My high school Chemistry teacher, Mrs. O’Keefe, would often say to me, in class, “Ann, are you confused?” And I would reply, “No, this is my natural expression.”
Actually, no matter what the intention of my snappy answer to Mrs. O’Keefe, I think I often do look confused, befuddled, baffled, nonplussed, and otherwise mixed up.
I ASSUME I look that way. As I’ve written here, we really don’t know what we look like, to the outside world.
However, I’m guessing that I can look quite confused, befuddled, baffled, nonplussed, and otherwise mixed up because … that’s how I’m feeling. I felt that way in Chemistry Class, for sure, and even now, I can look around me, and be mixed up by what I see.
Speaking of mixed up, I often notice anagrams — which mix up letters — when I look at words.
For example, I noticed some anagrams yesterday morning, while I was preparing breakfast.
See? “Chai” (the flavoring for my oatmeal) and “Chia” both use the same four letters, mixed up.
I mention this, not just to (1) brag about my ability to see anagrams and (2) brag about how healthy my breakfast was yesterday, but also as an excuse to share another Michael Brecker tune — Anagram — which I was happy to hear yesterday, on one of my to and fro walks, near work.
Oh no! I can’t find a video of Michael Brecker’s Anagram, anywhere! Now, I’m befuddled and confused about how to proceed with this post. I mean, the whole premise of the last few paragraphs has fallen apart! What to do?
Well, I COULD show you, instead, this “doctoral recital performance” of Anagram, found here at YouTube):
I am a little mixed up, now, by the concept of a “doctoral recital performance.” I guess that means that somebody involved in that YouTube performance was actually earning a doctorate! That sounds quite classy, to me.
I was going to say “PhD” instead of “doctorate” in that previous paragraph, but PhD would mean a doctorate in Philosophy, so I’m obviously … mixed up. What would a Musical Doctorate be called? It must be …
No, wait. That’s another kind of doctor.
Anyway, here are more mixed up thoughts, from me, about a Musical Doctorate (however it’s abbreviated). Even though I went to school for jazz piano at Berklee for two summers (soon after Mrs. O’Keefe was telling me how confused I looked), it never occurred to me, before today, that somebody could earn a doctorate with a musical performance.
Maybe, if I ever get brave enough to do some open mic singing that’s at a doctoral level of excellence … you’ll have to start calling me Doctor Koplow! I would definitely be nonplussed, by that.
Actually, sometimes when people call my number at work to make psychotherapy appointments, they call me Dr. Koplow. I guess they get confused, befuddled, etc. because I work within the primary care practice, where most of the treaters are MD’s and called “Doctor” (of course). (I always correct them as soon as I can, and invite them to call me “Ann.”)
Hmmm. Have I succeeded in confusing, baffling, nonplussing, or otherwise mixing up my readers, in this post?
If not, maybe I should try harder. It’s lonely to feel this confused, all by myself!
This might mix people up: When I was googling the internet for Anagram, by Michael Brecker, I saw this entry:
Michael Brecker – Anagram Lyrics | MetroLyrics
Lyrics to ‘Anagram’ by Michael Brecker. … “Anagram” is track #3 on the album Pilgrimage.
“There are LYRICS to THAT song?” I thought. “I’m confused!”
However, I was also intrigued.
That’s the other side of confusion, isn’t it? When something is new, different and/or unexpected, we might be baffled and bewildered, but we can be intrigued and interested, too.
Intrigued and interested, I just went to the MetroLyrics site (a place that sounds quite classy, to me), to discover what the Anagram lyrics might be.
Drat! That was a dead end.
These lyrics haven’t been entered yet. Please add them for us, if you know them.
I can’t add the lyrics, MetroLyrics! I DON’T KNOW THEM! I went to that site because I thought YOU knew something I didn’t.
No wonder I’m so confused, with all this baiting and switching going on, everywhere.
If you are baffled or befuddled by the phrase “bait and switch,” let’s see if I can clear that up, now.
