Day 2808: Character

Because of the kind of character I am, I’m going to start this blog post with a definition of “character.”

character

noun

char·​ac·​ter | \ ˈker-ik-tər , ˈka-rik- \

1a: one of the attributes or features that make up and distinguish an individual.
“This is a side of her character that few people have seen.”
b(1): a feature used to separate distinguishable things into categories.
advertising of a very primitive character
(2): the aggregate of distinctive qualities characteristic of a breed, strain, or type.
a wine of great character
(3): the detectable expression of the action of a gene or group of genes.
c: the complex of mental and ethical traits marking and often individualizing a person, group, or nation.
the character of the American people
d: main or essential nature especially as strongly marked and serving to distinguish.
excess sewage gradually changed the character of the lake
2a: one of the persons of a drama or novel.
b: the personality or part which an actor recreates.
an actress who can create a character convincingly
c: characterization especially in drama or fiction.
a novelist good in both character and setting.
d: PERSON, INDIVIDUAL
a suspicious character
e: a person marked by notable or conspicuous traits.
quite a character
3: moral excellence and firmness.
a man of sound character
4a: a graphic symbol (such as a hieroglyph or alphabet letter) used in writing or printing.
b: a symbol (such as a letter or number) that represents information.
mathematical characters
also : a representation of such a symbol that may be accepted by a computer.
c: a magical or astrological emblem.
d: ALPHABET
e(1): WRITING, PRINTING
(2): style of writing or printing.
You know the character to be your brother’s?
— Shakespeare
(3): CIPHER
f: a conventionalized graphic device placed on an object as an indication of ownership, origin, or relationship.
5: REPUTATION
the scandal has damaged his character and image
6: POSITION, CAPACITY
his character as a town official
7: REFERENCE sense 4b
8: a short literary sketch of the qualities of a social type
in character
: in accord with a person’s usual qualities or traits
behaving in character
out of character
: not in accord with a person’s usual qualities or traits
his rudeness was completely out of character

I tried to add and remove some characters to that long definition to make it clearer but, because I’m an impatient character, I gave up before the ending.

People we know of excellent character have sent us sweet condolence cards characterizing our late kitty Oscar as a character.

 

I so appreciate the loving character of Janet, Ray, Lydia, and Bob.

Harley, who has a more nervous character than Oscar did,  is sitting next to me on the sofa as I’m typing the characters in this post.

What character(s) do you notice in my other photos, which I will characterize as “recent”?

Here‘s “The Top 10 Movie Character Musical Themes.”

Here‘s somebody with character playing “The Imperial March” (#3 in the Top 10 Movie Character Musical Themes) during day 55 of the Black Lives Matter protests in Portland:

I look forward to all the characters left by various characters in the comments section, below.

Many thanks to all the characters who help me create this daily blog, including YOU!

 

 

 

Day 2802: Mixed messages

I’ve definitely heard mixed messages about the advisability of looking for information online, but here‘s an online definition of “mixed messages”:

NOUN
mixed message (plural mixed messages)

(idiomatic) Any communication that is contradictory, inconsistent, or unclear, especially in its motive or intent.
Don’t you think it’s sending a mixed message for the magazine to put “Lose Five Pounds in A Month” right next to “Ten Easy Desserts”?
See also
double standard
mixed signal
oxymoron
read between the lines

Yesterday, on a walk near my home, I encountered these mixed messages:

EXPLORE MORE (on the left page of that discarded magazine)  and

… NO TRESPASSING.   There were more mixed messages there, because several people and dogs seemed to be trespassing on that land  (which is either an island or a peninsula, depending on the tide). As I read descriptions of Thompson Island, I’m getting more mixed messages about whether I should have explored more or turned back in response to that NO TRESPASSING message.  The messages are so mixed for me right now, I’m doubting whether that actually IS Thompson Island, since there were no clear messages or identifying signs.

When I look around these days, I see mixed messages about

• masks,
• the pandemic,
• travel,
• work,
• age,
• food,
• sleep,
• etiquette,
• language,
• connecting with others,
• fireworks,
• protests,
• danger,
• safety,
• politics,
• polls,
• money,
• power,
• human nature,
• the climate,
• the future,
• the past, and
• the rest of this mixed world.

Do you see any mixed messages in my many other mixed photos from yesterday?

