Posts Tagged With: positive self talk

Day 2776: Silently Correcting

I am not going to be silent about the correct inspiration behind today’s blog post title.

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I have to admit that I have been like that Daily Bitch, silently correcting some people’s

However, as I discussed in a recent post — Day 2791: Reasons you should speak up  — the time for silence is past!  Therefore, this morning, I got up the courage to stop silently correcting certain procedures at work, and I sent an email naming the problem and suggesting ways to move forward.  People may silently or not-so-silently correct my email, but why should I care about that?

Do you see any silent correcting in today’s other photos?

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That last photo reminds me of Harley not-so-silently correcting me when I made this video in March about social distancing, starring Harley and our late kitty Oscar:

I’m wondering now if anybody is silently correcting my camera angles for that video.

In my Coping and Healing groups, we talk about the toll it takes when we excessively silently correct ourselves for our thoughts and feelings.  Yesterday, several of us resolved to silent our harsh internal critics, as best we can.  When you are silently and painfully correcting yourself, try this  positive self-talk, as suggested by Alyssa Mairanz, LMHC:

  • turn “I am such a screw-up” into “I am doing my best, and that is enough.”
  • turn “I am so messed up. What’s wrong with me?” into “I am human and no one is perfect.”
  • turn “I don’t deserve happiness” into “I deserve to be treated with respect.”
  • turn “I can never get anything right” into “I am not defined by my mistakes.”

Please don’t worry about anybody silently correcting your grammar (or anything else) when you leave a comment, below.

I am correctly non-silent about my gratitude to all, including YOU.

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Categories: life during the pandemic, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

Day 1126: You can’t be good at everything

The title of this post

You can’t be good at everything

is something my ex-business partner, Jonathan, said to me when I was being self-critical about a task I wasn’t good at, decades ago.  My memory — which can’t be good at everything — tells me Jonathan said

You can’t be good at everything

when I was feeling shame about my living space being cluttered and not “guest-ready. ”

At various points in my life, it’s been helpful for me to say to myself

You can’t be good at everything

about other things, including

  • doing my taxes
  • drawing
  • penmanship
  • cleaning
  • maneuvering gracefully around other people while walking
  • keeping my cat away from my laptop
  • calculus
  • being a perfect mother
  • singing loudly
  • discussing politics
  • keeping my hair neat all the time

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  • and many more.

Sometimes, I seem to think that I SHOULD be good at everything, but I hope my readers know that being good at everything  is completely impossible, even if somebody wrote this in your 9th grade yearbook:

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You can’t be good at everything, even if you encounter a kind person like Roger sometime in your life.

I can’t be good at everything, including capturing all the wonderful images around me, every single day.  For example, yesterday I took only these three shots:

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You can’t be good at everything, but I hope you’re good at leaving good-enough comments for this blog.

Good thanks to Jonathan, Roger, my neighbor Karen (for the custom-made bumper sticker on her car), and all the other good people who helped me create this post. Also, great thanks to you — of course! — for reading this, here and now.

 

Categories: personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , | 56 Comments

Day 1010: I talk to myself

If you — like lots of other people — have automatic negative thoughts, some therapists recommend that you talk to yourself.

Here are some examples of how I talk to myself, challenging habitual and unhelpful thoughts:

That person seems to have a negative opinion about me BUT I ACTUALLY DON’T KNOW THAT.

If that person has a negative opinion about me IT WON’T HURT ME AS MUCH AS I FEAR.

My writing sucks right now BUT IT’S GOOD ENOUGH, AND I CAN MAKE IT BETTER.

I feel like I look really weird BUT NOBODY NOTICES THAT.

I’ve made a mistake BUT IT’S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.

I may feel like I’m alone with this problem BUT I CAN ASK FOR HELP.

I just talked to myself and told myself those were enough examples.

If you have this thought:

People are going to think I’m nuts if I’m talking to myself!

… take a look around and talk to yourself like so:

Don’t most people look like they’re talking to themselves, these days?

And who cares what they think, anyway?!?!?!

Can you imagine how I was talking to myself, yesterday, as I was taking these pictures?

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Now, I’m talking to myself about what music to include in this post.

There’s this, with Clint Eastwood singing to himself:

And there’s this, with the Smothers Brothers talking to (1) Judy Garland, (2) themselves, (3) each other, and (4) a TV audience:

Don’t talk to yourself about this post; instead, share that self-talk in a comment.

I talk to myself all the time about how grateful I am to have this blog. Today is no exception! Talk to yourselves, please, about how much I appreciate you for visiting here today.

Categories: blogging, personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: , , , , , , , | 56 Comments

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