Day 3185: Adapting

Our cat Joan is adapting to her hard cone, even though she doesn’t like it.

I’m adapting to going into work in person on Mondays, even though I don’t like it. I’d much rather be working from home, especially as I’m helping Joan with her adapting. This is my second Monday since the start of the pandemic going into the Boston medical center where I work, and it’s definitely easier this time.

I guess we’re all adapting all the time.

Do you see adapting in my other images for today?

The Daily Bitch has an interesting way of adapting.

Here’s what I find on YouTube when I search for “adapting”:

How are you adapting these days?

Blogging and gratitude both help in my adapting, so thanks to all those who are adapting every day, including YOU!

Day 3070: How are you coping?

As usual, I am coping by connecting with others, so I just posted this on Twitter:

I’m also coping by creating safe spaces for group work, walking near the water, balancing my needs with others’ needs, taking photos, sharing images on social media, and — of course! — blogging. Do you see coping in my other images for today?

I am also coping by sharing the weird.

This is the first thing that shows up when I search for “How are you coping?” on YouTube:

Some coping strategies are timeless and universal.

How are you coping, my friends?

As always, I am coping by expressing gratitude, so thanks to all who are coping as best they can, including YOU!

Day 3047: Worst feelings

Yesterday in my therapy group, people shared worst feelings, including disappointment in oneself and disappointment in others. At the end of the group, members said that sharing those feelings and realizing they were not alone helped them feel better.

Do you see worst feelings, best feelings, and in-between feelings in today’s images?

Are you the master of your feelings, besides being the master of your judgments, decisions, and actions? Do you let ALL feelings flow through you, without judgment?

Speaking of feelings, here is the saddest song I’ve ever heard:

As I like to say in my group, all feelings are welcome.

One of the best feelings is gratitude, so thanks to all who visit this blog, including YOU.

Day 3030: Your calm place

Last week, in a Coping and Healing group, I did a mindfulness exercise where I invited people to go to a calm place — remembered, imagined, or where they actually were in the moment. Most of the calm places involved water.

My calm place was exactly where I was: my son’s old room, in front of a computer screen filled with group members. Using mindfulness — focusing on your breath and doing your best to be in the moment, accepting all your thoughts and constantly redirecting your attention to the here and now, letting go of judgment — your calm place can be exactly where you are.

I’m in my calm place here and now, creating this blog post for you and me. Do you see calm places in today’s images?

I’m in my calm place whenever I’m watching British competition shows like “The Great British Bake Off” and “The Great Pottery Throw Down”. Those shows, despite the constant possibility of disastrous results for the contestants, are so much more calming than American competition shows.

Here‘s what I find when I search YouTube for “your calm place.”

It’s challenging to get to your calm place when there is so much to be vigilant about, these days. Please help make this blog a calm place by leaving a comment about your calm place, below.

Gratitude helps make every place a calm place, so thanks to all who help me create this daily blogging place, including YOU.

Day 2994: This difficult time

Today’s blog post is inspired by the Daily Bitch, who helps me get through this difficult time.

During this difficult time, I will post my latest images.

During this difficult time, I’ve been facilitating five remote Coping and Healing groups each week and I’ll be adding a sixth one next Friday. In yesterday’s Coping and Healing group, I asked people who were experiencing this difficult time to use their sense of touch for a mindfulness exercise, focusing on something soft and comforting. I chose Harley’s favorite cat toy, pictured above.

I also suggested that people get through this difficult time by being especially kind to themselves.

Music helps me get through this difficult time. When I search YouTube for “Pat Metheny this difficult time,” I find this:

During this difficult time, it helps to believe that there are “Better Days Ahead.”

What are your thoughts and feelings about this difficult time?

During this difficult time, I am especially grateful for people like YOU.

For some unknown reason, I’m having this difficult time uploading and publishing this difficult time post. During this difficult time, I’ll just keep trying, while being especially kind to myself.

Day 2991: My idea of a good time

My idea of a good time is

• blogging first thing in the morning,
• providing group therapy to all who need it,
• going for walks,
• spending time with my husband Michael and other kind, loving, and funny people,
• spending time with animals and nature,
• balancing alone time with social time,
• balancing my needs with others’ needs,
• eating delicious, nutritious food,
• accepting all feelings,
• fighting injustice,
• identifying next achievable steps,
• learning new things,
• good music,
• good communication,
• letting go of regrets about the past and worries about the future,
• being in the moment,
• longer days filled with light, and
• capturing and sharing images.

My idea of a good time these days includes Twitter, in moderation.

Here’s “My Idea of a Good Time” by Mark Winkler:

My idea of a good time is asking you to share your ideas of a good time.

My idea of a good time is expressing gratitude to all who help me blog every day, including YOU.

