Yesterday, somebody came into therapy feeling angry. This person was also
- judging the anger,
- questioning its validity,
- trying to squelch it, and
- redirecting it various places, including towards self.
Hmmmmm. Maybe I should have titled this post
What NOT to do with anger.
But who knows what to do with anger, one of the basic human emotions?
Who are our “anger role models” for effectively acknowledging and expressing this all-too-human feeling?
Can you think of any?
Uh-oh. I think the pressure’s on me, now, to come up with some ideas about What to Do With Anger.
Does that pressure make me angry?
I don’t think so. However, I did wake up angry today.
I wasn’t sure why and what to do with that feeling.
However, I did not
- judge the anger,
- question its validity,
- or redirect it.
Therefore, I can take now take a little time, before I leave for work, to understand that anger better.
I tell people in therapy, sometimes, that anger is the human reaction to not getting your needs met.
Am I getting my needs met, in my life?
Well, not ALL of them, for heaven’s sake. Who does?
I also tell people in therapy, sometimes, that anger is the human reaction to perceived unfairness and injustice.
Are there any unfairnesses or injustices I can see, if I look around?
Hmmmm. Now I’m wondering why I don’t wake up EVERY morning feeling anger.
Is writing this post helping me with my anger?
Actually, it is.
What else might I do with my anger, right now?
- Respect it.
- Assume it makes sense.
- Allow it to flow through me, like any other feeling (joy, for example).
- Express it as authentically and as respectfully as I can.
Is there anything else I want to express about my anger, this morning?
I suspect this anger is related to my having neither knowledge nor control, at this point, about some medical uncertainties in my life.
Are there any songs about anger out there?
If your needs aren’t being met by James Taylor singing “Angry Blues” and a Chubby Checker number, that’s on YouTube, here.
Do I have any angry images to show you?
Here’s all I’ve got, from yesterday’s photos:
I hope you know that all your feelings, thoughts, and reactions are welcomed here.
Not-so-angry thanks to James Taylor, Chubby Checker, and to everybody else who made this post possible (including boyfriend Michael, for dinner last night). Also, special thanks to you, for witnessing my feelings and thoughts, today.