Posts Tagged With: psychotherapy

Day 3669: Responding

Because I’m a psychotherapist, a blogger, and a denizen of Twitter, I spend a lot of time responding to others.

Sometimes I feel guilty that I’m not responding more quickly and completely to responses here and on Twitter, but I’m responding to guilt the way I suggest others respond — I’m letting go of it.

Lately, I’ve been responding better to people who respond differently than I do. For example, when my husband Michael and I saw the musical Preludes this weekend, we discovered we were responding very differently: I liked it and he disliked it. Instead of responding negatively to that, I accepted Michael’s viewpoint and was also able to stay with my positive feelings about the play. I have to admit it’s taken me many years to reach that evolved level of responding.

Because responding effectively and appropriately can be complicated, I tweeted this simple Daily Bitch resolution/solution yesterday:

Now I’m wondering how you’ll be responding to that and the other images in today’s blog post.

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The Daily Bitch seems to be letting go of guilt about how she’s been responding.

Here are musicians responding to each other in the movie Whiplash.

Thanks to all who are responding to this blog post here and now, including YOU!

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Day 3548: Still alive

Despite the many close calls I’ve had since I was born in 1953 with a very unusual heart, I’m still alive to blog another day and to share my latest images with you.

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Tomorrow (which is National Talk Like a Pirate and National Butterscotch Day), this wife will be working from home providing psychotherapy for people who are still alive. (Usually I’m in-person at the hospital on Mondays, but since I’m still alive after my T.I.A. last week, staying home seems like the smart thing to do.) Because my love of group therapy is still alive, my plan is to keep doing this work for as long as I’m still alive.

Here’s what I find on YouTube when I search for “still alive.“

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As long as I’m still alive, I’ll be expressing gratitude for YOU.

Categories: adult congenital heart, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Day 3389: Coincidence?

Is it a coincidence that I’m starting off this blog post with a definition of coincidence?

For weeks, I’ve been considering asking a question about coincidences on Twitter, but the time just didn’t seem right. Here’s the question I finally asked last night:

I don’t know if it’s a coincidence, but several people replied that there was no such thing as coincidences. A lot of people told stories that reminded me of coincidences in my life.

Do you see coincidences in my images for today?

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Is it a coincidence that I’m writing about coincidences on For Twelve Day when there are so many coincidences about the number 12?

Is it a coincidence that I find this on YouTube when I search for “coincidence?”

I’m grateful for all the coincidences and dances that coincided for everyone to be here now, including YOU!

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Day 2282: Your favorites here!

When I was grocery shopping yesterday with one of my favorites (my boyfriend Michael from Boston), I saw this sign:

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My favorites are here, there, and everywhere.   Where are your favorites?

Some favorite thoughts about favorites are here!

  • It’s helpful to write a list of favorites — also called “a gratitude list.”  It’s one of my favorite ways to improve somebody’s mood.
  • It’s NOT helpful for parents to play favorites among their children.
  • Favorites is spelled “Favourites” in the United Kingdom.
  • Yesterday, one of my favorite people, who has the same kind of unusual heart as one of your favorite bloggers, asked me to be on one of his favorite podcasts about congenital heart conditions.
  • Last week, I started writing another original song about a favorite subject  (“Comfort”)  which I hope will be one of your favorites.
  • This past weekend, my favorite Michael and I watched the latest film by our favorites the Coen brothers and now The Ballad of Buster Scruggs is one of my favorites.
  • April is one of my favorite months, even though  one of my favorite poets — T. S. Eliot — said it was the cruelest one.
  • I encourage people not to play favorites with their feelings, but to accept all of them.
  • I try to capture favorite images every day with my camera and my latest ones are here!

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One of m favorites, these days, is dancing to favorite songs with my favorite Michael.  One of my favorite songs for dancing is here!

It’s not peculiar that I’m ending this post with thanks to all who helped me create it and (of course!) to you, because that’s one of my favorite things to do!

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 22 Comments

Day 1942: Obviously

Obviously, sometimes people are going to say things you obviously don’t want to hear.

Yesterday, somebody in therapy was obviously perturbed about people expressing unsolicited and often indirect opinions about what they obviously thought she should do.

Obviously, we  made a list of how she could reply.

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Obviously,  having a list of possible replies to upsetting comments can help reduce stress.

Obviously, I like to take photos and share them with my readers.

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What’s obvious about those photos, to you?

Obviously,  my handwriting is difficult to read, so it might not be obvious that we talked, wrote, and drew about dreams in a therapy group yesterday.  Obviously, it would be helpful if I typed what I wrote.

DREAMS

When I was a child, I had a dream I didn’t want to wake up from. It was so beautiful and soothing and cool.  Magical land with lots of colors — pastels.  (I was) walking or riding down a road. Not like nature, not “normal” but safe and sweet and lovely. Trees and structures

I was never able to dream that again.

However, many years later I was at Disney World on a ride about imagination and one of the parts of the ride looked like my dream.

Obviously, I enjoyed that ride at Disney World.

Obviously, “The Obvious Child” by Paul Simon is a great song to include here.

Obviously,  I’d like to know your reactions to this post

Obviously, I gather and share gratitude in this blog, even if the words aren’t always completely obvious.

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Day 1837: SAD

What is your first association with SAD?

My first association with SAD these days is that it’s a negative and judgmental way to end a tweet. SAD.

My second association, these days, is Seasonal Affective Disorder, which is

a type of depression that’s related to changes in seasons — SAD begins and ends at about the same times every year. If you’re like most people with SAD, your symptoms start in the fall and continue into the winter months, sapping your energy and making you feel moody. Less often, SAD causes depression in the spring or early summer.

Treatment for SAD may include light therapy (phototherapy), medications and psychotherapy.

