You’re probably in violent agreement with me that one rarely sees the words “violent” and “agreement” linked together, as they are in today’s post title. You might violently agree that the words “violent” and “disagreement” are MUCH more commonly paired.
People who have have read this blog before could be in violent agreement about all this:
- I usually blog about things that have happened the day before.
- If I see or hear something that agrees with me (violently or otherwise), it appears in this blog.
- Since I started this daily blog, cardiologists have been in violent disagreement about my very unusual heart, including how it affects my health and my prognosis.
Yesterday, I wrote a despairing (if not violent) email to my chief cardiologist, Dr. Deeb Salem, with the subject heading “descending into confusion and anxiety (again).”
Hi Deeb,
I know that’s a dramatic subject heading, but there it is.
One heart specialist tells me I’m in class 2 heart failure, a week ago Friday.
That affects how I feel.
Another one insists that I need to have a surgical consult when I visit with her at the Mayo Clinic.
She is not available for me to ask her why.
Her very kind and nice scheduling person tells me that she was concerned by the data she saw in my records about my valve and believes a surgical consult is necessary.
My mind goes to — THEY WANT ME TO HAVE A VALVE OPERATION!
And I remember you and I deciding that the odds were not good for a valve operation.
Why would I want to talk to a surgeon in Minnesota ? There is no friggin’ way I would have the surgery out there, away from my friends and family.
So my question is this: does it make sense for me to shlepp all the way to Minneapolis, especially if the likelihood is that they are going to suggest valve surgery, which people here have already convinced me would be very dangerous?
I know that you are used to dealing with smart people who ask a lot of questions. Please answer as best you can.
I am seeing Dr. Laura Snydman today and I’m sure we will be discussing this also.
Inquisitively,
Ann
After I saw Dr. Laura Snydman yesterday (whom people would agree, violently or otherwise, is AWESOME), I checked my email and saw this:
Ann,
Give me a call.
Deeb
When I called Dr. Deeb Salem and told him where I was, he invited me up to his office.
Then, Dr. Salem listened patiently as I expressed all the thoughts and feelings in my heart, about my heart.
When I was finished, he said:
I’m in violent agreement with you.
Which immediately made me feel less violent and much more agreeable.
Isn’t it amazing how validation and agreement can do that?
As I write this “Violent Agreement” post today, Dr. Salem and I are in violent agreement about the following:
- I will consult with adult congenital heart specialists at the Mayo Clinic in May.
- My sister will accompany me there.
- No matter what happens, that will be a valuable trip.
- Brown University and the University of Edinburgh would both be non-violently agreeable places for my son to attend college next year (if he gets into both of those, which we should find out today).
Here are some pictures I took yesterday, in the midst of much violent agreement:









Are you in violent or non-violent agreement or disagreement about any of the above?
I hope you are in violent agreement with me that Dr. Salem deserves to be on my

and so do my readers, including you!