Day 2132: Judgment Day

It’s judgment day here at The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally.

Why?  Because I observed references to judgment day within the last two days, near the same spot.

Today is also judgment day because I’ll be singing a new original song at an Open Mic tonight, and someone is sure to be judging that.

Any judgment about these other recent photos?

 

Today —  as I have for the last two thousand, one hundred, and thirty-one days of blogging — I am going to invite myself and others to let go of judgment and just be in the moment.

Here’s A.J. Croce with “Judgement Day.”

If I’m late to work today, there will be judgment, so I’m going to quickly end this post with gratitude to all, including YOU!

 

 

 

Day 2014: How do you stop catastrophizing?

When there are so many catastrophes around, how do you stop catastrophizing?

Do you share what you observe?

When the cupboard is bare, do you stock it?

Do you imagine a world without cancer?

Do you keep calm and carry on?

Do you get in touch with your strengths?

Do you change your life?

Do you try to see your way through all the clutter?

Do you let go of judgment and cognitive distortions, focusing on what helps?

Do you try meditation?

Do you turn to music?

Do you share your catastrophizing with other people?

Do you forgive yourself and others for mistakes? Do you gird yourself for the next catastrophe? Or, do you focus on gratitude?

Day 1997: Showing Up

Showing up today, I notice that I wrote another post titled “Showing  Up”  at the beginning of this year.

I also notice there are twice as many likes showing up for that post than for my posts that have been showing up here lately. Much to my surprise, self-doubt and judgment are not showing up about that.

Here’s why this topic is showing up again today:

Yesterday, in a therapy group, the people who showed up expressed appreciation and gratitude for others showing up.

Let’s see what other photos have been showing up on my iPhone.

Beautiful sunsets keep showing up near where I live.

Because I have to keep showing up at Physical Therapy on Wednesday mornings at 7:30 AM, I only have time to thank you for showing up, here and now.

Day 1784: Judging You

One of the interns at work —  who knows I write a blog about letting go of judgment and who I hope is not judging me about that —  showed me this last week:

Are you judging those “judging you” socks?

When I talk to people about joining my “Coping and Healing”  groups, I sometimes say

Judging is something we humans do.   I won’t be judging you about that. Please pay attention to harsh self-judgment and try judging you less.

Right now, I’m judging you, Michael, for not emailing  me those photos for today’s blog, which included cupcakes that looked like dogs.  I’m letting go of judging you, Michael, and I’m also letting go of judging me for not taking my phone with me yesterday when we visited a craft show benefiting a local animal shelter.

Don’t judge me for finding this video when I searched for “Judging You” on YouTube:

 

While cats may be judging you, I’m still thankful for cats, for Michael, for Vivian the intern, and for this one photo I took yesterday evening.

 

Day 1719: Distractions

I will try to avoid and ignore distractions as I write this blog post on “Distractions.”

Actually, aren’t writing and also reading blog posts distractions themselves?

Last night, in a therapy group, people who were somewhat distracted focused on the topic of “Distractions.”

I wrote more, last night, about distractions, including compiling a distracting list of “bad” and “good” distractions.  I’m not too distracted to remember that my list of good distractions included taking photographs.

 

Phones appeared on most people’s descriptions of distractions.   I wrote that any “good” distraction can turn into a “bad”distraction if we can’t control it.

Music was also on my list of “good” distractions. When I walk to and from work, I distract myself by listening to music.  This distracting music showed up yesterday:

Distractions can help relieve AND also add to anxiety.  Sudden endings can be distractions, too.

Also, I tried to record the sounds and sights of the ocean last weekend and then was too distracted to share that brief clip.  I hope this is a good distraction.

If you’re not too distracted, consider sharing your thoughts and feelings about distractions below.

Nothing can distract me from thanking all who help me write these distracting blog posts and — of course! — YOU.

 

Day 1477: You are not a fool of the cosmos

Last night, when my car inexplicably would not start,  I momentarily felt like a fool of the cosmos.

However, while I was waiting for the tow truck to arrive, I picked up this book …

… and read the following quote:

“When I think about all the bad stuff in my life, I feel I’m just a goddam fool of the cosmos! It’s humiliating! On a sidewalk crowded with people, I’m the one who’s  stepped in the dog poop. No one else is as stupid or unlucky as I am. The problem is: how can I go forward, how can I trust the future if I feel I am this stupid unlucky guy?”

When I read that passage aloud to my boyfriend, Michael, I did not feel like a fool of the cosmos.

When the tow truck arrived  and my car started up IMMEDIATELY for that guy, I did not feel like a fool of the cosmos.

When I drive my car in to my local Honda dealership and explain what happened, I refuse to feel like a fool of the universe.

I am not a fool of the cosmos for  writing “fool of the universe,” above.   I know I did that because “fool” sounds like “fluke” and I remember the National Lampoon’s “Deteriorata”

… which is a spoof of the 1970’s spoken-word hit “Desiderata.”

