“Being here, being there” is something I wrote on the white-board wall while human beings were being here and there during a Coping and Healing group yesterday.
Being human beings, their thoughts went here and there to regrets, the past, the present, the future, work, other people’s reactions, progress, tears, fears, emotions, death, showing up, reservations, reasons, sleeping, bravery, speaking, not speaking, triggers, early, late, and choices, among other here-and-there meanderings.
Being that triggers were affecting all the human beings in the room, “triggers” ended up being the topic of choice, including what helps dealing with them:
Being there, I couldn’t help but notice that “YouTube” made it to the list of what helped those human beings deal with triggers (along with breathing, acceptance, self care, sleep, safe spaces, kindness, music, and other helpful choices).
Being here, I’ll search for “being here, being there” on YouTube.
Here‘s “I Love Being Here With You” by singer/songwriter Peggy Lee.
I love being here with you, and I loved being there when I took all these other photos:
Being that you’re here, why not leave a comment?
Whether I’m being here or being there, I’m being thankful for all who help me create these posts and — of course! — for YOU, here and now.
Almost two years ago (but who’s counting?) I wrote a post titled “Appropriate.” As I often tell members of my Coping and Healing groups, whenever we name an important topic in the room, the opposite is also implied. Therefore, anything I write about “Inappropriate” today would also include aspects of “Appropriate.”
I think it’s appropriate that I move on with this blog post.
The inspiration for today’s blog post is somebody saying inappropriate things to me yesterday. By inappropriate, I mean
disrespectful,
toxic,
unprofessional,
unpleasant,
misdirected,
insulting,
condescending, and
dishonest.
Is it inappropriate to consult an online dictionary to see if that definition includes any of the same words in my list above?
in·ap·pro·pri·ate
/ˌinəˈprōprēət/
adjective
not suitable or proper in the circumstances.
“there are penalties for inappropriate behavior”
synonyms: unsuitable, unfitting, ill-suited, unseemly, unbecoming, unprofessional, unfit, unbefitting, indecorous, improper, lacking in propriety, ungentlemanly, unladylike.
“Unprofessional” makes it to both lists of “inappropriate.” Almost all of the other “inappropriate” words are appropriate to my experience yesterday (although I wonder about the appropriateness of “ungentlemanly” or “unladylike”).
When somebody is inappropriate, I
am shocked,
get angry,
feel at a loss for the right things to say,
try to get away from the person as soon as possible, and
enlist appropriate people to help me deal with the situation.
What do you do when somebody is inappropriate?
I’m not sure if any of my photos from yesterday are appropriate to today’s topic.
Is it inappropriate that I also featured an Australian band in yesterday’s post? Is it inappropriate that I’m guessing how my readers from Australia are going to respond?
Gratitude is never inappropriate, so thanks to all who helped me create today’s “Inappropriate” post and — of course! — to you, my always appropriate readers.
As usual, my mind is crowded with lots of thoughts, including ideas about what to write in today’s blog post.
Last night, I watched part of the debate among the crowded field of Democratic candidates for President of these United States. Did anybody stand out from the crowd, for you?
Yesterday, my day was crowded with three Coping and Healing groups — two for patients and one for staff.
In one of the groups, I handed out the Rumi poem “The Guest House” which mentions “a crowd of sorrows.”
I love this kind of acceptance of whatever thought or feeling enters our crowded hearts and minds. In other words, nothing we feel or think should be considered trash.
The white boards in the group rooms were crowded with lots of topics.
The word “unexpected” stood out from one of those crowded lists.
It looks like the letter “D” has been crowded off the page in that photo.
Let’s see what other recent photos are on my crowded iPhone:
Our awareness of our positive qualities are often crowded out by our focus on our negative ones. That’s why we made a list of positive qualities in one of yesterday’s groups.
Hey now, hey now, I’m facing a day crowded with individual therapy appointments and two groups, so this post is over (but not before I share a crowd of thanks).
When I give a 5-minute talk at my college reunion on September 21, I’m going to stress how different I am, with this beginning:
Everybody our age remembers where they were and what they were doing on November 22, 1963. I’m different from the rest of you. I have no memories of that day, because I was having heart surgery to receive my first cardiac pacemaker.
Every time I rewrite that opening, it’s different, but the meaning remains the same.
This post is different because it has only three photos.
Today is going to be different because
I’ll be facilitating a different version of my Coping and Healing groups for staff at the Primary Care Practice of the major Boston hospital where I work and
each day is different from what we expect.
Last night, I asked my boyfriend Michael — who is different from everybody else — if he thought that staff group would go okay today. He said (in different words), “Why should this be different from every other time you’ve done this before?”
telling everybody about the healing power of groups, and
taking photos of what I see around me.
