Posts Tagged With: The Replacements

Day 2066: What I’m not saying

What I’m not saying, here and now, includes many things, because I still have laryngitis.

However, I’m returning to work today, where I will do my best to encourage people to share in therapy what they’re not saying elsewhere in their lives.

Here’s a partial list of what I’m not saying:

  • Some people scare me.
  • I sometimes fear other people’s anger as well as my own anger.
  • I miss my son (who is attending University in Edinburgh) and my late friend Michelle.
  • I’m glad to be home.
  • When I’m away from work for vacation, I fear  I’ve forgotten what I need to know to be a good therapist.
  • When I name my fears, they seem more manageable.
  • If I’m confused, I can take a breath and some time to choose the next right thing to do.
  • I used to have recurring dreams of not being able to speak.
  • Communicating effectively is very important to me.
  • I will do my best to say things non-verbally today.

Whenever I put what I’m not saying into words, I feel better. See how it works?

Let’s see what I’m saying and not saying in my photos from yesterday.

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What I’m not saying about that last picture includes this:

  1. I’ve had that little book since I attended Berklee in the summer when I was in high school.
  2. Those notations include the melody line and some chords for my fourth original song, “Shameless Appeals for Applause.”
  3. When I was on a boat in Iceland recently, the man standing next to me was saying that he was proud of his son, who had recently graduated from Berklee.

What I’m not saying includes the fact that in the 1990s, I helped create Berklee College of Music’s recruitment video.  What I’m not saying is that I haven’t figured out a way to share that video here.

I’m not saying which of these “I’m Not Sayin'” performances I like best.

I’m not saying that those are three different songs but I am saying that I found all three on YouTube here, here, and here.

I’m not saying who wrote that song but you can find that out here.

What I’m not saying, until now, includes saying thanks to Gordon Lightfoot, The Replacements, Nico, Oscar, Harley, Berklee, Iceland, all those who are healing the best they can, and — of course! — YOU.

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

Day 793: Replacements

We all experience loss in our lives. For those we’ve lost, there are no real replacements. 

I need to replace the focus of this post, now, and tell you it’s the anniversary of the death of my father, who passed away in 1997.

While nobody could ever replace my father, I did re-place my father’s name — Aaron — on the birth certificate of my son, who was born a year after my father left this world.  

Yes, my father and his only grandson never met. I sometimes wish I could replace that reality with a different outcome. 

This might be a pale replacement for actually meeting his grandfather, but my son hears great stories about my father all the time, no matter where we go. Just last week in California, my friend and college roommate, Marcia, shared memories of my dad with me and his 17-year-old namesake. 

By writing  about my two irreplaceable  Aaron’s, I’ve replaced my original intent for this post, which was to show you these:



I ordered those pens online a few weeks ago, before I left for California. While none of them can replace this pen I’ve probably lost: 



… they can each make me smile, too. 

What other replacements can I place here, now?



Somebody is trying to replace our real experience of winter in Boston with an advertising campaign. 



This tissue box in one of my group therapy rooms is empty. I’ll be bringing in a replacement box, today. 



In a therapy group yesterday, we tried to replace self-blame with acceptance and love. 

Finally,







I am waiting for some warmer weather to replace some of this friggin’ snow. 

What might you place here for a replacement song? I’m ending with The Replacements performing “When It Began.”

If you can’t see that Replacement video, please re-place your cursor over to YouTube, where I found it. 

 Is there anything you’d like to replace, in this post or elsewhere?

Thanks to all those irreplaceables in my life, including my father, my son, and you, my wonderful readers. 

Categories: in memoriam, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , | 24 Comments

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