Day 2489: Good as hell

I’m feeling  good as hell today, because I’m facing a day that is full as hell of

• group therapy,
• individual therapy,
• people I love, and
• the first event of my 45th college reunion.

Yesterday, in a therapy group that was good as hell, our new good-as-hell social work intern revealed that she loves the music of Lizzo.

I see that Lizzo is in the new movie Hustlers, which is  popular as hell.

Here‘s “Good as Hell” by Lizzo:

I love this good-as-hell comment about that video:

Chazz1 week ago

I gotta start loving myself, I don’t wanna let Lizzo down

.

We gotta start loving ourselves; we don’t wanna let Lizzo down.

Here are other good-as-hell photos from yesterday:

Oscar was good as hell last night at the Northeastern Society for Group Psychotherapy board meeting.

Here are some good-as-hell revelations I’ve had this week:

1. When you’re good as hell, some people (who probably feel bad as hell about themselves) might resent you for that, and
2. You can reduce the power of people who make you feel bad as hell by imagining them as small and far-away-as-hell from you.

I’m looking forward to some good as hell comments and here’s some good as hell gratitude from me to YOU!

Day 2488: Being here, being there

“Being here, being there” is something I wrote on the white-board wall while human beings were being here and there during a Coping and Healing group yesterday.

Being human beings, their thoughts went here and there to regrets, the past, the present, the future, work, other people’s reactions, progress, tears, fears, emotions, death, showing up, reservations, reasons, sleeping, bravery, speaking, not speaking, triggers, early, late, and choices, among other here-and-there meanderings.

Being that triggers were affecting all the human beings in the room, “triggers” ended up being the topic of choice, including what helps dealing with them:

Being there, I couldn’t help but notice that “YouTube” made it to the list of what helped those human beings deal with triggers (along with breathing, acceptance, self care, sleep, safe spaces, kindness, music, and other helpful choices).

Being here, I’ll search  for “being here, being there” on YouTube.

Here‘s “I Love Being Here With You” by singer/songwriter Peggy Lee.

I love being here with you, and I loved being there when I took all these other photos:

Being that you’re here, why not leave a comment?

Whether I’m being here or being there, I’m being thankful for all who help me create these posts and — of course! — for YOU, here and now.

 

Day 2487: The difference between good and great

What’s the difference between good and great? Here’s one difference:

A great co-worker and mom showed me that great card yesterday.  Another great co-worker and mom showed me more great pages of The Daily Bitch Calendar:

Last week, when I did my first Coping and Healing group for staff,  I was basically a cucumber with anxiety, but the group was still good.  Today, when I’m doing my fourth group for staff,

• I’m less anxious and
• I’m very happy that the feedback about the group has been so great.

The managers at work think the groups are so great that they want me to do more and also train other good therapists to do them.

Great!

Do you see the difference between good and great in my other photos from yesterday?

Every two weeks, I need to perform an INR test and test my blood because of my heart issues.  The results are always good and usually great!

There are a lot of videos on YouTube titled “The Difference Between Good and Great, including one by The Angry Therapist (which is a great name) and also this one by William King Hollis:

 

Yesterday, on my way home from work, I listened to this great tune by the great Jacob Collier a good many times:

 

How would you define the difference between good and great?

Great thanks to all those who helped me create today’s post and to you — of course! — for being so great.

 

Day 2486: Shocking confession. I’ve made mistakes.

Shocking confession.  I often steal the titles for these posts.

I’m wondering if this shocks my old friend Lawry, a lawyer who specializes in intellectual property and who used to read this blog every day.  Shocking confession: Lawry and I are both attending our 45th college reunion this weekend.

Shocking confession: I keep rewriting the first paragraph of the five-minute “Ted Talk” I’m giving at the reunion, which includes shocking confessions.

Everyone in our class, I’m sure, remembers where you were on November 22, 1963.  I’m different from you.  I have no memories of that day, because I was having heart surgery to get my first cardiac pacemaker. While the world was being traumatized by the assassination of President Kennedy, my family and I were being traumatized by that unexpected surgery, by hospital rules preventing parents from staying with their children, and by medical staff not knowing how to answer the questions of a frightened 10-year-old girl, like “What’s that coffin on the TV screen?” and “What’s this giant thing sticking out of my body?”

It’s shocking how many mistakes people made back then.  Unless I’m mistaken, giving this speech in front of my classmates will be a reparative experience, even if I make mistakes in my presentation.

Shocking confession. I’ve made mistakes every day of my life.  Let’s see if I’ve made mistakes in my other photos from yesterday.

Shocking confession.  I like to make up stories based on what I see around me.  What story might you make up using the photos in this post?  Don’t worry about making mistakes.