 

I am not a fool of the cosmos for taking these photos yesterday.

Thanks to all the children of the universe who helped me create today’s post and to you — of course! — for being here and now in the cosmos, with me.

Day 1332: No judgement here!

With a blog named The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally,  I tend to notice signs of non-judgment.

No judgement here about the spelling of “judgment”; dictionaries judge that either spelling  is okay.

I’ve been working on “no judgement” here in the beautiful city of Edinburgh, Scotland.  I judge that “no judgment”  is very difficult, especially regarding myself. Judging myself (and expecting others to judge me) is second nature and very difficult to give up.  No judgement here about that;  I, a psychotherapist,  see excessive self-judgement in others all the time.

In my judgement, we self-judging people would feel much better if we practiced “no judgement” here, there, and everywhere.

Any judgement about this post so far? If  there is, no judgement here about that.  Human beings are natural judgers.  We just need to judge ourselves and others more kindly.

Any judgement here regarding my other photos from yesterday?

 

 

 

No judgement here about cat cafés:

 

Thinking of leaving judgement in a comment?  No judgement here!

Thanks to all who helped me create this no-judgement-here post and to you — of course! — for being here, now.

Day 1322: It’s not me

It’s not me who came up with this idea for a t-shirt:

It was my co-worker and friend, Megan (pronounced Mee-gan) AND me.

It’s not Megan who is writing this blog post, it’s me.

It’s not me who

1. is supporting Donald Trump,
2. gets more than six hours of sleep every night,
3. has a normal heart,
4. chose to be sitting as far away as possible from my son on the first leg of our flight to Edinburgh Scotland later today,
5. designed a website for flight check-in that was so confusing I erroneously indicated I had “0 bags,”
6. wanted a five-hour lay-over in Ireland,
7. has an uncomplicated life,
8. never gets anxious,
9. is deliberately cruel to other living creatures, and
10. believes I can make it in this world alone.

It is me who

1. is working on radically accepting all those things I cannot change,
2. tries to live a healthy life,
3. loves my work as a group therapist,
4. appreciates my family and friends,
5. uses daily blogging as a kind of helpful meditation,
6. is excited about traveling to Edinburgh’s Festival Fringe with my son,
7. shows up every day, here and elsewhere,
8. is gentle with myself and others (whenever possible),
9. tells the truth,  and
10. took these photos yesterday:

Three little words could be:

1. It’s not me.
2. It is me.
3. I love you.
4. “Three Little Words”.

 

It is me who expresses gratitude at the end of every blog post:

Day 1300: Title

Why have I titled my post “Title” today?

Is it because:

• the title of today’s post has an impressive number?
• yesterday I went looking for the title of a car I want to donate to a charity with the title “Make a Wish Foundation” and I couldn’t find that title anywhere, even though I KNOW I saw that title a month ago?
• I used to title myself “stupid” or “loser” when I misplaced important things?
• how we title ourselves has a huge effect on how we behave and feel about ourselves?
• I choose the title “Ms.” when I fill out forms?
• I prefer the title “healthy” to “sick”?
• I saw a movie yesterday — “Ghostbusters” — with the same title of another movie I’ve watched many times?
• I believe every human being is as worthy as the next, no matter what each person’s title?
• many of the photos I took yesterday could be titled “Title”?

If you were going to choose a different title for today’s post, what would it be?  If you were going to choose some music for today’s post, what would the title of that song be?

Thanks to all who helped me create this titled post and to you for visiting today, no matter what your title is!

 

Day 1126: You can’t be good at everything

The title of this post

You can’t be good at everything

is something my ex-business partner, Jonathan, said to me when I was being self-critical about a task I wasn’t good at, decades ago.  My memory — which can’t be good at everything — tells me Jonathan said

You can’t be good at everything

when I was feeling shame about my living space being cluttered and not “guest-ready. ”

At various points in my life, it’s been helpful for me to say to myself

You can’t be good at everything

about other things, including

• doing my taxes
• drawing
• penmanship
• cleaning
• maneuvering gracefully around other people while walking
• keeping my cat away from my laptop
• calculus
• being a perfect mother
• singing loudly
• discussing politics
• keeping my hair neat all the time

• and many more.

Sometimes, I seem to think that I SHOULD be good at everything, but I hope my readers know that being good at everything  is completely impossible, even if somebody wrote this in your 9th grade yearbook:

You can’t be good at everything, even if you encounter a kind person like Roger sometime in your life.

I can’t be good at everything, including capturing all the wonderful images around me, every single day.  For example, yesterday I took only these three shots:

You can’t be good at everything, but I hope you’re good at leaving good-enough comments for this blog.

Good thanks to Jonathan, Roger, my neighbor Karen (for the custom-made bumper sticker on her car), and all the other good people who helped me create this post. Also, great thanks to you — of course! — for reading this, here and now.