Posts Tagged With: List of what helps

Day 2363: You can’t change other people’s behaviors


You can’t change other people’s behaviors.  You can only change your reactions to them and/or your own behaviors.

You can’t change my behaviors, including

  • blogging daily,
  • working hard, and
  • sharing my photos, including these:













I can’t change Michael’s behaviors, which include monogramming my slice of left-over gelato cake last night.

You can’t change my flying to Chicago today to spend the weekend with group therapists from the American Group Psychotherapy Association, but you can wish me a safe trip.

We can’t change Brian Wilson‘s behaviors, but we can wish him a happy belated birthday and appreciate his music.


Keep an eye on summer, because it begins today!

I can’t change your commenting behaviors, but I’ll appreciate any comment you leave.



Categories: group therapy, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Day 371: Something to look forward to

Someone I know just wrote this post on Facebook: “Lunch on Wednesday? I need something to look forward to.”

Don’t we all.

Yes, I write and talk to people about being in the moment, about letting go of expectations, investments, and other future-oriented thoughts.

But studies* also show that people need to have hope about the future. When times are challenging, especially, it helps to know something good is coming up.

I’m thinking about these challenging times this morning:

  • Students returning to school, after a long vacation.
  • People returning to work, after time off.
  • Dealing with medical issues.
  • Dealing with uncertainties.

In the past, here are some things I’ve looked forward to, that have helped with challenging times:

  • Getting a cat.
  • Seeing a musical.
  • Going to a movie.
  • Going out to a restaurant.
  • Communicating with a friend (on the phone, through mail**,  or in person).
  • Having time to myself, when I can sing and dance with nobody watching.

I have vivid memories of how it helped to look forward to all those things, when I was a kid.

And I’ve looked forward to those things recently, too. And, guess what?  All of those wishes have come true, within the last couple of months!

So that list includes the far past, the near past, AND things I can look forward to in the near future, too.***

Knowing all that helps, this morning.

That list also reminds me of a much bigger list, hanging in my office, that people have been adding to for over a year:


Right now, I can look forward to seeing that list, very soon.

Before I end this post, I also wanted to introduce you to somebody I met over the weekend:


That’s Dorothy Oja, She works at a very cool boutique, Thirty Petals. She’s an astrologer and an artist (that calendar in front has her artwork in it). She told me, “I’d be on the computer or the phone all the time if I didn’t get out,” and eight years ago, she started working at the store after she saw a Help Wanted sign in the window. She loves working there. She’s very interested in writing and artists. She told me she was one of the first people to create an email newsletter, which she’s been writing steadily for 16 years, and she seemed delighted when I told her about my blog.

That’s something else I look forward to. Meeting kind, interesting people.

Thanks to my Facebook friend, to Dorothy Oja, to all those who are looking forward to something and to you, especially, for visiting today.

* Perhaps you thought this footnote would include some sort of citation of real data. It doesn’t.

** Yesterday, I wrote about mail-related anxieties. However, there have been many times where I’ve really looked forward to getting mail.

*** The least likely one to come true in the near future is getting another cat. Although, who knows? And, just to review, here’s the current cat tally:

IMG_2527    +   IMG_2537  =  TWO

Categories: inspiration, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , | 40 Comments

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