As a group therapist, I think a lot about safe zones — how to make spaces safe enough for people to share their authentic selves and to heal.
Yesterday, I saw this right outside our door:
While this indicates the coming of a noisy zone, I’m still glad to see safe zones wherever they exist.
Today is the birthday of my oldest friend, Barbara, who helps make safe zones wherever she goes! Here’s a photo of Barbara and me in a safe zone before COVID:
Do you see safe zones in any of my other images for today?
I think it’s great that Barbara’s birthday is also International Women’s Day and National Oregon day, because she is the international woman who taught me the correct way to pronounce “Oregon.”
Here’s what I find on YouTube when I search for “Safe Zones.”
I believe we are all hoping and praying for more safe zones throughout the world, here and now.
Please leave any comments about this “Safe Zones” post in the safe-enough zone below.
Thanks to all who makes zones safer, including you.
Hyper-vigilance is well know to me, both as a therapist and as a person diagnosed with PTSD (because of my hospital experiences when I was a child and living with a very rare heart condition for 68 years).
Because of the pandemic, global warming, racism, economic disparities, and many other complex and constant abuses to our psyches and our bodies, there are very few of us who are not hyper-vigilant these days.
Here is a definition of hyper-vigilance from healthline.com:
Yesterday, when I was at a hospital waiting for a bone scan, I tweeted this as I was trying to take deep breaths and slow down some racing thoughts:
Some people on Twitter responded with gratitude for the thought, others pointed out how hyper-vigilance is not a choice. I work on hyper-vigilance every day, and I understand.
Do you see hyper-vigilance in my other images for today?
I think our phones add to our hyper-vigilance, do you?
I want to be vigilant (and not hyper) in wishing a happy birthday to my first husband (and father of our son, Aaron), who reads this blog. Happy birthday, Leon Dave, and many more!
Because of my vigilance in sharing music I love in this blog, here’s one of my favorite Thomas Dolby tunes:
Thanks to all who are vigilant enough to get to the bottom of this “Hyper-vigilance” blog post, including YOU!
At the end of every group I facilitate, I ask people what feels left unfinished, so they can get a good enough sense of closure for the group session.
I finished my day yesterday by asking this question on Twitter:
Everything can feel left unfinished, because we are all in the middle of our journeys through life. I think the best we can do is to celebrate whatever closures we can attain.
My blog posts feel left unfinished to me until I share my other images for the day.
It looks like the Daily Bitch is finished with people.
One thing that feels left unfinished to me is an explanation about our cat Joan’s recurring ear infections. Today I am taking her to the vet and am hoping for some closure about that.
These posts feel left unfinished until I share some relevant music.
“Say Yes to the Mess” is something I put on a t-shirt years ago.
I chose to wear that t-shirt yesterday, partly because we’re all imperfectly messy human beings, trying to deal with the mess we’ve made — climate change, racism, pandemics, wars, etc. etc.
Little did I know that I would be wearing that same t-shirt to the Emergency Room this morning because of the first nosebleed I’ve ever gotten in my life, which started last night at 2 AM and is showing no signs of abating as I’m writing this.
What a mess!
I’ve had no choice but to say yes to many messes in my life. Saying “yes” doesn’t mean I like the messes; saying “yes” means I accept the reality of them and do my best to deal with them while staying positive. It also means accepting the intrinsic messiness of being alive while figuring out the next achievable step to move forward.
Let’s say yes to the mess in today’s images as I wait for a doctor to show up to stop my current mess.
A doctor just came in and we’re figuring out a way to say yes to this mess and to get me home soon!
I have a weakness for Twitter, where somebody recently asked, “Do you think crying is a sign of weakness or strength?” I had the strength to answer as follows:
Do you see weakness or strength in my other images for today?
Is admitting mistakes, like today’s Daily Bitch, a sign of weakness or strength?
When I search for “weakness or strength” on YouTube, I find this:
That reminds me that exactly a year ago, the week before lockdown, I was in Times Square in New York, attending a group therapy conference and contracting COVID. Is it weakness or strength to share that with you, here and now?
Actually, I think it’s helpful to think in terms of AND, not OR, so it’s all weakness AND strength.
Many thanks to those who help me share my weakness and strength in this daily blog, including YOU!
Achieve a calm state as you take in my gratitude to all who helped me create this achieve-a-calm-state post, including my wonderful, dog-loving Primary Care doctor Laura Kate Snydman at Tufts Medical Center, Georgia food writer Angela Hansberger, Thelonius Munk, the Daily Bitch Calendar, and YOU.
Yesterday, when I was in an elevator at Tufts Medical Center, overloaded with awareness AND worry about being out and about during the coronavirus pandemic, I saw this:
Even though this blog might have an overload of photos of Dr. Salem, here is another one from my appointment with him yesterday:
During the coronavirus pandemic, frontline health workers like Dr. Salem have to wear an overload of Personal Protective Equipment. Dr. Salem, who has an overload of cardiology students wanting to work with him, told one of them yesterday that he always schedules me for his last appointment of the day because we have an overload of things to talk about. Yesterday’s overloaded conversation included
Dr. Salem’s personal experience of working with Dr. Anthony Fauci (who is “a very smart and very good guy”),
discussions of my having had the coronavirus in March and possible lasting effects of that,
scheduling an echocardiogram to make sure that there is no permanent damage to my heart because of COVID-19,
the possibility of Dr. Salem and I writing a book together,
my stating that Dr. Salem and I have an overload of respect and love for each other,
Dr. Salem saying, “I think you’re doing great,” and
scheduling our next overloaded appointment for the day after my 68th birthday in February.
Dr. Salem said he was interviewed on Boston TV recently about his experiences working with Dr. Fauci, but I can’t find that interview in the overload of videos out there about Dr. Fauci.
Here’s an overload of other photos from yesterday:
Michael overloads our plates with nutritious food, ever day.
Here‘s “Overload” by Zinnia, which has been loaded over 7 million times on YouTube.
I’m looking forward to an overload of comments, below.
As always, I have an overload of gratitude to all, including YOU.
Yesterday, after I published my breaking news post, I discovered I had cold symptoms and a slight fever.
Worried that I might have caught the coronavirus (which no one asked for) during the week-long group therapy conference in NYC, I informed my manager and my doctors. Because of my risk factors (over 60 years old, chronic heart issues), the doctors decided they would test me for the virus if my temperature went above 100.4. Also, because I’ve gotten endocarditis (a dangerous inflammation of the heart which I also never asked for) three times in my life, I usually ask to get tested for that whenever I run a fever.
No one asked for this, but I stayed home from work, watched TV, monitored my temperature, and took photos of more breaking news which nobody asked for.
I also caught up on the Stephen Colbert shows I had missed last week. I took a photo of this …
… thinking “my next blog post will probably be titled ‘No one asked for this.'”
No one asked for the coronavirus outbreak. Also, no one asked for me to run a fever of 100.6 in the evening, which I did.
When I reported my fever to my medical team, they asked me to go to the Emergency Room, another thing I’ve never asked for. I asked if I could finish the delicious salmon dish Michael had cooked for me first.
They asked me to wear a mask to the Emergency Room. Since I didn’t have a mask, they asked me to wear a scarf around my face. I asked Michael to accompany me to the Emergency Room.
They tested me for many things, including the flu and endocarditis. I certainly didn’t ask to be admitted to the hospital overnight, but the Emergency Room doctor didn’t like my oxygen levels.
No one asked for this, but here are more photos from yesterday.
No one asked for this, but they think I might have pneumonia. Whether or not you ask for this, I’ll give you more updates in my next post.
No one asked for my gratitude, but I give it willingly, every day.
The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally 