Day 2924: What counts

Yesterday, USA Thanksgiving 2020, I spent part of the day counting and recounting the numbers in my blog posts. As you probably know, I’ve been counting the days in my post titles for many years. Even though I am careful to count accurately (because accuracy and truth count), none of us can count on perfection.

As I was counting past blogging days, I found I had lost count on a day when I was focusing on the loss of my friend, Eleanor, who counted very much to me and on whom I could always count. Once I found that error in the count, I did a recount and now, I think, the count is accurate. However, I wouldn’t completely count on it.

Besides fixing the blogging count, I spent much of Thanksgiving day telling people who count (including YOU) how thankful I am for them.

What counts in my photos from yesterday ?

When I was recounting my posts, I found some words that counted a lot, including that Turkish proverb on Turkey Day. I know I am not alone in counting the days until the Axe is no longer President of the USA.

For those of you who count on puns, now it’s time for me to axe for comments, below.

Here‘s “Count’s Place” with Count Basie and The Kansas City 7.

I count on you every day and thanks for helping me make every day count!

Day 2908: What we dwell on

Yesterday, when I was dwelling on Donald Trump, Donald Trump’s supporters, and angry people, I found this quote by Oprah Winfrey:

Oh no! Oprah knows for sure that I will become Donald Trump, a Donald Trump supporter, and/or an angry person unless I dwell on something else. Luckily, there are many other things to dwell on in my other photos from yesterday.

Uh-oh. Now I’m dwelling on the fact that we just lost our internet connection. Also, it’s taking forever for me to upload any more photos that are dwelling on my phone by using cellular data.

Now I’m dwelling on the possibility that if Donald Trump, Donald Trump supporters, and angry people want to take over my country with a coup, knocking out the internet of people dwelling in liberal parts of the USA is probably a great way to do that.

Now I’m dwelling on this: a coup in the USA is highly unlikely. Also, the photo I am trying to upload in this precious moment says “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.”

Rather than dwelling on worry, I choose to dwell on

• hope,
• quotes from wise people,
• people I love,
• people I trust,
• cats,
• dogs,
• the ocean,
• things that make me think,
• things that make me feel,
• things that make me laugh,
• delicious nutritious food,
• my health and the health of others,
• staying safe,
• music, and
• taking a walk on a beautiful morning.

Therefore, I am going to take a masked walk on this beautiful morning after sharing this one other photo which uploaded successfully:

Dwell on this: In 2019 I bet people cookies that Donald Trump would not win re-election. That box of Mallomars is part of my winnings, with more cookies on the way.

Because it helps me to dwell on music, I’m going to search YouTube for music that dwells there, as I peacefully accept that I can always share my other temporarily unload-able photos tomorrow.

Strangely enough, when I search YouTube for “what we dwell on”, I find another Game of Thrones video.

Now I’m dwelling on synchronicity and gratitude for all who help me dwell on blogging every day, including YOU!

Day 2902: Living with uncertainty

Living with uncertainty is very difficult, yet we do it every day. Certainty is often an illusion — a denial of mortality and the constant changes we are barely aware of.

Here and now, as we live with the uncertainties of the pandemic and the results of the USA election, the level of uncertainty is very difficult to live with. I’m certain how this uncertainty is affecting me, my family, my friends, and my patients:

• insomnia,
• changes in appetite,
• stress eating,
• anger,
• hopelessness,
• helplessness,
• worry,
• anxiety,
• depression,
• lack of motivation,
• a reversion to old unhelpful habits,
• withdrawal,
• fear,
• catastrophizing,
• blaming,
• all-or-nothing thinking,
• mind-reading, and
• the rest of the cognitive distortions (which I’m certain you can find here).

I’m uncertain how I and millions of other people are going to live with so much uncertainty in the days ahead.

In a sea of uncertainty, I’m certain that routines — like daily blogging — help. I’m certain I have new images to share but I’m uncertain exactly what they are.

I’m certain that I felt less uncertainty about the future when I took those photos than I’m feeling now.

Here‘s “The Courage to Live with Radical Uncertainty” — a Ted Talk given by “Compassion-Driven Oncologist Shekinah Elmore” in March 2020, right before our current age of uncertainty.

Here‘s “Coping with Uncertainty” by MindTools Videos:

What are your thoughts and feelings about living with uncertainty?

No matter how I’m living with uncertainty, I’m certainly grateful to all who help me create this daily blog, including YOU.

Day 2595: Attempts to be super

My attempts to be super at blogging this morning resulted in my finding this headline:

Moon attempts to be ‘super’ on Saturday night, settles for mediocrity

I think this is a super example of anthropomorphism (ascribing human characteristics to  non-human objects).

It might also be a super example of projection.   In attempts to be super in psychotherapy, we notice that when people see characteristics in others, that’s often a reflection of themselves.  Hence my super response to compliments: “It takes one to know one.”

