Day 2853: Other people’s stories

As a psychotherapist, I love listening to other people’s stories.

What I DON’T love is other people who act like only their story is:

• real,
• legitimate, and
• worth listening to.

These days, more than ever, it’s important to make room for the stories that are not being heard. Why aren’t they being heard? Because people with power/the spotlight are

• loud,
• disrespectful of others,
• disinterested in the facts,
• obsessed with their own grievances,
• trying to hold on to power, and
• apparently not interested in other people’s stories.

If you do not leave room for other people’s stories, the dominant story becomes strident, repressive, demoralizing, inaccurate, and eventually obsolete. Personally, I am fighting for other people’s stories (including my own!) to be heard, so we can all survive together.

Here is one person’s photographic story for the day:

In my story, there is always room for the the Daily Bitch, love, AND your stories (in the comments section below).

Yesterday, when I was creating today’s photographic story, I heard the Prologue to Stephen Sondheim‘s Into the Woods, which includes lots of other people’s stories.

My stories always include gratitude for all who help me create these daily stories, including YOU.

Day 2630: People you’re stuck with

Yesterday I stuck this up on my white board at work:

We then made a list of people we were stuck with, including  family members, co-workers, neighbors, and the current President of the United States.

Who are the people you’re stuck with?  How do you deal with them?

Does it help to know that

• you’re not alone being stuck with people?
• you can try to limit your contact with the challenging people you’re stuck with?
• those people are stuck with difficult people too?
• you can focus on self-love and self-care even when you’re stuck with people?

Now you’re stuck with my other photos from yesterday.

 

I don’t mind being stuck with my husband Michael, who sticks healthy and delicious meals on our plates.

I also don’t mind being stuck in traffic listening to Bernadette Peters singing “Some People” from Gypsy:

Now I’m hoping some people stick some comments, below, about this “People You’re Stuck With” post.

Thanks for sticking with me, people, through so much!

 

Day 2607: Battles

This has been an interesting week here at The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally, with titles including Day 2605: I’m so done, Day 2606: Antisocial, and now Day 2607: Battles.

Is this blog turning into The Year(s) of Living Combatively?

I don’t think so, but I have noticed a lot of battles around me lately.  Do you see evidence of that in these photos?

 

I fell asleep on the couch last night and missed the anticipated battle between Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders at the latest debate of Democrat Presidential hopefuls.

Here‘s “Cabinet Battle #1” from Hamilton:

What are your thoughts and feelings about battles?

I need to battle traffic to get to work on time, so thanks to all who help me create this daily blog, including YOU.

 

 

Day 2529: Floundering

Because I had even more resistance to taking photos yesterday than I did the day before,  I was floundering about what to call today’s post.

“Floundering” seems right, because:

• our leaders are floundering,
• our institutions are floundering,
• many people tell me they are floundering, and
• this is the only photo I took yesterday:

That’s flounder over a peach and ginger flavored coulis with cous cous and al dente vegetables.  Michael’s cooking is a good remedy for floundering (although not for the flounder).

Today, I’m going to meet Mayor Pete Buttgieg, who doesn’t seem to be floundering even though he is running a distant fourth to Elizabeth Warren, Joe Biden, and Bernie Sanders in the polls (and poll results were certainly floundering in our last Presidential election). And speaking of polls, I don’t understand why Cory Booker is floundering with such low polling numbers, either.  These days, I’m floundering to make sense of many things.

Here‘s “Floundering” by Carly Simon:

 

“She seems to be floundering again,” sings Carly Simon, but I’m not floundering about how to end this blog post.

 

Day 2406: The conversations you didn’t know you needed

“The conversations you didn’t know you needed” could be part of an advertisement for group therapy.

It’s also a phrase I photographed between my two “Coping and Healing” groups yesterday.

Did you know you needed these conversations?

 

What about these conversations?

If you need another look at my “poetic”  conversation about family (pictured a few conversations above), here it is:

I’m going to try to write a poem about family,

It’s probably not going to be very grammarly,

Families are where we are born,

They can make us happy or forlorn,

You can pick your nose but you can’t pick your family.

Here’s a recap of some other important conversations photographed above:

Ignore the environment, it will go away …

The best things in life aren’t things …

Don’t compare your insides to other people’s outsides.

Never worry alone.

If you need important conversations about this blog post, please participate below.

I don’t know about you, but I always need conversations about gratitude, so thanks to all who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — to YOU.

Day 2312: Big thinking

I’m thinking that it’s time for some big thinking, especially when there’s so much small thinking from big people.

Here’s what’s got me thinking about big thinking:

Let’s build on big thinking by avoiding small and petty thinking.

Do you see any big thinking in my other photos from yesterday?

Here‘s an animated book review of  The Magic of Thinking Big.

Here‘s “Thinking Big” by Alumo.

I’m looking forward to some big thinking in some small comments, below.

Big thanks to all who helped me create this big thinking post and — of course! — to YOU!

