Yesterday, on OK day, I figured it would be okay to ask people on Twitter a question related to that — like “what helps you feel okay?” — and I decided to go with a simple yes or no question: “Are you okay?”
While I usually think yes-or-no questions are just okay and not as good as open-ended questions, I went with “are you okay?” probably because I really would have appreciated hearing that question at difficult moments in my life. As a matter of fact, I wrote a blog post many years ago when I was not so okay, citing these “are you okay” lyrics from the song “Smooth Criminal”:
I truly wish people had asked me “Are you okay?” (repeatedly, without taking “yes” for an answer) when I was a brave little girl in the hospital not admitting how scary it was to be experiencing many heart-related surgeries.
And I like hearing “Are you okay?” as an adult, because it tells me that people care enough to ask and hear an honest answer.
Are you okay with this blog post so far and are you okay with these images I want to share with you today?
Are you okay with this video I found on YouTube by searching with “are you okay?”
Are you okay? I really want to know.
Thanks to all who ask and answer the question “are you okay?” — including YOU!
The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally 
Yes, I am, Ann, and thank you for asking.
You’re welcome, my friend.
Knitting helps me feel okay.
Okay!
in all of my years of early childhood training, (cpr, first aid, Heimlich, etc.) the thing we are trained to always ask someone who appears to be in any form of distress, is, “are you okay?” before making a decision on what to do next to help them. for the record, I am okay, and heading on vacation later today with one of my daughters and 2 grandkids.
That sounds much more than okay!
I’m fine, and if anyone ever asked me that question when I wasn’t, I don’t remember it precisely. But someone was always there. Sometimes unexpected someones. Because there were times when I wasn’t. And then my daughter told me, bluntly, one day, “Mom, I’m not okay.” And then she wouldn’t talk about it. It was right before I moved from Seattle to Madison, and it haunted me. I had so much fear for her. And then someone was there for her. She got therapy and a new job helping other people and I think now that she would answer me. So now I always ask her, You okay? Just in case.
Thank you for this very fine comment, Barbara.
I’m okay because Joan bewitched me in a good way!
Okay!
As your experiences show sometimes just asking someone “Are you okay?” can help. I also hope it helps that you reminded me of “Flee On Your Donkey” by Anne Sexton, with a little help from Rimbaud, that ends,
Anne, Anne,
flee on your donkey,
flee this sad hotel,
ride out on some hairy beast,
gallop backward pressing
your buttocks to his withers,
sit to his clumsy gait somehow.
Ride out
any old way you please!
In this place everyone talks to his own mouth.
That’s what it means to be crazy.
Those I loved best died of it—
the fool’s disease.
Your help is much more than okay, my friend.
I think you make a great point. Sometimes just being acknowledged by the question, “are you okay?” helps to diffuse some of the stress. Such a good reminder of the importance!
Thanks for another great comment, Debra.
Sometimes I think it’s comforting to know that someone cares to see if I’m Ok. Whether the question is sincere is another topic. Have a good week-end, Ann
Thank you!