Day 3024: Pro (and con)-crastination

These days, many people in therapy are talking about procrastination.

Without procrastination, I’ll tell you why: People feel guilt and shame about not getting more done during the coronavirus pandemic when “I had so much more time on my hands!”

I wish people would stop procrastinating letting go of guilt and shame about procrastination. Procrastination is NOT a sin. Procrastination occurs when you

• have to do something you dislike doing,
• are focusing on the prospect of failure,
• don’t have the information or resources you need to complete the task, and/or
• are not at your best and think you would do a better job if you waited until you felt better.

When you consider that, it’s amazing any of us are getting ANYTHING done.

I’m now procrastinating sharing something I just realized. I not only procrastinate, I also do the opposite of procrastination, which I’m calling concrastination.

What is concrastination? It’s the need to do something immediately, without putting it off to a better time. I concrastinate the following:

• responding to emails, texts, and phone calls,
• meeting people’s expressed needs,
• trying to solve perceived problems,
• exploring new ideas,
• expressing my feelings, and
• creating blog posts after I wake up, even if it’s in the middle of the night.

Do you see procrastination or concrastination in any of today’s images?

Here is PROCRASTINATION – The Musical by AVbyte:

I’m concrastinating asking for comments, below, and expressing thanks to all who help me create these daily blogs, including YOU!

Day 2643: What are your priorities?

On this day, what are your priorities?

Do your priorities include taking care of tasks?

Do your priorities include noticing and appreciating what’s around you throughout the day?

Do your priorities include staying hydrated ?

Do your priorities include keeping track of what belongs to you?

Do your priorities include eating healthy food?

Do your priorities include socializing as best you can during these strange times?

Do your priorities include compassion, kindness, and grace?

Do your priorities include effective communication?

Do your priorities include smiling? Studies show that smiling helps improve your mood (even if you don’t feel like smiling).

Face it!  It can be very difficult to set priorities during changing and uncertain times. My priorities, here and now, include

• blogging,
• arranging and conducting on-line therapy groups,
• forgiving myself for my mistakes,
• listening,
• communicating,
• accepting myself and others,
• balancing action with thought,
• hope,
• safety,
• letting go of judgment,
• letting go of worry,
• finding joy wherever I can,
• caring for myself and others as best I can, and
• music (here and here).

As always, my priorities include gratitude, so thanks to all who help me create these daily posts, including YOU.

Day 2638: What we can teach each other

Yesterday, I decided that our shy cat Harley could probably teach people a thing or two about social distancing, so I started taping this tutorial:

However, Harley didn’t teach the way I expected him to. Based on my past knowledge of Harley, I assume that Harley’s behavior was different because his best friend Michael was in the room.

This morning, when Michael was not in the room, I tried again:

Somebody can teach me something about how to hold the camera and Harley can teach us all this about social distancing:

• Maintain a distance of six feet from people.
• If somebody gets too close, move away, if possible.
• If not, ask the person to back off.

Harley also teaches us that fear can make us very catty.

What can these other recent images teach us?

That teabag can teach us that our strength is our own knowledge.

I hope our knowledge and our strength help us all get through this.  I look forward to the teachings in the comments section, below.

Thanks to all who teach and learn, including YOU!

Day 2609: No Filter

Do you know people who have no filter — who say whatever comes to mind?

I thought about people with no filter when I captured this image yesterday:

As I wrote here recently, when  I facilitate therapy groups, I filter my comments through the question of “Who is it for?”

As I’ve shared many times starting here, I do my best to filter my behavior through these three things:

1. Show up.
2. Be gentle.
3. Tell the truth.

Here are my mostly unfiltered photos from yesterday:

 

 

In my groups, I have no filter when I encourage people to be selfish (i.e., practice self-care) and to be in the moment.

Here‘s “No Filter” by Fifth Harmony:

No filter needed for your comments!

No filter for the gratitude I have towards all those who help me create this daily blog, including YOU.

 

Day 2528: I’m sick of _______

I’m sick of

• politics,

• trying to figure out my ring size,

• misspellings on signs,

• the high price of parking, and
• driving to work in the snow.

I’m NOT sick of

• people who are funny,

• helpful labels,

• cats,

• self-care,

•  Michael’s cooking,

• great music,

• your comments, and
• gratitude.