If those messages are too mixed to see clearly, you can always click on a particular photographic message to make it larger.

Here’s “Mixed Messages” by  Big K.R.I.T, …

… and “Mixed Messages” by The Bangles.

That’s a really interesting mix of “Mixed Messages.” Now I’m looking forward to reading the mix of messages in the comments section, below.

There’s always an unmixed message at the end of each of these mixed blog posts.

 

 

Day 2759: Way stations

I just found my way to an online way station that has a definition of “way station.”

---

way station (noun)

Definition of way station

1: a station set between principal stations on a line of travel (such as a railroad)
2: an intermediate stopping place

Synonyms

station, stop

Examples of way station in a Sentence

a way station for truck drivers

Recent Examples on the Web

The house became a gathering place for an indelible cultural moment, a way station for Andy Warhol, Terry Southern, Ike and Tina Turner, and Black Panthers.
— Mark Rozzo, The New Yorker, “Dennis Hopper’s Quiet Vision of Nineteen-Sixties Hollywood,” 22 Dec. 2019

---

In my way, I tried to make that definition of “way station” a way station (an intermediate stopping place) within today’s post.

I think it’s helpful, here and now, to think of every thing we experience — alone and together — as way stations on our way to where we are going.

Do you see any way stations in my photographs from yesterday?

 

As I’m moving among way stations, I often listen to The Way Up by the Pat Metheny Group. Here’s one performance of The Way Up from the way station YouTube:

 

On your way today to other way stations, I hope you spend some time listening to The Way Up and also in the way station of the comments sections, below.

No matter what the way station, I am grateful to be there and grateful for YOU.

 

Day 2755: Fragility

In my therapy groups and in my therapy group organization,  I am witnessing conversations about fragility (defined as “the quality of being easily broken or damaged”).

My experience is that focusing on the fragility of ourselves, other people, and established systems can lead to

• fear,
• resistance to change,
• avoidance of action, and
• silence.

Yesterday, during a conversation about racism in a racially diverse group, I brought up the concept of “white fragility,”  defined by Robin DiAngelo as follows:

White Fragility is a state in which even a minimum amount of racial stress becomes intolerable, triggering a range of defensive moves. These moves include
the outward display of emotions such as anger, fear, and guilt, and behaviors such
as argumentation, silence, and leaving the stress-inducing situation. These behaviors, in turn, function to reinstate white racial equilibrium. Racial stress results from an interruption to what is racially familiar.

I was the only person in this group who had heard the term “White Fragility.”  As we discussed the concept, people nodded and shared their experiences.

In group discussions, I often witness vulnerability, which Brené Brown describes  as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure” and the unstable feeling we get when we step out of our comfort zone or do something that forces us to loosen control.

It occurs to me now that fragility and vulnerability are two very different things, although both are, of course, human.

My hope is to face the future with more vulnerability and less fragility.

Do you see fragility or vulnerability in any of these recent photos?

 

When I search for “fragility” on YouTube, the second thing that comes up is this video by Newsbroke:

What are your thoughts and feelings about fragility, here and now?

Strong thanks to all who are reading this “Fragility” post today, including YOU!

 

 

Day 2742: Community

On June 13, I am going to be facilitating an online community meeting for an esteemed community of group therapists.

Here’s an online definition of community:

com·mu·ni·ty
/kəˈmyo͞onədē/

1. a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common.

2. a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.

As I’m looking at that definition, I’m thinking how important difference and diversity are (not just things shared in common) for enriching a community.

I’m planning on asking people questions during the online community meeting, like

1. What does community mean to you?
2. What gets in the way of community for you?
3. What helps you connect to a community?

I’d also like to share the poem “community” by rupi kaur, which was featured in my previous blog post about community:

when the world comes crashing at your feet

it’s okay to let others

help pick up the pieces

if we’re present to take part in your happiness

when your circumstances are great

we are more than capable

of sharing your pain

Here‘s a video on rupi kaur  from the community of the Sikh Foundation of Canada.

 

Do any of my photos from yesterday relate to community?

Because part of community is creating a safe enough space for others to participate, what are your thoughts and feelings about community?

I am grateful for all my communities, including this one!

