Some time ago, I made up a remedy for unhelpful thoughts, called the Equal Time Rule.
If you have time for the equal time rule today, here it is:
The Equal Time Rule. To be fair, why not balance out the time spent on negative thoughts with positive thoughts? For example, if you spend a certain amount of time worrying or catastrophizing about something that then turns out okay, consider spending that much time feeling good about the outcome. Or, if you are focusing on a negative, critical person and worrying about how they might affect you, try to give equal time and power to a positive, supportive person.
Last night, at my 45th high school reunion, I gave equal time to:
- talking to supportive people,
- going out on a boat in the harbor near the reunion site,
- eating yummy food, and
- singing and dancing to old familiar songs.
It took me equal amounts of time to snap each one of these equal photos — before, during and after the reunion:
According to my equal time rule, people should give equal time to feeling good, after a concerning situation turns out well. Because I like to give equal time to giving advice AND to listening to my own advice, I shall now use the equal time rule to:
- spend a full six months feeling good about how well the reunion turned out AND
- spend a full friggin’ TEN MONTHS feeling good about how healthy I am, because I danced as long as anybody else did at that reunion last night.
I shall now give equal time to a song I sang last night at the reunion (which I did not sing equal in quality as I did in this YouTube video, when I sang the same song six months ago):
However, somebody at the reunion last night gave me a LOT of equal and supportive time telling me how great I sounded, singing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight.”
I hope you give equal time today to taking good care of yourself and interacting with supportive people.
Equal-time thanks to everybody who helped me create this timely post and to you — of course! — for spending equal time reading and (I hope!) commenting.
The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally 
You always make me think in a more layered way!
Thank you for your equally wonderful support, Julie!
I like your thinking Ann. Glad you enjoyed your reunion. Thanks for sharing.
I want to give equal time to this: I like your thinking too, Ruth.
Equal time to celebrating a positive outcome…to match the time worrying about the possible outcome. If we all did that, we’d live in a better world. Brilliant concept, Ann. Thanks. ☺ Love that a class reunion involved a boat ride. Sweet.
p.s…..Wimoweh, wimoweh, wimoweh, wimoweh.
I would like to give MORE than equal time to you, Van. ❤
Ann, I am so glad you had a wonderful time at your reunion, as it seemed everyone else had an equally good time as evidenced in the video. Wow, you are very brave for having sung that song and did it with such elegance and panache (I like that word panache – I think I will try to use it five times today).
As far as giving equal time to worrying and enjoying the outcome – I agree completely. I was kind of worried about our little trip to Las Vegas – but it turned out so well (even if it didn’t play out as we had planned – it was BETTER!!) and the boys can go home with new motivation and a sense of direction about their bodybuilding dreams. And I met some of the coolest, most intereesting people!! What more could you ask for?
Have a marvelous Sunday – must drive home – through the desert – UGH!
I’m so glad you gave so much time reading and commenting here, SD, with all you’ve been doing! I must give equal time to this explanation: that video wasn’t from my reunion last night. It was from a gathering of social workers where I work, earlier this year. I didn’t have time to videotape last night’s performance, but I enjoyed both parties equally!
P.S. And thanks for commenting with such panache!
Ohhh! – oops – did I read that wrong? Because I have to tell you Ann – some of those people seemed super young for being at a 45 year reunion, like they probably weren’t even born 45 years ago. Ok, that makes a lot more sense. Duh!!! (I am going to blame this lack of mental capacity of the fact I have had to sleep on hotel beds – not a solid sleep at all). Well, wherever you sang that song – it was with great panache (1 time, 4 more to go).
my yin
is heavier
than my
yan 🙂
thank you for
your lightness
and calm
I guess the equal time issue is perhaps about relearning how to interpret situations in a more positive way. Relearning is most difficult once it’s a life-long habit. My father could never relearn it, no matter how hard my mother tried. It’s mostly fear, but it could be genetic also.
Thank you for taking this time to share your thoughts today, Maria, about equal time, relearning, and your parents.
so glad you had such a great and successful reunion! The boat ride looked GREAT!!
Thank you, Lisa, for this GREAT comment.
What is Facebook? Is there equal time in Facebook?
Aw Harley…You’re everything to me, you know that!
I think Ann has done a tremendous job with Oscar’s Facebook page. He’s finally getting the attention he deserves, and as a grandmother I’m really proud of him! Oh Oscar!
Equal time for these cats!
Another wonderful post that leaves one feeling better inside
I always love giving you equal time, Joanne — you leave me feeling better inside!
The reunion looks as though it went fabulously!!
It did and I want to give equal time for thanks to you for your fabulous comment.
I am equally impressed that you can hold your own with “The Lion Sleeps Tonight”. Great song to sing to, but there are some tricky parts!
I am equally impressed with you!!
Awwwwwwww 🙂
What a wonderful and invigorating post! I’m so glad you enjoyed the reunion and even more glad that you are going to spend months celebrating the great job you did and your health. I hope the lion sleeps well tonight.
Some comments are more equal than others. Every time you comment, Maureen, I am equally grateful.
Such a heart warming post, Ann! And I love your voice in this video as well (i saw the other one too.)
I’m so glad that you had such a great time… And I love your idea about The Equal Time Rule.
Have a great day 😀
I’m so happy about the time you took to write all these equally wonderful words, Heena. Many thanks.
You’re welcome, Ann. It was my pleasure to have read your post. And I’m looking forward to be regular visitor here, but of course, as and when time allows 🙂
Have a glorious day!
You have such a beautiful way of rounding out the jagged edges in life. I have spent too much time giving the deflating balloon attention and not enough time to the balloon that soared gleefully above my head. Thank you for sharing the exercise in rebuilding thought processing. ❤️
I used to fear class reunions, so much so that I refused to go to any one of them. This year I had decided to attend, but the birth of my new baby niece came. I wasn’t about to miss that precious event. I’ll just get myself to the next one. 🙂
BTW, The Lion King is one of my favorite movies of all time, and you do a beautiful job singing that song!
I wanted to take equal time to express my gratitude towards you for all the gifts you bring to others. I am so happy to see you back here! And congratulations on the birth of your precious niece.
Thank you, Ann. I hope you enjoy a wonderful week. It is good to be back. You are a beacon.☕️❤️
I’m pleased it went well, especially the dancing
I am equally glad, Derrick! Many and equal thanks to you.
Bravo, Ann. You planned, executed, and appreciated your odd-number high school reunion. I’m so happy.
OMG! It took me way more than equal time to see this comment, Mark. I am equally happy to see you here.
Yeah! Love this Ann. Brava mia Bella!
I’ll give equal time to you, Val, whenever possible!
Pingback: Day 1130: Time | The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally
Pingback: Day 1168: Times | The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally
Pingback: Day 2827: Time | The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally