“she had a deep sense of insecurity”
synonyms: lack of confidence, self-doubt, diffidence, unassertiveness, timidity, uncertainty, nervousness, inhibition
2. the state of being open to danger or threat; lack of protection.
“growing job insecurity”
synonyms: unstable, rickety, rocky, wobbly, shaky, unsteady, precarious

When I first started doing group therapy, I was uncertain, anxious, unconfident, self-doubting, diffident, unassertive, timid, uncertain, nervous, and inhibited, and I felt unstable, rickety, rocky, wobbly, shaky, unsteady, precarious, and insecure. These days, when I am facilitating my groups, I securely observe that people often feel better about their insecurities when they realize they’re not alone.  Do any of my readers share my insecurity about hosting social events? If so, what helps relieve the insecurity?

 

When I first started sharing photos in this blog, I had insecurity about that. Not any more.

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That photo of Harley — who has a lot of insecurities — reminds me that I intended to write about wrinkles today.  There’s a lot of insecurity, especially in women, about wrinkles.

I see many songs about insecurity on YouTube. Here‘s one of them:

 

Secure thanks to all who helped me create this post about insecurity and — of course! — to you.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Day 1754: I can’t get over it

I can’t get over how many people I see in group and individual therapy who’ve been sexually, physically, and emotionally abused.

One of those people recently borrowed and returned this book I have in my office:

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In both of  my therapy groups yesterday, everybody shared thoughts and feelings about personal experiences of abuse.

I can’t get over people’s resilience, too.

I also can’t get over how “Get over it!” never helps people get over anything.

 

I can’t get over taking and sharing photos on this blog.

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I can’t get over how the sink at work is always clogged.

I can’t get over how many people read this blog.

I can’t get over my gratitude for you!

 

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

Day 1753: When we die

When I die, I won’t be checking the news any more.    Because I’m still alive, I recently read this news story stating “Some studies suggest our minds still work after we die.  Meaning, when we die…we know we are dead.”

I know that’s a coincidence, because I recently had a  we-died-laughing conversation about when we die. I said:

  1. My body could be stuffed and placed in my usual chair in the group room and
  2. The groups would probably still do great work with a facilitator who doesn’t say anything.

I know I haven’t died, yet, because I’m still taking pictures with my iPhone.

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Isn’t that flounder dish to die for?  I’m not trying to impress you, but I have the perfect song for today’s blog post.

 

I’m dying for some comments, here and now.

Undying thanks to all who helped me create today’s blog post and — of course! — to all my living readers.

 

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 41 Comments

Day 1746: Appropriate

Is it appropriate for me to tell you that I’ve never written a blog post with the word “appropriate” in the title before? It is appropriate to reveal the inspiration for today’s title?

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That’s a sign for a parking lot where I work. I don’t park there. Does that mean I’m not appropriate?

When I read the news these days, I see a lot of inappropriate behavior, which contributes to my  sense of chaos. Is it appropriate to ask whether we can agree on what behaviors are appropriate?

Are these photos appropriate?

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Is it appropriate to discuss stool/poop in mixed company? Is it appropriate to use the term “mixed company”?  Was it appropriate for Michael and I to both wear that cat head at Target and then not buy it? Is it appropriate for me to share what I write during group therapy sessions about topics like self esteem? Is it appropriate for me to reveal that one of the group members talked about “dumb asses” before I wrote down some thoughts about self esteem?

Is it appropriate for me to bombard my readers with so many questions?

Is it appropriate for me to use this photo to introduce today’s music?

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Please leave an appropriate comment below.

Can we agree that gratitude is an appropriate way to end all of my daily blog posts?

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Day 1741: I have the right to ________

How would you complete the sentence in today’s title?

I have the right to tell you about The Personal Bill of Rights, from The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne.

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I have the right to encourage people to use their personal rights  in my therapy groups.

I have the right to take photos and to share them here.

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I have the right to get out and go to musicals (like Evita at the North Shore Music Theater,  where I’ve seen dozens of musicals since I was a little kid).

I have the right to share YouTube videos of different productions of Evita (here,  here, and here).

I have the right to request comments for my blog.

You have the right to remain silent or to comment, below.

I have the right to express my gratitude for all who help me create these posts and — of course! — for you.

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

Day 1726: Different perspectives

Because I’m a group therapist, I often encounter different people expressing  different perspectives. For example, earlier this week I invited people to practice mindfulness by focusing on a vase of flowers in the group room.  After the mindfulness exercise,  we heard these different perspectives:

  • “I love flowers.”
  • “I’m not a flower person.”
  • “Flowers help me relax.”
  • I wondered if those flowers are  fake.”
  • “Flowers remind me of funerals.”
  • “I need to remember to stop and smell the flowers.”

Yesterday, I thought about different perspectives as I was taking this photo:

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All the different perspectives in that photo may not be clear, but several people are taking pictures there and each of us has a different perspective on Boston’s Fenway Park.  I wish I could show you all those different perspectives.

Lately, many of the different perspectives I encounter include  expressions of anxiety, depression, stress, uncertainty, worry, concerns for others, and concern for self.  Different people also express and learn different perspectives on how to feel better and take the next right step. Sometimes, I suggest trying on this different perspective:

It’s safer than it feels.

Every person who is reading this post has a different perspective and my perspective is that I would love to know all those  different perspectives.