Day 2244: Frustration

Yesterday, when I was experiencing some frustration, I noticed that somebody had chosen to express that feeling via the emotions chart on my office door.

I wondered, “Who expressed that frustration?  Was it a patient or a staff person? Why are they feeling frustration?  Are they expressing that frustration to others?  Are they keeping the frustration to themselves?  Do they know they are not alone in feeling frustration?  How do they deal with frustration?” I felt some frustration that I did not know  — and probably would never know — the answers to my questions.

However, I can ask similar questions to you, my readers.

Are you feeling frustration these days?   Do you share your frustration or keep it to yourself?  How do you deal with frustration?

I am feeling frustration with our government, these days.  Am I alone in that frustration?

Also, people in therapy have been expressing frustration about their relationship with food, especially during and after the holidays. I suggest that people NOT beat themselves up about what they’re eating– that leads to greater frustration and more eating to comfort themselves.

In addition, last night at a Board meeting, some of us expressed frustration about ageism, and how people — even those who are sensitive in their use of language about other differences — make jokes about age all the time.  I remember feeling frustration about this when I was in Social Work graduate school, decades ago.  Of course, my frustration with this gets worse as I get older.

After the board meeting, one of the participants shared this video in an email:

Is anybody feeling frustration that I’m taking so long to share my other photos from yesterday?

 

Are people feeling frustration about any of those photos?  I’ll explain the last one — I bought a gelato-filled Panettone for the board meeting.   Nobody expressed frustration about that.

Feel free to express frustration or any other feelings or thoughts in a comment, below.

Thanks to all who helped me create this “frustration” post and to you — of course!

Day 2136: What are you going to do today?

What are you going to do today?

Are you going to think about blue waves?

 

 

Are you going to bitch about things?

Are you going to live your life as if it actually mattered?

Are you going to watch USA election returns with your own eyes?

Are you going to be a flamingo in a world full of pigeons?

Are you going to eat food that’s good for you?

 

Today, I am going to do all those things AND I am going to VOTE!  Who’s going to join me?

I’m also going to share VOTING — the latest opus by Randy Rainbow.

 

Are you going to comment on this post today?

Another thing I’m going to do today: Thank everybody who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — YOU.

 

 

Day 2029: Leave

While I’ve already written several previous blog posts with “Leave” in the title (here, here, here,  here, and here), I couldn’t leave well enough alone, mostly because

1. I want a certain world leader to make like a tree and  leave and
2. I heard this song yesterday morning:

Because I don’t like to leave everything up to chance, I asked my son — who is leaving soon for India and then Edinburgh — to help me create a relevant image for today’s post.

If you don’t like posts with lots of photos, you should leave now.  If you don’t leave, you might notice that many of yesterday’s photos have to do with today’s title, in one way or another.

When I think a meeting is bullshit, I want to leave.

Now that we’ve found our new home by the sea, I never want to leave.

My son Aaron will soon be leaving on a jet plane.

Batman probably wants to leave the cat shelter as soon as possible.

Because I need to leave the house soon, I’ll leave it up to you to notice the connections with “leave” in the rest of my photos.

 

I wonder how many readers will leave this post before all the photos load?

Before I leave my blogging for the day, I want to leave thanks for all who helped me create today’s post and — of course! — for YOU.

Day 2028: Comparisons

Not to make comparisons, but I’ve written at least two previous posts about the cognitive distortion of comparisons (here and here).

Comparisons.
We compare ourselves to others, with ourselves coming out short. For example, “I’m not as smart (or good, competent, good-looking, lovable, etc.) as that other person.” Or, we compare ourselves to how we think we should be, or how we’ve been before. We might think that comparisons help motivate us, but they usually make us feel worse.

Yesterday, in a therapy group, we focused on comparisons.

I believe the human mind is built to make comparisons, in order to make meaning of what’s around us.  However, when we compare ourselves to others, the resulting blows to our self-confidence and self-esteem can be beyond compare.

I’ve been making a different type of comparison lately.  I compare the blog posts I’ve written after and before the November 2016 USA presidential election and I see differences. Less joy.  Less hope.  Less confidence in the future.  Less faith in humans to be respectful and kind.

Some might compare me to a snowflake.  Personally, I don’t mind being compared to a snowflake — each one is beautiful, intricate, and unique.

Let’s see how the rest of my photos compare to the one I’ve included above.

When I search YouTube for “comparisons,” most of the results have to do with money and wealth — not particularly useful comparisons.

If we don’t realize all animals are beyond compare, we will continue to lose more and more to extinction.  Here’s a video showing comparisons of animal size:

The most recent comment on that video includes this: “Fake news.” I now compare my life to how it was before I heard that phrase so frequently.

Here‘s one result for “comparisons music.”

I look forward to comparisons in comments, below.

Now it’s time to compare  two ways of my expressing gratitude to all who helped me create another “comparisons” post and — of course! — to YOU.