Last week in a therapy group, somebody used the word “flexpectations” to describe an effective coping strategy. Rather than getting stuck in and disappointed by expectations and assumptions, this person tried flexibly adapting their expectations as situations developed and changed.
Since then, I’ve worked on flexpectations while planning trips for September and May and — despite my old habit of expecting disappointment — good things are happening when I least expect them!
Let’s practice flexpectations as we make our way through the rest of this blog post.
Here and now, I have flexpectations about meteors, social media, Bomb Pops, and handshakes.
Here’s what I find when I search YouTube for “flexpectations.”
I have flexpectations about what comments I’ll get about this post and I have gratitude for all who helped me create it, including YOU!
I want to share photos with you every day, including this one from our local supermarket:
People want to buy many things at a supermarket, don’t they? I want to choose foods from the healthy sections of a market (usually located along the outer edges) but sometimes I want items in the middle.
I want to share a definition of “want.”
I want to point out that “want” means desire, should, AND deficiency. I want to make a brilliant point about that, but my mind is in want of brilliance right now.
Here are some brilliant minds writing about “want.”
I want to share more images with you, which I hope you want to see.
Here’s what I find on YouTube when I search for “want.”
“Two wrongs don’t make a right” was one of my late mother’s favorite sayings. Another favorite saying of my mother’s was “there’s a place for everything and everything in its place” so I think this is the place for today’s Daily Bitch Calendar.
It sure as hell would make me feel better right now to share a photo of my mother. It’s right that I coincidentally captured an image of my mother with my son Aaron yesterday when I took a picture of our cat, Joan (on the right).
Two humans — my husband Michael and I — were wrong in worrying that our old and fretful shelter cat Harley would never accept shelter cat Joan. Those two together definitely make a right.
There’s a place for everything and this is the place I’ll share a story about my mother and me and “two wrongs don’t make a right.” I was born with a heart that was wrong, which resulted in many hospitalizations and my needing pacemakers from a very young age. We didn’t know what kind of heart condition I had until my very right and still current cardiologist, Dr. Deeb Salem, figured out in the 1980’s that I had the very rare heart condition of congenitally corrected transposition of the great arteries (CCTGA). When Dr. Salem rightly described how my heart was very wrong in two different ways — (1) the aorta and the pulmonary arteries are switched and (2) the ventricles are also switched — and
that means all the blood ends up in the right place and
having just one of those wrongs would have killed me when I was born in 1953 because of what kinds of heart surgeries were available then,
I turned to my mother and said “You know how you always say ‘two wrongs don’t make a right?’ I guess not!”
There’s a place for everything and this is the place for me to say that I miss my mother and my father every day.
It’s right that many of my images for today have twos in them.
It seems wrong to me that onion rings and kissing — both very right in their own way — are celebrated on the same day.
Here’s what I find on YouTube when I search for “two wrongs don’t make a right.”
When I searched for information about Brian Regan just now, I found out that he’s appearing at a great venue near me next week, which was better than expected. I just splurged on National Splurge Day and got two better-than-expected tickets for that show.
If Michael agrees to go with me, that will be better than expected.
What’s been better than expected for you?
Thanks to all who are reading this better-than-expected blog post, including YOU!
I will wear blue, because I support the men in my life to lead a healthy lifestyle, and I care about their well-being.
For example, I tell my husband Michael that I wish he would stop vaping, although I recognize that nicotine is very addictive.
Michael, who does all the cleaning and the cooking here, gets blue when he finds the shells of unsalted sunflower seeds (my chosen snack to lead a healthy lifestyle) around the house, so I’ve told him I will give up my beloved sunflower seeds forever if he stops vaping. I hope he takes me up on my offer, because I want Michael to live a long, long time.
Last night, over a delicious and healthy lifestyle dinner that Michael cooked …
… we talked about hiccups. Michael, who gets them when he eats bread, stated his opinion that everybody hates getting hiccups except for me. I thought of something that Michael often says to me: “Hate’s a strong word.” I told Michael that while I don’t love getting the hiccups, I find them a mild annoyance and assumed I was not alone. (I assume everyone is not alone about anything, which might be why I love being a group therapist.)
I realized that because I have so many followers on Twitter I could test my assumption about hiccups by asking this question:
And sure enough, many people hated having the hiccups but several found them only a mild annoyance. Michael laughed when I told him that somebody on Twitter got mad at me for asking what he thought was such a stupid question. (Being on Twitter has helped me get over my fear of people getting mad at me, which is good for my healthy lifestyle.)
I sometimes get blue when I think about how my wonderful late parents never got to meet true-blue Michael. I like to imagine all of us sitting around the dinner table — my father and Michael both being hilarious and my mother and Michael bonding about so many things, including cats and keeping a clean house.
Here are more images I want to share on Wear BLUE Day.