In case you haven’t noticed, I’m trying to suggest that perhaps the writer of that headline attempted to be super and settled for mediocrity.

Let’s see if there are any attempts to be super in today’s photos.

Harley and Oscar sometimes attempt to be super tolerant of each other.

Here‘s super Stevie Wonder with “Superwoman.”

I’m looking forward to your super comments, below.

Here’s today’s attempt to show my super gratitude for YOU:

 

Day 2594: People you’re stuck with

Yesterday I stuck this up on my white board at work:

We then made a list of people we were stuck with, including  family members, co-workers, neighbors, and the current President of the United States.

Who are the people you’re stuck with?  How do you deal with them?

Does it help to know that

• you’re not alone being stuck with people?
• you can try to limit your contact with the challenging people you’re stuck with?
• those people are stuck with difficult people too?
• you can focus on self-love and self-care even when you’re stuck with people?

Now you’re stuck with my other photos from yesterday.

I don’t mind being stuck with my husband Michael, who sticks healthy and delicious meals on our plates.

I also don’t mind being stuck in traffic listening to Bernadette Peters singing “Some People” from Gypsy:

Now I’m hoping some people stick some comments, below, about this “People You’re Stuck With” post.

Thanks for sticking with me, people, through so much!

Day 2561: Fabulous people

Even though I’ve met so many fabulous people in my life (and please see every one of my previous blog posts for fabulous proof of this), I’ve never written a post with the title “Fabulous people” before.

Why that fabulous title on this fabulous day?

Last night, I met a fabulous person at a fabulous The Great Gatsby/Roaring Twenties-themed birthday party planned by my fabulous niece Laura for her fabulous daughter, Victoria. I told that fabulous person  that my blog featured fabulous people and that “Fabulous people” would probably be the name of today’s post.

Here’s that fabulous person, pictured with fabulous host Laura and then with her  fabulous husband:

She told me that she thought that “The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally” was a fabulous name for a blog. It would be so fabulous if she reads this!

Another fabulous person in today’s blog is Widad, who is my fabulous son Aaron’s fabulous girlfriend and who is also a fabulous artist.

Also pictured above is my long-time, fabulous friend Ada. She and her fabulous husband Johnny brought over a fabulous wedding cake for me and my fabulous husband Michael yesterday.

Johnny, who did not want his picture taken, kept telling me that he thought my hair looked fabulous.

I’ve got more fabulous fotos of fabulous people from yesterday. Are you ready, my fabulous readers?

My fabulous niece Laura made the fabulous food in the foto directly above.  And doesn’t fabulous birthday girl Victoria ….

… look FABULOUS?!!

Last night, I kept asking people where they got their fabulous outfits and I kept hearing this fabulous answer: “Amazon!”

I think it’s fabulous that one fabulous person was dressed as the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock in The Great Gatsby .

I also think that fabulous blogger (and fabulous reader of this blog) Christopher Waldrop will especially appreciate that fabulous Great Gatsby reference, which brings me to my last fabulous new foto for today:

Fabulous Christopher has a fabulous story in that fabulous book, which I think is soooo fabulous (and so fabulously deserved).

Is there any fabulous moral for today’s fabulous story?  Maybe just this: Spend as much time with fabulous people as you can in your fabulous life, because life is short (no matter how fabulously long it seems).

Here‘s “Young and Beautiful” by the fabulous Lana Del Rey, from the 2013 movie The Great Gatsby:

I can’t say whether that film is fabulous or not, because I haven’t seen it.

Fabulous thanks to all who help me create all my “fabulous people” posts, including YOU!

Day 2556: New Year’s Eve

For a long time, my New Year’s Eve tradition has been to compile  a list of my personal ten best and worst of the year.

This year’s best includes

• my son Aaron (top of the list for the 22nd year in a row!),
• my 12/27 wedding to Michael,
• my friends,
• my therapy groups (which include sharing and mindfulness exercises),
• blogging,
• the cats, and
• Michael’s cooking.

This year’s worst includes

• the death of close friends,
• how divided my country is and
• all the time I spent on worry and dread.

Do you see any evidence of  my best and worst in these new end-of-year photos?

 

 

 

I also put musician Jacob Collier on my personal best list for 2019 and it’s the best that I’ll be seeing him perform live in 2020!

It’s best to start planning for the best of 2020 and not to worry about a thing.

What’s your personal best and worst of 2019?

The best way for me to end this post is to express gratitude to all  who have supported me through another year of daily blogging, including YOU!

Happy New Year!

Love,

Ann

Day 2555: What is this place?

What is this place?  It’s The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally on WordPress, a place where I started blogging daily seven years ago. It’s a place I try to make special and safe.

It’s a place where I share stories and photos of places I’ve been.

