You’re in for a treat today, if urine the mood for stinky puns.
Are you in, pee-ple?
Yesterday morning, as I was minding my pees and q’s, I was feeling a little pissed, about my heart.
Then, I became much more pissed when I realized that our cat (whose name begins with O, not P), had urinated, peed, and pissed all over the bottom of our bedroom closet.
Of course, I had to de-urinate, de-pee, and de-piss the closet, pronto, even though I had an early appointment about my heart.
Does this pissy post on my Facebook page sound pissed off?
Apparently, one of our cats tried to distract me from worrying about my heart by peeing everywhere in our closet. It worked.
Urine for some surprises, perhaps, when I tell you that:
- Melanie and I have worked together, through many pacemakers, for thirty years.
- I always feel less pissed after I talk with wonderful pee-ple like Melanie.
- Melanie showed me empeethy and understanding, as usual, which helped my heart feel much better.
Throughout the day, I felt pissy about these things:
- I could still imagine smelling that cat pee.
- Several pairs of my shoes are probably ruined because of urine, which is very pee-ving.
- I phoned pee-ple at the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota, and Dr. Warnes (who is the expert in pee-ple with my heart condition) is taking vacation the same week as my vacation in May, which is pee-ving, because now I’ll have to miss work to visit her.
- Dr. Warnes wants me to meet with a surgeon when I visit her in Minnesota, and surgeons are pee-ple who can piss me off.
Ready for some pissed photos from yesterday, pee-ple?
That last pissy picture shows our own personal Urinetown — the back porch containing everything Oscar has recently peed on.
Because personally, puns do NOT peeve me, here’s the subject heading of an email I sent to my doctors about my mixed feelings re: traveling all the way to the Mayo Clinic about my pissy heart:
Hold the Mayo?
Pissed off, peeple?
If urine the mood to mark this territory with a comment, I will not be pissed or peeved.
Many thanks to all people who pee, including those who helped me create this pissy and punny post and to those who are reading it, here and now.