Day 2623: We really don’t know how we affect other people

Two thousand, five hundred, and five days ago (but who’s counting?), I wrote another blog post with the same title as this one.

We really don’t know how we affect other people.

Rhys — the welcoming, perceptive, kind, aware, attentive, versatile, soulful, generous,  and lovable server at Junior’s restaurant in New York City — really didn’t know how he affected me until I published yesterday’s blog post (and today’s!).

I really didn’t know how I affected Rhys until he showed me his instagram account yesterday and asked to get some pictures with me yesterday.

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I really don’t know how I affect other people by sharing thoughts and images here, including these:











I’ve encountered so many people during my experience at this year’s American Group Psychotherapy Association conference. They really don’t know how they affected me, which was profoundly.

Perhaps McCoy Tyner, the incredible jazz pianist who died yesterday, didn’t really know how he affected other people.  Here‘s one of the most affecting pieces of music I’ve ever heard (performed live in Berlin in 1990):

Here‘s the recording of “Fly with the Wind” which has affected me for decades:

Here‘s another incredible piece from the same album:

We really don’t know how we affect other people unless we tell each other. I want to tell you how I grateful I am for all of you, every day.




Categories: group therapy, in memoriam, personal growth, photojournalism | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

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21 thoughts on “Day 2623: We really don’t know how we affect other people

  1. This is often true – positively or negatively

  2. Thanks for your positive lift for me as I start my Saturday, Ann. I so appreciate flying like the wind with you.

  3. Awww! I love this! Hugs to Rhys from the West coast of Canada

  4. Seeing you and Rhys makes me very happy. You don’t just affect each other; your experiences spread outward.
    Seeing positive self-affirming statements from queer people also reminds me of a poster at the university where I work. It’s about personal pronouns and says, “What should I call you?” It’s a simple question that can have a profoundly positive impact.

  5. puella33

    As I get older, and wiser, I too think it’s important to let individuals know how they’re thought of , in a good way of course otherwise, it’s a waste of energy.

  6. Isn’t it sad that it’s often at funerals that it becomes evident how much someone means to so many.

    • That’s why I like to tell people while we still alive, Dawn. Thanks for always affecting me in a positive way!

  7. Wait…I read this again…we have friends in Brooklyn, and I think we went to a Juniors twice while we were visiting them, it was within walking distance of their apartment in Brooklyn….is there a Juniors in Brooklyn?

    • There is definitely a Junior’s in Brookyn, as well as in Times Square. Thanks for another affecting comment.

  8. I try, always, to affect people in only a positive and supportive way. I do not always succeed!

  9. How I affect overs I do not know in a good way I hope

  10. thank you for affecting me in a positive way, each and every day. it always helps to make me a better person, bit my bit.

  11. Pingback: Day 2660: Get Seen, Be Loved | The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally

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