 

Day 2717: Traceability

Traceability (according to this traceable point on the internet) is

The ability to trace (identify and measure) all the stages that led to a particular point in a process that consists of a chain of interrelated events.

Let’s see if we have the ability to trace (identify and measure) all the stages that led to this particular title in a process that consists of a chain of interrelated blog posts.

That’s it.  Today’s blog post title is traceable to that sign in a Whole Food Market, which I saw yesterday when Michael and I were doing our weekly food shopping.

After we shopped, removed our masks, and got into my traceably bright yellow car, Michael said, “That was stressful.  I used to enjoy food shopping.”   Michael’s comment has traceability — we are in a particular point in a process of a chain of interrelated pandemic events.

Do you see traceability in my other photos from yesterday?

My choice of video today has traceability back to my watching  Royal Wedding with Fred Astaire and Jane Powell yesterday.

Fred Astaire’s character dancing on the walls and ceiling has traceability from Sarah Churchill‘s character revealing earlier in Royal Wedding that she used to imagine she could dance all over the floors, walls and  “even the ceiling” when she was a child. Sarah Churchill’s lineage has traceability to her father, Winston Churchill.

So much traceability, so little time.

Today’s thanks — to everybody who helps me blog every day, (including YOU) —  have traceability to yesterday’s visit to Whole Foods, too.

Day 2713: Lectures

There will be no lectures, here and now  — just a sharing of information and images, like this one:

Please, no lectures about that button I made for a woman who has to  deal with a man who lectures her.  Instead, let’s look at this definition of lecture:

to criticize (someone) severely or angrily especially for personal failings

“the frustrated manager lectured the waitstaff about its poor level of service”

Synonyms for lecture

baste, bawl out, berate, call down, castigate, chastise, chew out, dress down, flay, hammer, jaw, keelhaul, lambaste (or lambast), rag, rail (at or against), rant (at), rate, ream (out), rebuke, reprimand, reproach, scold, score, tongue-lash, upbraid
Words Related to lecture

admonish, chide, remonstrate (with), reprove
abuse, assail, attack, bad-mouth, blame, blast, censure, condemn, criticize, crucify, denounce, dis (also diss) [slang], excoriate, fault, harangue, knock, lace (into), lash, pan, reprehend, revile, scourge, slam, vituperate
belittle, disparage, mock, put down
ridicule, scoff, scorn

Phrases synonymous with lecture

lay into, read the riot act (to), take to task

Near antonyms for lecture

approve, endorse (also indorse), sanction
extol (also extoll), laud, praise

Please, no lectures about my sharing the definition, synonyms, and antonyms for the verb form of the word “lecture” there.

Instead of lectures, I prefer

• action,
• help,
• thoughtfulness,
• kindness,
• empathy,
• awareness,
• understanding,
• listening,
• approval,
• endorsement,
• praise,
• openness,
• flexibility, and
• acceptance.

Who lectures you, these days?   Authority figures?  Family members? Acquaintances? YOURSELF?

How do those lectures affect you?  How do you deal with them?

If you wear a button like this about lectures …

… at least you’re being direct and polite.

No lectures about signing up for my socially distanced performance of “I Left the House Before I Felt Ready” tomorrow night between 7 – 9 PM, USA Eastern Time, but you do need to do that TODAY by using this link:

https://www.signupgenius.com/go/9040b4eadaa23a2f49-jamn2

Are there any lectures in my other photos from yesterday, when I left the house before I felt ready?

 

I didn’t hear any lectures in Buena Vista Social Club last night, but I did hear great music including this:

 

I look forward to your thoughts and feelings about lectures, below.

No lectures, just thanks to all who helped me create this “Lectures” post, including YOU.

 

Day 2666: Be careful what you wish for

My careful husband Michael, who is all that I could wish for, likes to say, “Be careful what you wish for.”

If you wish for a careful definition of that statement, here‘s one:

(be) careful what you wish for — idiom
Definition of (be) careful what you wish for
—used to tell people to think before they say that they want something and to suggest that they may not actually want it
You think having twins would be fun? Be careful what you wish for, you may just get it.

Over the past few months, I’ve often wished for

• more time at home,
• the chance to relax, and
• major changes in the current political situation.

Because of the COVID-19 pandemic, I’m getting what I wished for.  I guess I should have been careful.