Day 2874: I know things ordinary people don’t know

I know things ordinary people don’t know because I

• was born with a very unusual heart,
• grew up in an Orthodox Jewish household,
• had an incredibly funny, creative, and kind father, who loved to make people laugh,
• had an incredibly caring, kind, clean and neat mother, who loved to laugh,
• realized I had a connection with cats when I was very young,
• had my first major heart surgery when I was 10 on the day that President John F. Kennedy was assassinated,
• have relied on cardiac pacemakers to keep me alive since that day,
• spent a lot of time in hospitals where I met many different types of people,
• danced in our basement to musicals when nobody was watching,
• read voraciously when I was young,
• learned to play the piano, guitar, and ukulele,
• attended three schools where everyone there knew I had a heart condition,
• travelled across the USA by bus when I was 21,
• visited many different countries,
• danced, danced, danced in the 1970s even though my heart rate was fixed at 72 beats per minute,
• majored in English literature at college,
• worked as a technical writer, marketing writer, teacher, manager, and psychotherapist,
• volunteered for several years at a suicide hotline,
• attended graduate schools for film studies and social work,
• love hearing other people’s stories,
• married two extraordinary men,
• gave birth to an extraordinary son when I was 45 years old,
• saw people behave at their best and their worst and everything in between (including me),
• survived the coronavirus,
• have kept learning from all the people I have encountered in my long life, and
• have the Daily Bitch calendar, which knows a lot.

Can you tell that I know things ordinary people don’t know from the rest of today’s photos?

Harley knows things that ordinary cats don’t know, but he’s not telling.

It’s a good thing I know things that ordinary people don’t know, because I’ll be teaching several interns about my Coping and Healing groups this morning at 9.

Here is “I Know Things Now” from Into the Woods by Stephen Sondheim, whom I’ve known I’ve loved for a long, long time.

I also know gratitude that ordinary people don’t know, every day, so thanks to to all the extraordinary people I’ve known, including YOU!

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Day 2701: Alone in the presence of others

Seven years ago (but who’s counting?), I created and published my other lone daily blog post with the title “Alone in the presence of others.”

In the presence of others, here and now, I notice that earlier blog post

• focuses on group therapy,
• has no photos, and
• has no comments.

Since then, I’ve made a t-shirt that says,”Alone in the presence of others,” which seems even more relevant during these pandemic days.

We are always in the presence of others, even when we feel alone. There’s a beautiful group intervention about that in the incredible new series GROUP on YouTube. GROUP  features scripted characters, improvised interactions, and the renowned group therapist Elliot Ziesel, PhD as Dr. Ezra, the group leader. At the end of the first episode (at 14:31), there’s this exchange:

Karina: But the thing about unconditional love is that you can lose it.

Dr. Ezra: Unconditional love?

Karina:  Yes.

Dr. Ezra: How can you lose that?

Karina: My mother died.

Karina: You don’t continue to talk to her? She doesn’t continue to live inside you somewhere?

Karina: She does.

Dr. Ezra: She’s gone, but she’s not dead.

Yesterday, when I was alone in the presence of others, I …

• watched several episodes of GROUP,
• thought about my late mother and my late father,
• communicated with my lone child, Aaron, who is in the presence of others 3,068 miles away in Edinburgh, Scotland (but who’s counting?),
• told Aaron about GROUP, and
• took all these photos:

That delicious toasted quinoa was alone in the presence of others on my dinner plate last night, thanks to the presence of my dear husband Michael.

Would you like to be alone in the presence of others in the comments section, below?

Today’s expression of gratitude is alone in the presence of others.

 

 

Day 2148: Don’t miss the drama

Yesterday morning,  before leaving our dramatic New York City airbnb to attend the second and final day of a dramatic  group therapy conference, I didn’t miss the drama of this sign on the wall:

I didn’t miss the fact that  “Don’t miss the drama” was a perfect invitation for a day of learning, connection, and  participation in the human drama of group therapy.

In those groups, I learned, again, how the dramas, traumas, thoughts, feelings, and actions of all the individuals present can dramatically form and transform a group experience. I’m so glad I didn’t miss the drama of that group therapy conference, despite the drama of our traumatic drive from Boston to NYC through white-out conditions on Thursday night.

Don’t miss the drama in my other photos from yesterday.

Did you pick up or miss the dramatic thanks I’m giving to the Eastern Group Psychotherapy Society and everyone else who contributed to the wonderful drama of my days in New York? Also, don’t miss the drama of my thanks to you — of course! —  for participating in this blog.

Finally, don’t miss the drama of Marcelo Álvarez singing “Sperai, tanto il deliro” from Pagliacci:

Day 2147: Bravo!

At our Airbnb home-away-from-home in NYC, I noticed this on a signed photograph:

It says, “Bravo! Great voice!”

In the groups I observed and participated in yesterday (at the Eastern Group Psychotherapy Society annual conference), I heard variations of “Bravo!” when people were brave, authentic, went beneath the surface, and gave great voice to their thoughts and feelings.

What helped people do all this in those groups? Perhaps it was this clear message (which I saw at the church where the conference took place):

“You are safe here.”

Bravo!

Do any of my other photos from yesterday deserve a “Bravo!” ?

Here‘s the Goedicke Concert Etude, played by Julia Bravo:

Thanks to all who helped me create today’s post and — Bravo! — to YOU.