Don’t brush off that yearly feeling as simply a case of the “winter blues” or a seasonal funk that you have to tough out on your own. Take steps to keep your mood and motivation steady throughout the year.

I’m happy to quote the Mayo Clinic, above, about SAD.  I’m sad to report that many people I know are currently dealing with Seasonal Affective Disorder. I may have some SADness, too, because I struggle to keep my mood and motivation steady during this time of year.

The steps I take to keep my mood and motivation steady include

  • sharing my thoughts and feelings,
  • helping others,
  • eating healthy and comforting food,

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  • avoiding snow and ice,

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  • being inspired by others,

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  • seeking light wherever I can find it,

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At least, Lana Del Rey’s “Summertime Sadness” reminds me that summer is on the way.

Yesterday, in my therapy group, people talked about making gratitude lists to help themselves feel less sad.  My gratitude list includes all those who helped me create this SAD post and — of course! — YOU.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

Day 1824: Why am I feeling this way?

Why am I feeling this way?

Yesterday, somebody in therapy asked that question and then another question about feelings. Because of the way I was feeling, I wrote both questions up on the board.

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Now, I’m going to ask myself those two questions.

Why am I feeling this way?

I’m not sure.  It could be the extreme cold, the lack of light, this time of  year, the news, politics, pain I feel when I use my dominant arm, and awareness of other people’s suffering.

What is this feeling?

I’m not sure. It’s probably a mixture of fear, sadness, anger, and empathy.

Now I’m going to ask myself those two important questions, again.

Why am I feeling this way?

I’m not sure. It could be my son, my partner, my family and friends, my work, my blogging community, my home, our cats, and awareness of my other blessings.

What is this feeling?

I’m not sure. It’s probably a mixture of gratitude, happiness, and hope.

Why am I feeling that it helps to ask those questions? Because of my experience.

Why am I feeling this way about these photos?

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What is this feeling? I’m not sure.  Is “Stop and Smell the Roses” a feeling?

Why am I feeling this way about this video?

What is this feeling?  It’s gratitude for all who helped me create this post and — of course! — for YOU.

 

 

Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

Day 1682: Imperfections

Yesterday,  in my office, two imperfect human beings discussed imperfections.  We talked about how people look in the mirror and focus  only on imperfections, ignoring the positives that others seem to observe. I suggested the practice of accepting and loving oneself, imperfections and all.

Do you see any imperfections in my photos from yesterday?

 

 

 

 

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Yesterday, I said imperfectly, “Nobody puts Ann in a corner.” I think we’ve established that we can’t say the same about Carl.

Here are some perfect imperfections from YouTube:

Imperfectly perfect thanks to those who helped me create today’s post with all its imperfections.  All of me thanks all of you, here and now.

 

 

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Day 1656: Holding on

I’m holding on to many things as we pack up to move, including

  • my sense of humor,
  • things I find valuable,
  • my job,
  • creatures I love,
  • my thoughts,
  • my feelings,
  • my sanity, and
  • my iPhone, so I can be put on hold and also take pictures of my holdings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Before I started writing today’s blog post, I got a little ferklempt at the end of this excerpt from last night’s Jimmy Kimmel Show (which is holding on here at YouTube):

 

As always, I’m holding on to gratitude for all those who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — for you, who keep me holding on.

 

 

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

Day 1593: Fake it ’til you make it

Don’t worry. I’m not going to fake anything in this post. However, I did make it to Wikipedia for an explanation of “Fake it ’til you make it.”

“Fake it ’til you make it” (also called “act as if”) is a common catchphrase. The purpose of “fake it to you make it” is that by imitating confidence, competence, and an optimistic mindset, with the hope that it leads to realization of that imitation in an individual’s life.

The phrase, “Fake it till you make it,” is very similar to the idea of Aristotle that to be virtuous one must act as a virtuous person would act. Although Aristotle did not have actual evidence of this, he was wise enough to come to the conclusion that acting as if you were something could lead you to become something.

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In some cases “fake it until you make it” it may be recommended as a therapy technique for combating depression. In this case, the idea is to go through the routines of life imitating as if one were enjoying it. Although it feels forced in the beginning, by continuing to engaged in this behavior eventually it will become real. This is an example of a positive feedback loop (Based on the research of Francesca Gino, Maryam Kouchaki and Adam D. Galinsky.)

The phrase is often mostly associated with Alcoholics Anonymous although it does not appear in either of the books that form the foundation of the AA program, Alcoholics Anonymous or The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.

I don’t know who makes those Wikipedia descriptions.

Do you ever fake it ’til you make it?

I won’t fake the fact that I have used that catchphrase in individual therapy and group therapy. “Fake it ’til you make it” is an invitation to practice more helpful thoughts and behaviors,  even though those thoughts and behaviors might feel new, unfamiliar, and therefore “fake.”

I also won’t fake the main reason I am quoting that catch phrase today.  The news makes me make this declaration:   We in the United States  have a president who — unprecedentedly  and un-president-ally — is faking it until he makes it. This kind of faking it ’til you make it makes me have many worries, concerns, fears, and other unfaked feelings.

I’m not faking it.  I read this before I started making this fake-it-’til-you-make-it post:

Look: We have known this since the campaign, but every once in a while it’s worth stopping and saying it. On issue after issue, Trump sounds like a student who vaguely recognizes a few phrases and is repeating them until the next student is called upon.

Here are some non-faked photographs I made yesterday:

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I can’t fake it — there are MANY Fake It ‘Til You Make It’s on YouTube. Here’s the one that’s making it to this post:

 

Please don’t fake it — make some comments below.

Non-fake thanks to all who help me make this blog and — of course! — to you, for making it through today’s post.

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , | 35 Comments

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