Day 2281: Desperation

There’s been a lot of desperation around here lately. Are you noticing desperation where you are?

Here’s one source of my desperation: I’m wondering if I control the universe with my anxiety.    When I am anxious about something (like planning a dinner in Los Angeles, for example), things seem to go wrong.

I also have desperation about my inability to write something on this blog without using the word “thing.”

Michael has been experiencing desperation about charging his laptop — for days, he has had to anchor the charging cord in intricate ways to  get any charge.

Yesterday, a replacement charging cord came in the mail and Michael said, “I’m going to keep that as an art installation called “Desperation.'”

Do you see desperation in my other photos from yesterday?

 

 

 

 

 

If you want to make a peep about desperation or anything else, please comment below.

Also, Dr. Matthew Salzler at Tufts Medical Center dispersed any desperation I might have about my healing rotator cuff,  a year after my falling and tearing it.

Out of desperation about not having any new ideas of how to celebrate my son’s birthday (he’s turning 21 today!) on this blog, I’m sharing, again,  his misheard lyrics of “Louie Louie” on YouTube.

Here’s a comment from somebody who might have had some desperation looking for my son’s video until finally finding it:

Deku Tree
8 months ago
I finally found you this is a weird story so sit tight

I was in a music class in elementary school and the teacher there wanted our next song we sang to be Louie Louie he then told us a story about how the song had weird misheard lyrics and showed the class this very video to show us what the misheard lyrics were and I finally found it when I was watching a video on YouTube for weird misheard lyrics throughout history and my mind thought about this video and I thought “I know the in’s and out’s of YouTube now I’ll try to find it.” and I did yes! It wasn’t even that hard to find I was just lazy back when I was a kid and didn’t look very hard now I have liked the video from my memory’s finally.

No desperation at the end of this blog post, just gratitude for all who helped me create it and — of course! — YOU.

 

Day 2272: Build your own adventure

Yesterday, when I was building my own adventure, I saw this:

Actually, I need help from others to build my own adventure.  How do you build your own adventure?

When my son was very young, he posted a build-your-own-adventure game on YouTube, which I can’t find.  Therefore, shall we build our own adventure together, here and now, using forty-eight of my photos from yesterday?

You can further build the adventure if you click on any photo you’d like to more adventurously explore.

Here‘s what comes up on YouTube for “Build Your Own Adventure”:

 

I don’t have time to make the choices for that scary adventure, because I’ve got to go out into the world and build my adventure for today.

I look forward to the adventures people build in the comments section, below.

Gratitude helps me build my own adventure, so thanks to all who helped me build today’s post and — of course! — YOU.

 

 

 

Day 2265: Loss and Change

Because I am so aware of loss and change right now, here are some quotes about “Loss and Change.”

Loss is nothing else but change, and change is nature’s delight. — Marcus Aurelius

People lose people, we lose things in our life as we’re constantly growing and changing. That’s what life is, is change, and a lot of that is loss. It’s what you gain from that loss that is life. — Thomas Jane

When you have a tough loss, go through it and agonize. I had one loss that I still want to change, but at the same time I realize it is an important part of who I am. — Andrew Shue

There is so much inherent drama in the matter of change. Disappointment in yourself and others, coping with the fact that life is essentially a shipwreck, becoming a person you yourself could not imagine yourself to be, for good and for bad, and then ultimately there is the basic matter of loss. — Jane Hamilton

The garden is growth and change and that means loss as well as constant new treasures to make up for a few disasters. — May Sarton

Do you see loss and/or change in my photos from yesterday?

I changed my framing of “CARE” to “CA”  above because of an upcoming change:  I’m flying to CA for a group therapy conference in three weeks.  Chances are that I’ll experience and witness change,  loss, disasters, and treasures while I’m there.

I was very aware of the loss of Bob Marley yesterday, because of this:

Any thoughts or feelings about loss and change?

Something that doesn’t change: how I notice and share thanks with YOU.

Day 2244: Frustration

Yesterday, when I was experiencing some frustration, I noticed that somebody had chosen to express that feeling via the emotions chart on my office door.

I wondered, “Who expressed that frustration?  Was it a patient or a staff person? Why are they feeling frustration?  Are they expressing that frustration to others?  Are they keeping the frustration to themselves?  Do they know they are not alone in feeling frustration?  How do they deal with frustration?” I felt some frustration that I did not know  — and probably would never know — the answers to my questions.

However, I can ask similar questions to you, my readers.

Are you feeling frustration these days?   Do you share your frustration or keep it to yourself?  How do you deal with frustration?

I am feeling frustration with our government, these days.  Am I alone in that frustration?

Also, people in therapy have been expressing frustration about their relationship with food, especially during and after the holidays. I suggest that people NOT beat themselves up about what they’re eating– that leads to greater frustration and more eating to comfort themselves.

In addition, last night at a Board meeting, some of us expressed frustration about ageism, and how people — even those who are sensitive in their use of language about other differences — make jokes about age all the time.  I remember feeling frustration about this when I was in Social Work graduate school, decades ago.  Of course, my frustration with this gets worse as I get older.

After the board meeting, one of the participants shared this video in an email:

Is anybody feeling frustration that I’m taking so long to share my other photos from yesterday?

 

Are people feeling frustration about any of those photos?  I’ll explain the last one — I bought a gelato-filled Panettone for the board meeting.   Nobody expressed frustration about that.

Feel free to express frustration or any other feelings or thoughts in a comment, below.

Thanks to all who helped me create this “frustration” post and to you — of course!

Day 2145: Come as you are

What does “come as you are” (which I saw in a magazine yesterday while waiting for an echocardiogram) mean to you?

