Day 1338: She who hesitates is ____

How would you fill in the blank in today’s title?

She who hesitates is:

  • lost?
  • wise?
  • scared?
  • uncertain?
  • thoughtful?
  • dumb?
  • human?

Do not hesitate to choose a different ending for the sentence “She who hesitates is ____,” based on your own experience with hesitation.

I chose that title today for three reasons. I shall not hesitate to share those reasons with you, here and now.

Reason #1. Last night, despite my hesitation to worry about anything (since worry doesn’t do any good), I was worrying that I might have hesitated too long to have my leaky heart valve replaced at the Mayo Clinic next month.  Cardiologists have not hesitated to tell me that if  I hesitate too long and my heart loses too much  function and resiliency, the heart valve replacement will not help. And I hesitate to admit that I believe that my heart has deteriorated in function over the last few months.

Whenever I have concerns about my heart, I do not hesitate to contact my long-time and trusted cardiologist, Dr. Deeb Salem.  Here’s the email I did not hesitate to write  him before I started writing this post:

Hi Deeb,

I’m looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. I thought I would give you a preview of what I’ll be bringing in to the meeting.
My main topic is going to be my concern that I might have waited too long for the valve surgery. This concern is based on the fact that I just have not been feeling or looking as well lately and particularly that I need the Lasix every once in a while, so I’m obviously having more issues with heart failure.  I’m assuming my BNP will be higher if we test it tomorrow.  I’m also wondering whether I should inform Dr. Warnes about these developments.
I keep thinking about the moment during my consultation with Dr. Warnes in May, when she told me I needed to get a mechanical valve, NOW.  When I asked for an extension until September so I could spend time with my son in Edinburgh before he started college, she paused and thought and said that was okay.  I wonder now whether it was.  I guess I’ll find out, soon enough.
As usual, it helps me to get my thoughts down.  I am sure we’ll have an interesting discussion of this and other topics tomorrow.
All the best,
Ann

Reason #2. Today’s title gives me the opportunity to share a joke I made up several decades ago, which I did not hesitate to deliver to live audiences during my two open-mic stand-up comedy appearances in the 1980s:

I’m sure you’ve all heard of “Light” beer, which has less calories and alcohol than regular beer.  I’ve invented a new product —  “Fat Beer.”  It has four times the calories and alcohol content as regular beer.  I’ve even got a marketing slogan for it: “He who has a taste is sloshed.”

Reason #3. As usual, I shall not hesitate to use whatever  blog post title I’ve chosen as an excuse to share whatever photos I did not hesitate to take the day before.

Let’s not hesitate to look at those five photos, shall we?

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IMG_4832

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Because I never hesitate to share a tune by Stephen Sondheim, here‘s his brilliant exploration of hesitation in “Now, Later, Soon” from A Little Night Music:

 

Any hesitation about leaving a comment?

In closing,  I shall not hesitate to thank all who helped me create today’s post and you — of course! — for not hesitating to visit this blog, today.

Categories: personal growth | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

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21 thoughts on “Day 1338: She who hesitates is ____

  1. I would say Human, Ann. I find it understandable, that you wished to enjoy time with your son first.
    Good luck 🙂

  2. jwoodruf2015

    All will be well…

  3. I do hope Deeb can reassure you. As far as completing the title is concerned, how about ‘..er…’?

  4. I tend to label most adjectives and labels as “human.” Too many negative labels and you doom yourself. We all hesitate to take care of ourselves, even when we know what the problem was. I was like that with my cancer. But you can’t change what already has passed. Change today and tomorrow. And I don’t hesitate to tell you you are the BEST! All will work out!!

  5. Is hesitating any different from procrastinating? A few days ago I heard part of a TED talk about the value of procrastinating and how we can benefit from slowing down. Too much slowing, though, can be just as bad as too little. Balance is elusive but necessary.
    And I love the “fat beer” joke. I love that I missed the full impact of the slogan at first because I read too quickly; once I slowed down and read as though I were speaking I laughed out loud.
    I am putting off listening to the Sondheim song until I finish this comment. It deserves my full attention.
    However I did not hesitate to hope for good news from Dr. Salem or for good test results or that you will soon feel better. And I’ll continue hoping your surgery goes well.

    • I shall not hesitate to tell you, Chris, how much I appreciated your beautifully balanced comment. I also shall not procrastinate sharing the email Dr. Salem sent back in response to mine, without much hesitation: “We will thoroughly discuss but I feel that you will be fine.” When I received that, I hesitated, slowed down, and felt a bit better.

  6. That is a real concern, Ann. Definitely merits some middle of the night worrying.

    I am not a doctor, but I observe that you went overseas and were able to see many plays and sights with your son. I hope that is a sign that your heart is in good shape for the surgery and that the issues you have been having indicate that it is not too late but also not too soon.

    And my answer: She who hesitates is in vacation. As I am.

    • Your comment definitely merits some middle of the evening appreciation, Maureen. I hope you are enjoying your vacation. ❤

  7. Hmmm…My first thought was … wise. Second thought was…thinking. I think you’re thinking and exploring. I love the fat beer joke. I hope Dr. D. gives you some good answers.

  8. He who hesitates may miss the ship, the plane or the train, he who rushes in may board the wrong train can’t board the wrong ship or plane but train yeah that can happen

  9. Pingback: Day 1339: What’s missing? | The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally

  10. Ann, I have no hesitation In saying that you are here!! Your heart has brought you this far and will take you onwards to healing and recovery.
    Fear and hesitation go hand in hand with where you are. I like the idea of not hesitating as a way to confound fear! Just look both ways before crossing the road though 💕

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