Many people I work with in therapy have trouble forgiving themselves for past mistakes and transgressions. Yesterday, I gave somebody this assignment: to look themselves in the face (in a mirror, any other reflective surface, or, yesterday, during our ZOOM call) and say, “I forgive you.” We practiced that many times during the therapy session, with this person adding their name at the end of the self-forgiving statement.
I’ve been practicing that also, and it really helps. I forgive you, Ann, for
- being irritable with lots of people lately,
- your lapses in memory,
- repeating yourself,
- unintentionally hurting other people’s feelings,
- your internalized sexism, ageism, racism, and other isms,
- not being good at everything,
- not understanding everything,
- doing less walking yesterday because of the heat,
- taking only one photo outside yesterday,
- not getting a better shot of those ducks,
- eating meat in a restaurant last night,
- buying way too much Ferrero Rocher gelato,
- being a daily bitch,
- seeing monsters where they don’t exist,
- being a monster at times,
- having trust issues,
- scaring Harley just by moving too quickly,
- comparing Harley to your late, lamented kitty Oscar,
- repeating yourself, and
- spending too much time on Twitter.
I forgive you, Ann, for sharing this song for the umpteenth time.
I forgive you, Ann, for asking people to comment on your blog about their own experience with self-forgiveness.
I forgive you, Ann, for ending each blog in the same way, day after day.