I want to be careful in explaining what I’m currently wishing for, because it might sound bad. I’m wishing that if I had been tested for COVID-19 (which my doctors unsuccessfully wished for and asked for) when I was briefly hospitalized with fevers earlier this week, I would have tested positive.

Why am I wishing for THAT?  Because

• I’ve been self-quarantining,  so I know I’ve done my best to reduce the spread,
• I’d be immensely relieved to know that I survived the pandemic unscathed despite being in the major risk categories (age and underlying health issues), and
•  I would now be immune to the disease, according to my careful cardiologist, Dr. Deeb Salem.

Whether or not Dr. Salem wishes to be quoted in this blog,  he often is.  Here is an excerpt of his email to me this week after my release from the hospital:

It is criminal that we have not been able to test. It is really good to hear that you are better since anyone that has the illness and recovers should now be immune.

It looks like Dr. Salem also wishes that I would have tested positive for the illness, if testing had been available.

Be careful what photos you wish for, because you might get these:

Be careful what you wish for if you wish to eat pasta every day, because that’s what we’ve got!

For those of us who wished to see more of Mayor Pete Buttigieg this year, we got this …

…  this …

… and this:

It looks like Pete, a huge Star Trek fan, got what he wished for his first time guest hosting an American late night TV show.

Here‘s part of the classic be-careful-what-you-wish-for Twilight Zone episode, “Time Enough at Last”:

What I wish for now includes (1) comments and (2) the opportunity to express my gratitude for all who help me create these daily blog posts, including YOU!

Day 2629: Fresh on so many levels

Yesterday,  when I was fresh from a very good meeting with my cardiologist Dr. Deeb Salem, I saw this:

There so many levels of meaning for the word “fresh.”

FRESH adjective
\ ˈfresh \
Definition of fresh
1a : having its original qualities unimpaired: such as
(1): full of or renewed in vigor : REFRESHED
rose fresh from a good night’s sleep
(2): not stale, sour, or decayed
fresh bread
(3): not faded
lessons fresh in her memory
(4): not worn or rumpled
a fresh white shirt

b: not altered by processing
fresh vegetables
2a: not salt
fresh water
b(1): free from taint : PURE
fresh air
(2)of wind : moderately strong
a fresh breeze

3a(1): experienced, made, or received newly or anew
form fresh friendships
(2): ADDITIONAL, ANOTHER
a fresh start
b: ORIGINAL, VIVID
a fresh portrayal
c: lacking experience : RAW
coming fresh to the job
— Helen Howe
d: just come or arrived
fresh from school
e: having the milk flow recently established
a fresh cow
4[ probably by folk etymology from German frech] : disposed to take liberties : IMPUDENT
don’t get fresh with me
5 slang : FASHIONABLE, COOL

I hope my other photos in today’s fresh post  are fresh on so many levels.

Here‘s a song I remember that used the word “fresh”.

I’ll be looking for so many levels in your fresh comments, below.

I’m grateful on so many levels, here and now.

 

 

Day 2606: Antisocial

Is it antisocial to think,  every once in a while, “I’m so done with everyone and everything”?

Here’s a definition of “antisocial” I found on social media:

an·ti·so·cial
/ˌan(t)ēˈsōSHəl,ˌanˌtīˈsōSHəl/
adjective

1. contrary to the laws and customs of society; devoid of or antagonistic to sociable instincts or practices.
“a dangerous, unprincipled, antisocial type of man”
Similar:
objectionable
offensive
beyond the pale
unacceptable
unsocial
asocial
distasteful
disruptive
disorderly
lawless
rebellious
sociopathic
2. not sociable; not wanting the company of others.

I would say that, sometimes, I’m  not wanting the company of others, especially if they’re objectionable, offensive, beyond the pale, unacceptable unsocial, asocial, distasteful, disruptive, disorderly, lawless, rebellious, or sociopathic.

Does that make me antisocial?

Let’s see what my Daily Bitch Calendar says:

Are these other photos antisocial?

Even on days when I’m feeling a little antisocial, I also feel anti-antisocial or, more simply, social.

I don’t want to seem antisocial, but I need to end this antisocial post in order to get to work on time.

Before I do, here’s some antisocial music.

 

I’m never too antisocial to express my thanks to all who help me create and share this daily blog, including YOU.