“No judgment” is …
- a goal of this almost-three-year-old daily blog,
- something people say a lot in my therapy groups,
- a state of mind very difficult to maintain,
- particularly important during times of new challenges and transition,
- hereby making its first appearance as a post title, and
- two words I saw in a store, last night.
Do you agree that “No judgment” should be the only one real rule to any game? What’s your judgment about that? Is having no judgment even a possibility for us human beings? Is it something we should strive for?
Would you have no judgment if I asked you to judge the photos in this allegedly no-judgment post?
Personally, as the end of 2015 approaches, I would like to strive for no judgment about:
- what I have or have not done in the past,
- my capabilities, as I try my best in many different arenas, and
- Christmas monkeys and other puzzlements.
No judgment from me about any thought, feeling, or judgment you leave in a comment, here and now.
No judgment, but yes gratitude, for another day of life.
The Year(s) of Living Non-Judgmentally 
Please do not judge me because maybe I am missing the point, but does “no judgement” mean that everything is relative?…no absolutes? Does it mean that if someone kills another person during the commission of a crime that they should not be judged? (and I do not mean in the legal sense of the word) I have made some “significantly bad decisions”, and I feel my entire life should not be judged by those instances over a decade ago. At the same time however, it was my being judged that moved me to accept the responsibility and try to make amends for my actions. So, since I just sort of contradicted myself, I’ll leave it at “Thanks for not judging my train of thought this morning”.
I have this judgment: I enthusiastically and eagerly welcome everything in your comment, Ray. I don’t think you are missing the point. I think “no judgment” is a goal that we naturally-judging human beings could strive for, with good results. (That previous sentence is a judgment, too!) While we have to make judgments in this world in order to survive, striving for a “no judgment” stance helps us appreciate each moment, forgive ourselves and others, heal, grow, and move on. This judgment of mine is based on years of observing myself and others.
No judgement on that reply. I get it.
Interesting questions Ann! I wrote a series of posts about the 4 generations of women in my family. I wanted to write them without judgement and the only way I managed that was by writing them in the third person. I think we use judgment every day in making decisions. I think I am always making judgments, sizing people up, etc., but I choose not to hold it against them or pronounce judgment so to speak when it’s not favourable. Make sense? ❤
Diana xo
My judgment is that you ALWAYS make sense, Diana. xxoo ❤
haha thanks!
oh judgement- we strive not to let it enter our consciousness, but it does seem to creep in. I try hard not to make judgments, pass judgment, and have learned not to care if others who don’t know me are are making judgments about me. I try to always give the benefit of the doubt, hard as it may be.
It’s very easy to give you the benefit of the doubt, Lisa, because of wise comments like this one. ❤
thank you Ann ❤
Such a wonderful, worthy goal — so hard to live everyday! And even in writing ‘hard’ I am making a judgement. It is what it is. A goal I strive to live everyday. One I get to keep practicing and working on achieving!
And when I slip, I say quietly to myself. Bless them. Forgive me. 🙂
No judgements here Ann. Just great appreciation for the light you always shine to create more love, laughter, joy and peace in the world.
No judgments, Louise, just this: ❤
Know what I think is cool — is that here I sit at the foot of the Rockies on the north side of the 49th parallel, and there you sit at the edge of the Atlantic, on the southern side of the same parallel, and we are reading and commenting through the invisible web of cyberland threading our worlds together.
Now that’s cool and there’s no judgement there!
Cooler than cool, Louise!
What would Christmas be without the Chrismas Monkey! xo j
Exactly! xxoo a
Judgement also exists in the animal kingdom. Apes for example have hierarchies, and some adults members are sometimes cast away if they don’t complete rituals they have as a group or if they do not compete successfully during mating or follow the rules of the group (such as caring for the young or stealing food). These are also judgements and it shows that they come as rules of conduct for binding societies together. Nevertheless, they are temporary.
Recently, a well known philosopher died, his name was Rene Girard. Girard’s fundamental ideas, which provided the foundation for his thinking, was that desire is “mimetic” (all of our desires are borrowed from other people), that all conflict originates in mimetic desire (mimetic rivalry), that the ‘scapegoat mechanism’ is the origin of sacrifice and the foundation of human culture. So he ‘rationalized’ the desire that societies have for “blaming” others. Once society has found a “guilty” being, the “scapegoat” mechanism begins, be it time in jail or death penalty. “Relief” is then obtained because there has been a judgement, ‘justice’ has been done.
Nevertheless, in John 8:7 from the Bible, Jesus speaks:
“So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.” I like Jesus, but religions don’t help with “judgement day”, or with “washing sins away” with redemption. Everyone I think is responsible for what they do, so religion is not for curing sins. ‘Judgement’ has been created by society to keep misconduct at bay, but in the end, the real judge is oneself.
Some say humankind is alone, others don’t. Humans struggle with spirituality and religion in a vicious manner, claiming ‘promised lands’. The toughest lesson in life, “all that glitters is not gold” is pounding at the door. Buddhism says, life’s an illusion, and there are only “skillful and unskillful decisions”. Happiness is momentary. Everything else must run its course the way nature intended.
I’m glad your comment ran its course exactly the way it did, Maria. ❤
I thought it was too long though
No judgment about the length.
What Val just said is the other meaning ‘judgement’ has, it is a ‘skill’ which is assessed by many healthcare professionals. ‘Judgement’ is the capacity to distinguish what is a safe from an unsafe situation. It is a skill for ‘self-preservation’ and is crucial to assess in children, elderly, and people at risk for mental and nervous disorders. Now I realize I was bit pessimistic. Oh well.😞 Sorry if I hurt anyone’s sensibilities.
In my judgment, I can’t imagine that you hurt anyone’s sensibilities, Maria. Thanks for this skillful comment.
Sometimes I give the impression I’m an atheist, but I’m really a Pantheist and Buddhist.
No judgment and many thanks, Maria!
Interesting thought processes Ann. It is said never to judge a book by its cover, and then again to take things at face value. I try to keep an open mind
I love open minds! Thanks for sharing your thought process here.
I judge this blog one of the best I ever read! Love your writing and your photos, Ann! Thanks for everything.
I judge you a fabulous reader, Sunny!
Judgement comes with our evolved brain. We call it discernment, and it works because we discern when the cook top is hot, when the traffic turns red and when our partner needs a hug. Judgment that has a negative impact on others is a completely different matter.
I judge this blog to be full of goodness. ( Like Sonnische 🙂
The key is to be aware of our analysis and conclusions and they impact they could have.
With awareness we can ask – Does this judgment come from an open loving heart or a closed contracted fearful one….
Thank you, Val, for this evolved and discerning comment. ❤
I only weigh fish but it’s still a judgement.
I am weighing my response to that photo, which mostly involves laughter. Thanks, Grumpy and Maria!
Maybe it’s a cliché, but I may judge actions but not people. In my judgement you have engaged a lot of people on your blog, Ann
My next action is let you know that your judgment means a lot to me, Derrick.
My judgment says someone better pick up that tree! The poor thing!
It is also my judgment that chocolate is good. 😀
I can relate to your sweet judgments! ❤
Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
LET’S PLAY…!?!
Thanks, Jonathan!
I like those Lindt chocolates and the quote about Kindness, Ann. The words, “No judgment,” to me may be too general, but it’s intent seems positive.
Hope you have a wonderful and memorable Christmas, Ann. I have been saying, “Follow the Star ☆ . . .”
Thanks for following your star here, Robin!
Reblogged this on Ancien Hippie.
In my judgment, being reblogged is quite the compliment.