Here’s one of the antidotes:
Use Helpful Reminders. Use helpful phrases to challenge habitual distortions. For example, for mind-reading or fortune telling, remind yourself “I’m not psychic.” Make a list of other phrases that help you, such as “I am doing the best I can,” “One step at a time,” etc. Consider sticking these reminders where you can see them.
In therapy groups, I often put up a list of helpful phrases. The group members and I add to it, as we choose. In other words, the list is a work in progress (like everyone who comes to the groups).
I can remember a few of the phrases on that list, right now:
You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.
The pain of the loss is directly related to the importance of the connection.
Less is more.
That last one was easy for me to remember, because somebody suggested it last night.
Here’s why I’m writing about this topic, today.
I want to include, in this post, some helpful reminders that people have written to me, lately.
If you wish to “connect” with me, please do.
While you are observing the anniversary of your 1st [pacemaker] implant, is it possible to view it as a celebration ( not painful) of life…YOUR life…& your continued presence in my life and the life of your other readers & friends & family.
Take heart, Ann.
Thanks to all, for every helpful reminder, phrase, or thought. Quoted or not. Expressed or unexpressed.
Here’s one more phrase, before I end.
Rest in peace.
Rest in peace, John Kennedy.
Rest in peace, all those I love, who have passed on before me.
I want to use that phrase for the living, now.
Here’s my wish, for all my “readers & friends & family.” (And for me, too.)
May we all rest, in peace, while still here on this earth.
Not perfectly. Not all the time. But as best we can.
Thanks so much, for reading today.
- Found at ielenaa.tumblr.com
** Left to right: my father, my mother, Nell Zaitchik, Rabbi Samuel Zaitchik