What is this place? It’s a place where

• all creatures are welcome (no matter what they do or say),
• I create things (including  songs about Ferrero Rocher), and
• I share my thoughts and feelings, hoping that also helps you in some way.

This is the place for me to say this: before you step into 2020, be sure to cancel  your subscriptions to other people’s drama and negativity, but please do not cancel your subscription to The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally.

I found “What Is This Place” playing in place on YouTube.

As always, there’s a place for you and your comments here.

What is this place?  It’s a place for gratitude, every day.

Day 2552: We

Over the past seven years, I have written many blog posts with “We” in the title, including:

• Day 26: What we can and cannot change
• Day 103: We don’t have feelings until we’re ready for them
• Day 118: We really don’t know how we affect other people
• Day 130: The more we let go of fear, the better we can connect with each other
• Day 140: We cannot control other people
• Day 284: We never know how we affect other people (The Ta-Da Pose)
• Day 311: Shall we dance?
• Day 349: How We Are Doing
• Day 374: We’re doing the best we can
• Day 622: What we keep
• Day 651: What have we got?
• Day 759: We go on *
• Day 833: We’re all just trying to figure it out
• Day 917: How we touch the ground
• Day 1200: Where do we come from? What are we? Where are we going?
• Day 1220: We Live Here
• Day 1240: Things we don’t know
• Day 1245: What we choose to see
• Day 1314: We decide
• Day 1351: Things We Love
• Day 1458: We’re still alive
• Day 1489: When we wake up in the middle of the night
• Day 1545: We’re exactly where we’re supposed to be
• Day 1620: Why do we exist?
• Day 1638: We accept
• Day 1673: Are we there yet?
• Day 1697: Merrily we roll along
• Day 1734: How do we work together?
• Day 1753: When we die
• Day 1794: Where we will end up
• Day 1801: What’s bothering us? What do we do about it?
• Day 1906: We fear what we can’t control
• Day 1952: We Are One.
• Day 1975: How we make each other feel
• Day 2060: We are in search of greatness
• Day 2097: Will we ever agree on anything again?
• Day 2244: Are we having fun yet?
• Day 2250: What we are trying to tell each other
• Day 2268: What do we value?
• Day 2322: We want to know what you think!
• Day 2408: How many lives do we have?
• Day 2425: Here we go again!!
• Day 2436: What do we want to remember?
• Day 2443: Why should we care?
• Day 2483: What we’re holding
• Day 2488: Who are we?
• Day 2516: That’s the way we roll

Do we agree that I’ve written lots of posts about “We”?

Here’s a short poem titled “We.”

We

by Ann Koplow

“We” is my favorite pronoun.

It’s much better than “I.”

We are taking vows today

Which will last until we die.

Are we ready for my photos from yesterday?

We (Michael and I) love Jane, the realtor who helped us find the home where we are so happy and who sent us a card, flowers,  gingerbread cookies, and cookie-decorating materials yesterday to celebrate our wedding, which is today!

We wish you could all be there to celebrate with us, but we’re told that we can bring only twelve people with us to the civil ceremony.

Here‘s the “We” song I choose for today’s “We” post.

We belong together and I am so grateful for you and for us!

---

* We** are particularly proud of Day 759: We go on.

** We are comfortable, sometimes, using the royal we.

Day 2546: Celebrating with you!

For the past seven years, I’ve celebrated many things with you, including

• birthdays,
• anniversaries,
• my son Aaron,
• my successful heart valve replacement,
• writing and performing original songs,
• serving as President of the Northeastern Society for Group Psychotherapy,
• my therapy groups,
• appearing at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe,
• speaking at my 45th college reunion, and
• the gifts of being present and alive, every day.

Now, I’m celebrating my upcoming marriage to Michael with you!

That celebratory card is from my thoughtful and celebrated co-workers, who celebrated with me yesterday by giving me these cupcakes.

I am celebrating with you that cupcake ring, which I might need on Friday since one of the his-and-hers wedding rings we ordered online IS the wrong size, just as I feared.  I like celebrating  mistakes, but some mistakes can be a shock to the system. If I get the wedding ring resized quickly, I’ll certainly be celebrating that with you!

As usual, I’m celebrating with you many moments from yesterday:

Celebrate good times …come on!

Thousands of people are celebrating with each other on YouTube in the comments for that video, including:

• celebrating because my mother has now been declared as cancer free
• When your crush asks you out
• Passing my exams that I didn’t study for brought me here
• When you write one word for your 200 letter essay
• When the weekend comes along
• IM NOT PREGNANT HELL YEAH!!
• I was inspired to listen to this song because I saved my neighbor’s cat
• Celebrating because my brother got accepted into college
• When they are giving out free food
• When you successfully make up a “when” joke
• I finished the dishes. I freakin finished the DISHES!!
• I WON THE LOTTERY!

Please share what YOU are celebrating with us, in a comment below.

As always, grateful to be celebrating with you,

Ann