Here comes an online discussion of “Come as you are”:

Best Answer: Come as you are on a party invitation indicates that the host or hostess is having a very informal party and Dress is not important. Now, if you were thinking about going naked to the party you might want to determine if it would be the best option. Things to consider might be 1. do you look good naked,2. are you secure enough in your looks to go to a party naked,3. how much importance do you put on shock and surprise of the other guests. Generally, come as you are means, if you have on jeans and a Polo and deck shoes, or in the summer if you have on shorts, a tee shirt, and sandals, you will be in acceptable attire. It simply means what it says come as you are, no need to dress up.

Only hell mama ever raised · 1 decade ago

Come as yourself and don’t try to make any false characteristics about yourself.
♥Caribbean American Princess♥ · 1 decade ago

In my Coping and Healing groups, I often say at the end, “I’m grateful that everybody showed up exactly the way they showed up today.”  I hope that’s an invitation for people to come as they are.

It’s time for my other photos from yesterday to come as they are.

As I’m creating this blog post as I am, this message keeps coming at me from WordPress:

A new editor is coming to level-up your layout.

I don’t know if I want a new editor coming to level-up my layout.   I’d prefer my blog posts to come as they are.

Here’s another entry from that online discussion about “Come as you are”:

it think that whoever has invited u listens to Nirvana, a lot…wear a Nirnana t-shirt or go naked.

Here comes Nirvana as they were, with “Come as You Are.”

 

If you’re coming here as you are from outside the USA, you may not be able to watch that video.

For the next two days, I’ll be coming as I am to a group therapy conference in New York. I assume I’ll come away from that experience as a better group therapist.

Here’s thanks coming from me to all those who helped me create this come-as-you-are post and — of course — to YOU, for coming as you are.

 

Day 2110: The Real Story

With all the conflicts among stories and among people out there, how do we figure out the real story?

Yesterday, I saw a magazine that promised to tell the real story …

… but I didn’t have the real time to read it.

Do you see the real story in any of my other photos?

 

I think the real story is different to those on the outside and those on the inside. Harley probably has a different story about last night than I do.

Also, what’s the real story with this?

Every picture tells a story, don’t it?

What’s the real story, according to you?

The real story, according to me, includes gratitude, so thanks to all who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — to YOU.

Day 2077: Applause

Several times in therapy groups this week, there was spontaneous applause, as people supported each other’s perspectives and progress.

I remember attending an “Opening the Heart” weekend workshop many years ago, where each one of us received thunderous, sustained applause after introducing ourselves. I still vividly recall how that applause felt, after I had revealed myself and my vulnerabilities to many strangers.

How do you respond to applause?

Last night, I was surprised by the timing of the applause to my latest original song, “Shameless Appeals for Applause.”

 

I now shamelessly appeal for applause for my photos from yesterday:

 

No matter what kind of comment you leave below, you’re sure to get applause from me.

Gratitude is a kind of applause, so I’m now clapping for all those who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — YOU.

Day 2034: Is this good news?

If you look at the good comments in yesterday’s post, you might notice that some good people had some trouble discerning whether that post had good news.

The news in today’s post is that I can relate to that confusion.  When I look at the news these days, I often ask myself and others, “Is this good news?”

It’s probably not news that I’m going to share many new photos and relate them to today’s topic.  I ask you, good readers,  is this good news?

 

 

Is this good news that my son Aaron took so many photos of camera-shy Michael? I guess it depends on your perspective and on who you are.

Is “Good News” by Manic Drive good news?

By the way, I continue to get good news about my dentist‘s recovery from a double lung transplant.

I look forward to all the news in your good comments.

Is this good news that I always thank those who help me create these posts and — of course! — YOU?

Day 2033: Good Bye

Good day, everybody.  Today I’ll be wishing a good bye to one of my incredibly good cardiologists, Dr. Mark Estes, who has appeared in a good many blog posts (including here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here).

What makes a good bye, especially when you do NOT want to say “good bye” to somebody?

Most importantly, let the good person know how important they are to you.

How will I let the good doctor know how important he is to me? My good bye, on this good day, will probably include these good things:

1. Reminiscing about how good Dr. Estes has been to me over a good thirty years.
2. A good greeting card.
3. Good words, written and spoken.
4. A last good look.
5. A good cry.

My good reader, what do you think makes a good bye?

Here‘s a good 2007 video showing my good doctor briefly talking about a procedure he also performed on me in 2015.

Here are some good photos I’ve recently taken:

 

That good panel from that good Dove Chocolate advertisement shows these good words:

Find someone you didn’t mean to lose.

I didn’t mean to lose Dr. Estes, but he is moving to Pennsylvania because of family reasons. I’m glad I’m going to find him today, as we say our good byes.

Before I say good bye for today, I’ll share some good thanks to Dr. Estes and everybody else who has helped me create good blog posts over the years and , of course, to all my good readers, including YOU.

 

 

Day 2007: Don’t Look Back

Don’t look back at my recent posts, or you might see this:

Don’t slavishly obey people who tell you what to do or not to do.  Look back if you want to — you might see something important.

When I look back at yesterday, I see all these things, looking back.

 

 

When I look back, I see beauty, clouds, benevolence, sympathy, fear, worry, my son Aaron, his friend Cameron, books, bunnies, and Boston.

What do you see when you look back?

Here‘s Boston telling us “Don’t Look Back.”

When I looked back at YouTube just now,  this was playing after “Don’t Look Back.”

I look forward to looking back at whatever comments there are for this “Don’t Look Back” post.

Don’t look back at my blog if you don’t want to see gratitude looking back at you.