Day 2066: What I’m not saying

What I’m not saying, here and now, includes many things, because I still have laryngitis.

However, I’m returning to work today, where I will do my best to encourage people to share in therapy what they’re not saying elsewhere in their lives.

Here’s a partial list of what I’m not saying:

  • Some people scare me.
  • I sometimes fear other people’s anger as well as my own anger.
  • I miss my son (who is attending University in Edinburgh) and my late friend Michelle.
  • I’m glad to be home.
  • When I’m away from work for vacation, I fear  I’ve forgotten what I need to know to be a good therapist.
  • When I name my fears, they seem more manageable.
  • If I’m confused, I can take a breath and some time to choose the next right thing to do.
  • I used to have recurring dreams of not being able to speak.
  • Communicating effectively is very important to me.
  • I will do my best to say things non-verbally today.

Whenever I put what I’m not saying into words, I feel better. See how it works?

Let’s see what I’m saying and not saying in my photos from yesterday.

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What I’m not saying about that last picture includes this:

  1. I’ve had that little book since I attended Berklee in the summer when I was in high school.
  2. Those notations include the melody line and some chords for my fourth original song, “Shameless Appeals for Applause.”
  3. When I was on a boat in Iceland recently, the man standing next to me was saying that he was proud of his son, who had recently graduated from Berklee.

What I’m not saying includes the fact that in the 1990s, I helped create Berklee College of Music’s recruitment video.  What I’m not saying is that I haven’t figured out a way to share that video here.

I’m not saying which of these “I’m Not Sayin'” performances I like best.

I’m not saying that those are three different songs but I am saying that I found all three on YouTube here, here, and here.

I’m not saying who wrote that song but you can find that out here.

What I’m not saying, until now, includes saying thanks to Gordon Lightfoot, The Replacements, Nico, Oscar, Harley, Berklee, Iceland, all those who are healing the best they can, and — of course! — YOU.

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Categories: personal growth, photojournalism, Psychotherapy | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

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21 thoughts on “Day 2066: What I’m not saying

  1. Naming our fears, sometimes I forget to do that and they gain momentum. Thank you for reminding me of this. I heard you!

  2. Feel better soon Ann 💐

  3. Here’s to getting your speaking voice back, Ann, to trumpet the voice in your heart and soul.

  4. I’m saying I hope you will be able to say much soon

  5. I hope you recover your voice soon, Ann. But I can hear your pretty well from here. Thank you for sharing Gordon Lightfoot. I have loved many of his songs for pretty much my whole life, but I never heard either of these covers until this morning. I enjoyed hearing them

    I’ve got to write something difficult today, and I think I’ll play a version of Girden’s song to remind me to say what I want to say. Thanks!

  6. Marcia Dubreuil

    You had dreams about not being able to speak? A therapist would have a field day!!:)

  7. What I’d like to say is that English proverbs often have wonderful equivalents in other languages. For instance in English the saying “Nothing ventured, nothing gained” is expressed more evocatively in Japan as, “If you do not enter the tiger’s cave you will never catch its cub.”
    Even without a voice I know you continue to dream and dare to enter the tiger’s cave.

  8. Not sure how I would cope with no voice

  9. I have been collecting Gordon Lightfoot LPs since my original purchase in high school–a very, very long time ago. 🙂 His music always says a lot to me! And I’m so impressed that you write original music. What an excellent creative outlet, and I’m sure your music is a wonderful way to express yourself. Who needs constant verbal language–well, a therapist kind of does. 🙂 So I’ll hope your laryngitis is short-lived. But I hope you can continue to cultivate time for your music!

  10. At times it is better to leave some things un-said. Often, more can be revealed from a look than the spoken word.
    -Alan

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