Day 2527: Essentials

I think clear communication is essential, so I’m essentially starting today’s blog post with a definition of essentials.

es·sen·tial
/əˈsen(t)SHəl/
noun
plural noun: essentials

a thing that is absolutely necessary.
“we had only the bare essentials in the way of gear”

the fundamental elements or characteristics of something.
“he was quick to grasp the essentials of an opponent’s argument”

Are you quick to grasp the essentials of a blog post from me?

What essentials do you see in my photographs?  I see the essentials of connection, loyalty, self-care, animals, and others.

It’s essential that I get to work on time, so I’m going to quickly finish this blog post with another essential for me — music. Last night, my essential fiancé and I danced to tunes that might become our essential song. It’s not essential that you listen to these (here and here on YouTube), but I hope you do.

 

What are your essentials?

Of course, gratitude is an essential here at The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally, so thanks to all who are essential in helping me create these daily posts, including YOU!

Day 2496: It’s that time of the year

It’s that time of the year for

• dressing up,
• holidays,
• traditions,
• changes,
• anniversaries,
• anxiety,
• comfort food,
• selfies,
• memories,
• celebrations,
• communication,
• complications,
• simplicity,
• faith,
• love,
• forgiveness,
• self-care,
• accepting all your feelings,
• balancing your needs with other people’s needs, and
• sharing photos.

It’s also that time of year for cats (at least around here) and music (here , here, and here on YouTube):

It’s always that time of the year for gratitude, so thanks to all who help me create timely posts, including YOU.

Day 2490: More self-care bingo

Today is the wedding anniversary of my late, great parents, so I definitely need more self-care bingo.

Luckily, in a Coping and Healing group yesterday we added more squares to our self-care bingo cards.

My new squares are

1. created something new,
2. laughed with somebody,
3. expressed my feelings,
4. took a walk,
5. ate something delicious,
6. spent time with an animal,
7. danced,
8. listened to music I love,
9. improved the moment,
10. observed just noticed,
11. acknowledged progress,
12. looked at something beautiful,
13. gave somebody a hug,
14. accessed a good memory,
15. was playful,
16. returned an email,
17. made a helpful call,
18. set a limit,
19. smiled at a stranger, and
20. expressed gratitude.

Bingo!

Here’s #14 (accessed a good memory):

Adding more photos to today’s post qualifies as #1 (created something new).  Are any of these photos examples of self-care bingo?

Part of my self care has been watching this video of the Washington Nationals (up 2-1 in the World Series) spreading “Baby Shark” fever.

Here’s #20 (expressed gratitude):

 

Day 2487: Self-Care Bingo

Yesterday, somebody who attends my Coping and Healing groups sent me the gift of Self-Care Bingo.

Because my Coping and Healing groups  focus on self-care, we played Self-Care Bingo in yesterday’s group.  I called “Bingo!” for the up-and-down middle row, because that day I had

• talked to a friend,
• listened to my body,
• stayed alive,
• took a break, and
• drank water.

Everybody in the group was able to call “Bingo” for an up-and-down, left-to-right, or diagonal row.

I asked the group if they could think about other squares to add to their own personal game of Self-Care Bingo.  I might add another row of

• listened to music,
• hung out with a nice animal,
• communed with nature,
• blogged, and
• took pictures.

I just searched YouTube for “Bingo Supremes” and found this:

How would you play Self-Care Bingo?

Here’s something else I’d add to my personal Self-Care Bingo card:

Expressed gratitude.

Bingo!

Day 2265: Exhausted

Even though I’m up for anything these days, sometimes I get exhausted, especially on Thursdays, when I

• work from 10 to 9,
• facilitate two therapy groups,
• orient new people for my groups,
• see several people for individual therapy,
• go to a meeting of social workers,
• have about 20 minutes for lunch,
• try to decide whether to look at or avoid the news,
• practice my  latest song, and
• practice self-care.

In one of those therapy groups, a person exhausted by a major and unexpected loss shared that she practices self care by taking breaks, even if it’s a break for a moment.  I wasn’t too exhausted to hear that she had learned that skill in my groups.

I was so exhausted by the end of the day  that I added a new emotion to the emotions chart on my door:

Here and now, I’m exhausted by the possibility that somebody might tell me that “exhausted” is not really an emotion.

Here and now, I’m NOT too exhausted to share my other photos from yesterday.

I hope you’re not too exhausted to share what exhausts you and what energizes you, in a comment below.

Here‘s the late and great Madeline Kahn singing about how exhausted she is in Mel Brooks‘s Blazing Saddles.

I’m never too exhausted to express my gratitude for all those who help me create these daily posts and — of course! — for YOU.