I can’t stop, won’t stop posting videos of my performances even though I have — OMG! — only 18 subscribers to my YouTube channel. Here’s the latest video:
Can’t stop, won’t stop singing about triggers until all the worst triggers go away.
Can’t stop, won’t stop expressing gratitude to all who help me keep going every day, including YOU.
Yesterday, somebody in a “Coping and Healing” group suggested that we share thoughts and feelings about “It’s okay,” especially since the week before we had focused on “It’s NOT okay.”
I hope it’s okay that I share what I wrote in that group:
It’s okay that my “It’s okay!” poem is on its side.
Here are more photos residing on my okay iPhone:
It’s okay that I missed last night’s spectacular sunset, because I was facilitating the Coping and Healing group. Yes, somebody else took that much-more-than-okay last photo.
I hope I have my readers’s permission to start this post with a definition:
per·mis·sion
/pərˈmiSHən/
noun
consent; authorization.
“they had entered the country without permission”
synonyms: authorization, consent, leave, authority, sanction, license, dispensation, assent, acquiescence, agreement, approval, seal of approval, approbation, endorsement, blessing, imprimatur, clearance, acceptance, allowance, tolerance, sufferance, empowerment, freedom, liberty
an official document giving authorization.
plural noun: permissions
“permissions to reproduce copyright material”
I hope I have your permission to wonder this about that definition: Why are so many people so focused on others entering countries without permission? Is that REALLY the worst problem the world is facing? Aren’t there other problems we should be erasing?
With or without permission, I’m going to state my position: we are all occupants of this planet, dammit! Why can’t we all come and go as we please, with more ease?
I know that if I were running for office in my home country with an attitude like that one, my quest for election would definitely be soon done.
Here’s my admission about why I’m focusing on permission:
I took that photo without anybody’s permission. That was my decision.
“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
“When you give yourself permission to communicate what matters to you in every situation you will have peace despite rejection or disapproval. Putting a voice to your soul helps you to let go of the negative energy of fear and regret.”
― Shannon L. Alder
“The more people you have to ask for permission, the more dangerous a project gets.”
― Alain de Botton
“When people change they do not ask your permission.”
― Jennifer Pierre
“Quiet the noise around you; soften its pitch. Our deepest stories are our best teachers. Let the weapons of the weak — the poison, the nagging, the gossip — burn themselves to ash. Cast them to the wind. Take back the permission to succeed. Make it yours.”
― Elissa Altman
“Stop looking for permission from other people to do what you know you are meant to do.”
― Adam Smith
“Do you really need permission? Still waiting for that invitation to your life? No one is going to give it to you…only you can do that.”
― Jennifer Ho-Dougatz
“When we give ourselves permission to go wherever our outlandish thoughts take us, we feel that rush of creativity and excitement.”
―Teresa R. Funke, Bursts of Brilliance for a Creative Life blog
Without a permit, here are other photos I’ll submit:
You can give yourself permission, my dear, to let go of future fear. Make a magic incantation without any hesitation.
Who gave me the permission to rhyme all this time? It’s inspired by listening to a rap musical sublime.
Whether Clark on Stage got permission to do this cover I don’t know. I’m still grateful that he gave it a go.
Whenever there’s a lot a stake, give yourself permission to take a break.
No matter what your position, you don’t need permission to make a comment submission.
Thanks to all who help me create, including my readers, who are GREAT.
One my favorite daily tasks is creating this daily blog. That helps me face all my other daily tasks, no matter what I’m in the mood for. My daily blogging tasks include sharing my photos from yesterday:
What’s on your list of daily tasks?
My tasks today include
getting ready for work,
driving to a parking lot near Boston’s Fenway Park,
pronouncing “Park” unlike a native Bostonian,
walking the mile to the hospital where I work,
being on “Quick Response” for the doctors and patients of the Primary Care Practice at the hospital,
eating the right amount of greens to maintain a good INR level,
ordering a half-portion of the best hospital macaroni and cheese I’ve ever had in my life,
facilitating a “Coping and Healing” group,
doing individual therapy, and
enjoying the start of a long weekend.
Tomorrow, my tasks include
doing individual therapy,
taking my car in to be serviced,
looking for comfortable, affordable, and spectacular-enough clothes for my 45th college reunion, and
enjoying the long weekend.
Here‘s “Relaxing Concentration Music — designed to help you work, study, and focus on your task.”
Perhaps that music will help you focus on the task of leaving a comment, below.
Another one of my daily tasks is finding gratitude and sharing it with you.
Thanks to all the people who help me with my daily tasks and thanks — of course! — to my wonderful readers, including YOU.