Shocking confession. One of the people pictured in today’s blog played the role of Ursula in a local production of “The Little Mermaid.”  Can you guess who that was?  Here is a song Ursula sings about mistakes being made:

Shocking confession. We’re all poor unfortunate souls who make mistakes.  Ariel makes the mistake of giving up her voice in the Disney version of “The Little Mermaid,”  but she recovers it in the end.

Shocking confession.  I’d love to see your comments about this post and I’m grateful to all who helped me create it.

 

Day 2485: Easy for people to get in touch

Yesterday, when I was trying to make it easy for me to get in touch with

• people I love,
• all my feelings,
• confidence,
• hope,
• needs,
• support,
• strength,
• vulnerability,
• adventure,
• being prepared for my speech at my college reunion next week,
• recovery from an inappropriate encounter, and
• the present moment,

… it was easy for me to get in touch with these two notifications on my touch screen:

I don’t know if adding a phone number to Oscar’s Facebook page would make it easy for people to get in touch, since Oscar doesn’t talk on the phone.

It’s easy for people to get in touch with my life because I share so many photos, like these:

It’s easy for me to get in touch with Oscar, Harley,  and all of my photos, for now.

Thanks to YouTube and Spotify, it’s easy for me to get in touch with music I love.

It’s easy for people to get in touch with the comments about that live performance of “Song for Bilbao” by the Pat Metheny Group, including these:

Noemi Zaffanella
2 years ago (edited)
I heard Pat Metheny and Lyle Mays since I was 6. I remember my mum when she told me that pat’s music is ever green. It’s true, I’m 19 now and I listen pat metheny every day for 13 years.

Steve Tocco
4 years ago
They’re all exceptional artists and I’m convinced Antonio Sanchez is not human.

Steven Reichert
3 years ago
A stage full of geniuses.

Luiz Janela
4 years ago
Heard trumpet sound, came to see if it was Pat soloing, but this time i was wrong. Great Cuong Vu. Beautiful!

geraldotorres35
5 years ago
Lets not forget Mr. Steve Rodby this guy sure keeps a smooth steady pulse love his groove PMG pls get back together …plssss

Joyce Sweeting
4 years ago
Pat becomes one with his guitar …you gotta luv it! 🙂

00xanawolf00
4 years ago
This is the first time I’ve heard this…

My mind is blown.

Fabio Copponi
4 years ago
Bona’s solo is a piece of magic…the calls to old jazz pieces are fantastic

edward shivers
4 years ago
GREATEST LIVE PERFORMANCE OF ALL TIME

Sometimes it’s easy for people to get in touch with appreciation.

Here and now, it’s easy for me to get in touch with my appreciation for the cats, pop-up shopping experiences, the Pat Metheny Group, the beauty surrounding me, and — of course! — YOU.

 

Day 2484: Inappropriate

Almost two years ago (but who’s counting?) I wrote a post titled “Appropriate.” As I often tell  members of my Coping and Healing groups, whenever we name an important topic in the room, the opposite is also implied.   Therefore, anything I write about “Inappropriate” today would also include aspects of “Appropriate.”

I think it’s appropriate that I move on with this blog post.

The inspiration for today’s blog post is somebody saying inappropriate things to me yesterday. By inappropriate, I mean

• disrespectful,
• toxic,
• unprofessional,
• unpleasant,
• misdirected,
• insulting,
• condescending, and
• dishonest.

Is it inappropriate to consult an online dictionary to see if that definition includes any of the same words in my list above?

in·ap·pro·pri·ate
/ˌinəˈprōprēət/
adjective
not suitable or proper in the circumstances.
“there are penalties for inappropriate behavior”
synonyms: unsuitable, unfitting, ill-suited, unseemly, unbecoming, unprofessional, unfit, unbefitting, indecorous, improper, lacking in propriety, ungentlemanly, unladylike.

“Unprofessional” makes it to both lists of “inappropriate.”   Almost all of the other “inappropriate” words are appropriate to my experience yesterday (although I wonder about the appropriateness of “ungentlemanly” or “unladylike”).

When somebody is inappropriate, I

• am shocked,
• get angry,
• feel at a loss for the right things to say,
• try to get away from the person as soon as possible, and
• enlist appropriate people to help me deal with the situation.

What do you do when somebody is inappropriate?

I’m not sure if any of my photos from yesterday are appropriate to today’s topic.

Personally, I think love is always appropriate.

Here’s “Inappropriate Behavior” by Lime Cordiale, performed live on the streets of Llanes, Spain.