There are different perspectives about “Different Perspectives” on YouTube, but this is the most popular one:

 

Thanks to all the different perspectives that help me create different blog posts and thanks to you — of course! — for all your different perspectives.

 

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Day 1717: Worries, wishes, and prayers

I wish to tell you about yesterday’s therapy group, where people shared wishes and prayers as well as worries.

While I may wish my handwriting were better, I’ll do the best I can sharing what I wrote yesterday in that group.

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I had more worries and wishes, but those are the ones I wished to capture with my camera.

Now I wish to share my other photos from yesterday. Do you see any wishes, prayers, or worries here?

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Michael and I were worried about that bird last night, which was standing in the road.  It seemed sick and we wished to help. We tried to get it off the road, but it kept walking back into the street.  We did our best, walked away, and prayed and wished that bird would be okay. We worried that sometimes your wishes and prayers come true, but other times they don’t, which is for the birds.

If you wish, please share your worries, wishes, and/or prayers.

I now wish to share this song:

 

Don’t worry, I won’t forget to thank all those who helped me create today’s post and you — of course! — who I wish and pray will have a good day.

 

 

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Day 1712: Legacies

Earlier this week, I witnessed a discussion about legacies in a therapy group.  People spoke about the legacies left them by their families and also the legacies they hope to leave behind.

I’ve established a legacy here of defining my terms, so …

LEGACY
[leg-uh-see]
noun, plural legacies.
1. Law. a gift of property, especially personal property, as money, by will; a bequest.
2. anything handed down from the past, as from an ancestor or predecessor:
“the legacy of ancient Rome.”
3. an applicant to or student at a school that was attended by his or her parent.
4. Obsolete. the office, function, or commission of a legate.
adjective
5. of or relating to old or outdated computer hardware, software, or data that, while still functional, does not work well with up-to-date systems.

The discussion of legacies in the group focused on the second definition (although I’m now thinking about old or outdated computer hardware, software, or data, which seems to be an ongoing legacy of the information revolution).

Here’s what I wrote about legacies in the group:

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Just to be clear, I’m not hoping to leave behind the legacy of a broken heart.   That drawing illustrates something else the group discussed: when something is broken, there can be great strength at the places of mending and healing.  Ernest Hemingway, who left behind a legacy of great literature, said it this way:

The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places.

Actually,  Hemingway’s legacy in A Farewell to Arms was in the context of this:

“If people bring so much courage to this world the world has to kill them to break them, so of course it kills them. The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.”

I’m hoping one of my legacies to my son will be this view from our new home:

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… but who knows what that legacy will look like by the time I’m gone.

I’ve tried to leave behind a legacy of great music in this blog. Here‘s The Legacy Trio playing Pat Metheny’s “Question and Answer.”

What do you think about the legacies in the post?  You could leave a comment behind, below.

I also try to leave a legacy of gratitude.  Thanks to all who helped me create today’s blog and — of course! — to you and all your legacies.

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Day 1710: Rage

Yesterday, in a therapy group, people spoke about rage without rage but with sadness.  Somebody had witnessed a shooting on the way to group. Another person spoke about rage dividing siblings.  The group discussed the destructive forces of rage in families and also on the world stage.

Despite the focus on rage, the members ended the group with hope and gratitude for human resilience.

What are your thoughts about rage?  How does rage affect you?

I’m not sure what images to share today, since I took no photos yesterday. I shall look through my recent pictures for something that seems relevant.

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There will be no miracles here, regarding rage.  We will continue to encounter rage, even though we may wish it away. However,  we can still do our best to connect, understand, learn, and grow.  And maybe, just maybe …

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everything is going to be alright.

Check out this “Rage” that’s raging on  YouTube.

 

Thanks to Guy Collins Animation, to the National Galleries of Scotland, to people who heal in groups, and — of course! — to you, for reading this “Rage” post today.

 

 

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Day 1690: What makes life worth living?

Yesterday, in a therapy group, somebody asked this question:

Using one word, what makes life worth living?

Somebody replied, “Love.”  Somebody said, “Learning.”  I said, “Everything,” which I thought might be cheating, but people didn’t think so. We noticed that  nobody said “Money.”

Then, last night, after many hours of shopping and trekking all over the South Shore of Boston in preparation for my trip to Scotland on Saturday, I discovered that my wallet was missing.  Suddenly, life seemed very difficult (although still worth living).  Michael suggested we retrace our steps and that I also call the Target Store in Braintree, which was about to close in fifteen minutes. I was almost positive that my wallet was not at Target, but I called anyway.

Here’s the phone conversation:

Me: I was at your store earlier tonight and I’m missing my wallet. I was wondering if anybody turned it in.

Customer Service Representative:  What does it look like?

Me:  It’s mostly  red and black. It’s made from recycled billboards.

Customer Service Representative:  Is there a name on cards?

Me:   Ann Koplow.

Customer Service Representative:  Yes.  It’s here.

I think the word “Yes” can make life worth living. Or, at least, less of a hassle.

Let’s see if my photos from yesterday include anything that makes life worth living.

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Just so you know, I took all of yesterday’s photos before I knew that my wallet had been lost or found.

Here’s what comes up on YouTube, over and over again, in response to “What Makes Life Worth Living.”

I am ending this post with one word: “Thanks.”

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 47 Comments

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