Ooops! I’m so sorry, my dear readers. There’s been another mix up. I can’t find a good-enough definition of “bait and switch,” with the time I have today. The Urban Dictionary (does that sound classy, to you?) is the best I can do:
Bait and Switch
The policy used by Bell Mobility to get more money out of their customers. They will *bait* you in with offers of really good stuff, then switch the offers around behind your back, often with the excuse of “that was just a promotion” or “you must have changed it yourself”
Bell: We’ll give you this really good plan.
You: I’ll take it.
*bill arrives without the really good plan*
Yikes! Is everybody confused?
Good! Now I don’t feel so alone.
I have to say, I do feel considerably better when others are having a similar experience to me.
That’s what I witness in group therapy (like I did, yesterday, and I will, today, too).
However, confusion can be uncomfortable. Therefore, I will try to compensate for any befuddlement, confusion, bafflement, and mixed-up-ed-ness I may have caused you, today, by showing you more mixed-up photos I took, yesterday.
That’s something I found in my recently retrieved stash of nostalgic treasures (letters, cards, and other gifts from people in my life when I was young). Somebody gave me that book while I was in the hospital around age 10, dealing with a congenitally mixed-up heart.
I absolutely intended to include the photo of that book in yesterday’s post, called “The Dark.” However, I was too distracted, confused, and befuddled to do so. Why? Because while I was composing yesterday’s post, I was also getting myself and my son, Aaron, ready to go to his doctor’s office, because Aaron hasn’t been feeling well lately.
Here’s what I want to say, at this point: (1) It’s nothing serious (Aaron’s diagnosis was seasonal allergies) and (2) yesterday’s post was good enough without that photo.
I found this misplaced piece of greenery, yesterday, as Aaron and I were getting ready to leave for his doctor’s appointment. Obviously, somebody was confused, befuddled, and mixed up at that point. Would you care to guess who that was?
I drove Aaron to his doctor’s office, in nearby Somerville.
That’s Frank, who was also in the doctor’s waiting room, yesterday morning. I was — for just a moment — confused when Frank suddenly started talking to us, showing us YouTube videos of bulldogs, including one where a bulldog was jumping on a trampoline! Perhaps Frank had us mixed up with dog people. I definitely appreciated the distraction and Frank’s friendliness.
More photos from the doctor’s waiting room:
As I confessed to Aaron yesterday, sometimes I take photos to relieve anxiety. That helps center me, when I’m feeling mixed up. And not to mix things up here, with too many details (too late!), Aaron preferred to go into his appointment alone, so I had some time on my hands, in the waiting room.
After Aaron’s appointment, when I was feeling considerably relieved, I stopped to take this photo:
I told Aaron (who sometimes gets impatient when I take pictures for this blog), “I’m taking this photo because I really like it. I think that mixed-up combination of a tax accounting place and an astrologer is funny!”
After I took Aaron back home, I proceeded to work, and saw this:
I don’t know about you, but I found that confusing. Then, I saw this:
I was mixed up by that, also. Does that sign mean a Fenway Park tour is starting in 15 minutes or that the tour lasts 15 minutes? It’s probably the former meaning, but who knows? Maybe because the Red Sox are out of the pennant race this year, people aren’t that interested in hearing details about them, right now.
A few minutes later, I saw this:
Again, I was confused and befuddled. Where were those working people?
Well, it’s time for me to end this post. My son, who still feels lousy — but well enough to go to school — just left for the day, and I’ve got to get ready for work.
Not to further confuse things, but I do need to ask myself this: what feels left unsaid for me, here and now?
Just this. You may have noticed that — despite my elaborate set-up regarding “Anagrams” — there were no more (conscious) anagrams in this post. Or, you may NOT have noticed that. However, I noticed it, and I was thinking
To make this post complete, I need to end with an anagram.
But I guess anagrams are not that easy for me to see. Darn it!
Then, I remembered a card, from my nostalgic stash that I may — or may not — have already included in this blog. (I’m still mixed up, aren’t I?)
While that isn’t a typical anagram, it works for me.
Thanks to my son, to my father, to mixed up people everywhere, and to you — of course! — for mixing it up with me here, today.