Is it inappropriate that I also featured an Australian band in yesterday’s post?   Is it inappropriate that I’m guessing how my readers from Australia are going to respond?

Gratitude is never inappropriate, so thanks to all who helped me create today’s “Inappropriate” post and — of course! — to you, my always appropriate readers.

Day 2483: Crowded

As usual, my mind is crowded with lots of thoughts, including ideas about what to write in today’s blog post.

Last night, I watched part of the debate among the crowded field of Democratic candidates for President of these United States. Did anybody stand out from the crowd, for you?

Yesterday, my day was crowded with three Coping and Healing groups — two for patients and one for staff.

In one of the groups, I handed out the Rumi poem “The Guest House” which mentions “a crowd of sorrows.”

I love this kind of acceptance of whatever thought or feeling enters our crowded hearts and minds. In other words, nothing we feel or think should be considered trash.

 

The white boards in the group rooms were crowded with lots of topics.

The word “unexpected” stood out from one of those crowded lists.

It looks like the letter “D” has been crowded off the page in that photo.

Let’s see what other recent photos are on my crowded iPhone:

Our awareness of our positive qualities are often crowded out by our focus on our negative ones. That’s why we made a list of positive qualities in one of yesterday’s groups.

Here’s “Don’t Dream It’s Over” by Crowded House.

 

Hey now, hey now, I’m facing a day crowded with individual therapy appointments and two groups, so this post is over (but not before I share a crowd of thanks).

 

 

 

Day 2482: Difficult people

Yesterday, in a Coping and Healing group, non-difficult people talked about difficult people.

If it’s difficult to see “difficult people’ in that list of topics, it’s on the third line, third topic from the right..  Some solutions to dealing with difficult people are also on that third line: “self care” and “letting it go.”

Coincidentally,  I was researching difficult people the day before that group.  Here‘s a link to a Psychology Today article by Kimberley Key — “How to Handle a Crazymaker:  4 keys to keep from losing it when they start playing games.”  Kimberley Key’s 4 keys to dealing with difficult people are:

1. Take an observer’s point of view.
2. Maintain a healthy sense of self worth.
3. Keep a healthy distance.
4. Cultivate internal validation.

I need to deal with a difficult person at work today.  Blogging about that, here and now, is reducing the difficulty for me — I’m actually looking forward to the opportunity to practice these helpful skills.

Is that difficult to believe?

Let’s see if there are difficult people in my other photos from yesterday:

Harley deals with difficult people by hiding under the bed.

Even difficult people can inspire good things.  It was because of a difficult person that I wrote my first original song, 16 months ago:

And a difficult person inspired my latest song, which I performed at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe last month:

How do you deal with difficult people?

Here’s another way I deal with difficult people: I get in touch with the gratitude I have for all the non-difficult people in my life, including YOU.

 

Day 2481: What makes you feel better

Yesterday, in a Coping and Healing group, we made a list of “What makes you feel better.”

What’s on your personal list of “What makes you feel better”?

What makes me feel better includes creating these blog posts and taking photos:

Also, Michael’s meals, voting, helpful rules, and flamingos make me feel better.

Here‘s KIRA with “If It Makes You Feel Better.”

If it makes you feel better, please leave a comment.

As always, it makes me feel better to express my gratitude to all who help me create better posts, including YOU.

 

Day 2480: Different

Although I’ve published many different posts, including Day 2394: A little bit different, Day 1930: Lucky to be different, Day 1835: Different ways to say things, Day 1762: Different parts, Day 1726: Different perspectives, Day 972: Intentionally Different, Day 689: Different styles,  Day 690: Different styles (continued), and Day 453: Different languages (and dances), this post is different from all the other ones, just as each one of us is different from everybody else.

When I give a 5-minute talk at my college reunion on September 21, I’m going to stress how different I am, with this beginning:

Everybody our age remembers where they were and what they were doing on November 22, 1963. I’m different from the rest of you.  I have no memories of that day, because I was having heart surgery to receive my first cardiac pacemaker.

Every time I rewrite that opening, it’s different, but the meaning remains the same.

This post is different because it has only three photos.

Today is going to be different because

• I’ll be facilitating a different version of my Coping and Healing groups for staff at the Primary Care Practice of the major Boston hospital where I work and
• each day is different from what we expect.

Last night, I asked my boyfriend Michael — who is different from everybody else —  if he thought that staff group would go okay today.  He said (in different words), “Why should this be different from every other time you’ve done this before?”

Here’s “Dare to be Different” by Donovan (with a slideshow of different photos created by passage2truth):

 

As always, I care about your different thoughts and feelings about this post.

There are many different ways to express gratitude to those who help me create this blog and to those who read it, and here are some of them: