Day 3087: Sitting with the discomfort

Last week, when I was sitting at my laptop conducting an online therapy session, I gave somebody the assignment of sitting with the discomfort. When that person had some discomfort figuring out the details of the assignment, I said, “Sit for ten minutes every day, get in touch with the discomfort, and see what happens.” My belief was that it would not be difficult to get in touch with discomfort, because we are all feeling some discomfort these days.

Because I feel discomfort asking somebody to do something I am not willing to do, I committed to doing the same assignment of sitting with the discomfort daily for ten minutes until our next therapy session.

I have been sitting with the discomfort since then and, as I sit here with some discomfort (the aches and pains of early rising), I am comforted to tell you that I am finding that assignment helpful.

Too often, we deal with our discomfort with distraction, addictions, avoidance, and disconnection. It helps to just BE with the discomfort for ten minutes a day, noticing and observing without judgment.

Here are some images I captured yesterday when I was not sitting with the discomfort:

.

There is some sitting, some discomfort, but mostly joy in “Good Morning” from Singin’ in the Rain.

I won’t be sitting with discomfort waiting for comments on this sitting-with-discomfort blog post.

I am grateful and comforted to be sitting, standing, walking, and blogging for you!

Day 3085: What’s the theme of this post?

Very rarely, I look at all the images I’ve gathered during a 24-hour period and have trouble coming up with an underlying or overlying theme. When that happens, I turn to my readers and ask “What’s the theme of this post?”

Who wants to play?

Maybe the theme today is “favorite things”?

In case that’s a possibility, here’s John Coltrane playing “My Favorite Things.”

What do you think the theme of this post is? There are no wrong answers, so please leave a comment, below.

One overlying or underlying theme in all my posts is gratitude, so thanks to all who help me blog every day, including YOU.

Day 3084: My mind

Today’s blog is brought to you by my mind and by The Daily Bitch Calendar.

Yesterday, my mind tried to set Twitter on fire with flying thoughts about popular proverbs and other matters:

.

My mind was very occupied facilitating two Coping and Healing therapy groups yesterday, so I hope you don’t mind that I have only three photos of the outdoors to share today.

.

There are usually songs going through my mind and I’m noticing that there are lots of songs with “mind” in the title. Here, according to ranker.com, is #1:

My mind went to “Georgia on my Mind” which was #43 on ranker.com’s list, which blows my mind!

My mind will answer any comments your mind leaves, below.

My mind, as always, is filled with gratitude, so thanks to all the minds that help me pull these blog posts out of my mind every day, including yours!

Day 3083: Lovable

My lovable readers, which of today’s images seem lovable to you?

Personally, I think the Daily Bitch is very lovable. And cognitive distortions like personalization get in the way of feeling lovable.

Is this a lovable version of “You’re Nobody ‘til Somebody Loves You”?

No matter how lovable you feel, please leave a comment, below.

It’s lovable to express and receive gratitude, so thanks to all who help me blog daily, including YOU.

Day 3082: I forgive you

Many people I work with in therapy have trouble forgiving themselves for past mistakes and transgressions. Yesterday, I gave somebody this assignment: to look themselves in the face (in a mirror, any other reflective surface, or, yesterday, during our ZOOM call) and say, “I forgive you.” We practiced that many times during the therapy session, with this person adding their name at the end of the self-forgiving statement.

I’ve been practicing that also, and it really helps. I forgive you, Ann, for

• being irritable with lots of people lately,
• your lapses in memory,
• repeating yourself,
• unintentionally hurting other people’s feelings,
• your internalized sexism, ageism, racism, and other isms,
• not being good at everything,
• not understanding everything,
• doing less walking yesterday because of the heat,
• taking only one photo outside yesterday,

• not getting a better shot of those ducks,
• eating meat in a restaurant last night,

• buying way too much Ferrero Rocher gelato,

• being a daily bitch,

• seeing monsters where they don’t exist,
• being a monster at times,
• having trust issues,
• scaring Harley just by moving too quickly,

• comparing Harley to your late, lamented kitty Oscar,
• repeating yourself, and
• spending too much time on Twitter.

I forgive you, Ann, for sharing this song for the umpteenth time.

I forgive you, Ann, for asking people to comment on your blog about their own experience with self-forgiveness.

I forgive you, Ann, for ending each blog in the same way, day after day.

Day 3080: Find your happy place

Even when your place has no air conditioning during a heat wave, it’s still possible to find your happy place.

This sign was at a happy place in our local shopping mall, where we were searching for a fan to make our place a cooler and therefore happy place:

How do you find your happy place? Is it inside yourself? Is it outside?

.

Can you find your happy place shopping at a mall?

.

Can you find your happy place on social media?

.

Sometimes you need to find your sad place before you can find your happy place.

Very soon, I’ll be finding my happy place when I have a ZOOM call this morning with my friend Megan, who is moving to a new happy place in Connecticut with her family.

Let’s see if the Daily Bitch can find her happy place.

This is what I find on YouTube when I try to find “find your happy place.”

I find my happy place through gratitude, so thanks to everyone who helps make this blogging place happier, including YOU.

Day 3078: It’s No Lie

It’s no lie that I am

• going to meet up with blogger Mark Bialczak, his dear wife Karen, and his sweet dog Ellie B. on Cape Cod today,
• looking forward to the weekend,
• keeping this blog going for the 3078th day in a row,
• wanting you to understand that my impressive blogging streak does include making sure that my then-boyfriend, now-husband Michael wrote three entries after my open heart/valve replacement surgery in 2016, and
• terrible at lying.

.

It’s no lie that it helps to know that you are not alone — that’s why I love being a group therapist (and that’s no lie either).

It’s no lie that my coping strategies, as we all deal with the pandemic and politics, include blogging, singing, dancing, walking, talking, eating, and tweeting.

.

It’s no lie that I’m no expert on lots of things, including Brazilians.

It’s no lie that Mark Bialczak and I both love Steely Dan and it’s no lie that I was singing and dancing to this in my neighborhood yesterday:

It’s no lie that I end each blog post with gratitude, so thanks to all who help me blog every day, including YOU!

Day 3076: Walking the walk

Before I began walking my walk yesterday, I tweeted this:

Why did I post that I was better at walking and talking than I was at tweeting? I was doing the familiar and unhelpful cognitive distortion of comparisons — feeling “less than” because everyone I looked at on Twitter was getting way more likes and replies than I was.

Usually I tweet just for fun, not caring about numbers; yesterday, I got caught up in comparisons and felt worse and worse. I kept tweeting, hoping I would get more responses. I didn’t. I knew I would feel better if I stopped tweeting and started walking, but I didn’t, for TWO HOURS on a BEAUTIFUL day.

This reminded me of a therapy session earlier when somebody was talking about the difficulty of breaking old patterns of taking risks with money. This person was stuck in those behaviors and in unhelpful comparisons, too, which we talked about.

I broke my own comparison/tweeting cycle by posting the tweet above, putting on my shoes, and walking the walk.

.

After watching that duck swimming the swim, I tweeted this tweet:

Eventually, I stopped walking and saw impressive evidence of Michael decking the deck:

.

I messaged this message to my friend Jenn, who loves pugs …

… and enjoyed eating the eats.

I prepared for blogging the blog by capturing all these other images:

As usual, the Daily Bitch is bitching the bitch.

Here’s what was playing when I was walking the walk by the sea:

I can’t believe there are only 106 likes on YouTube for that amazing performance of the wonderful “Sea Journey” by the late, great Chick Corea, who always walked the walk. Here he is walking his fingers all over the keyboards with his Elektric Band in “Side Walk”:

Who wants to comment the comment?

Thanks to all who help me walk the walk, talk the talk, tweet the tweet, and blog the blog, including YOU!

Day 3075: Hope over fear

I woke up to this email this morning:

I’m always looking for hope over fear. Do you see that in my other images for today?

.

I’m hoping for hope over fear as we navigate the future.

I hope you enjoy these songs that appeared in today’s post (here, here, and here on YouTube):

Hope over fear that there will be comments on this post.

Gratitude over everything, so thanks to all who help me put hope over fear every day, including YOU!

Day 3074: Death is But a Dream

Yesterday, during Memorial Day in the USA, I watched the PBS documentary “Death is But a Dream.” Here is the official trailer of “Death is But a Dream”:

I plan to tell people I work with who are dying about “Death is But a Dream,” which movingly describes the dreams of terminally ill people.

My life near the ocean is but a dream, as you might see in today’s photos.

.

I hope that peace is not just a dream

Twitter is but a dream.

Edinburgh feels like a dream to me now.

Here is the TED talk by Dr. Christopher Kerr of “Death is But a Dream”:

I expect that when I am dying I will dream about my father, my mother, my friends Hillel, Eleanor, Tony, and Michelle, Oscar and several other cats, and maybe some of my patients. I find this dreamily comforting, here and now.

What are your thoughts and feelings about this death-is-but-a-dream post?

Thanks to all who help me fulfill my dream of blogging every day that I am still on this earth, including YOU.