Day 384: Anything you know about what may have contributed to where you are in the moment

That sure is a long-winded title, isn’t it?

Anything you know about what may have contributed to where you are in the moment.

My first attempts at communicating thoughts are often laborious and klutzy, just like that. Usually, if I have time to improve what I’ve written, I will:

  1. Re-read it, imagining I’ve never seen it before and that I’m easily confused. 1
  2. Omit needless words. 2

However, while I do have some extra time to compose my post today (since it’s the weekend), I am NOT going to rewrite that title.

Why?  (She imagines readers scattered throughout the world, crying out.)

Because that title phrase is something I say in every therapy group I run.

Why? (She imagines readers scattered throughout the world saying, without assuming their tone of voice.)

I guess some context would help, at this point.

In the therapy groups I facilitate each week, I invite people to check in. I do that by expressing what I’m curious about, which includes:

  • “Where you are in the moment.”
  • “Anything you know about what may have contributed to where you are in the moment.”

And while I vary the language of that first part (I may say, “What’s going on for you in the moment?” or I may include words like “thoughts, feelings, anything”) … I say the second part the same way, every time.

Hmmmmm. As usual, now that I’ve written something down, I see how I can improve it. From now on, I shall try saying, “Anything you know about that.” Period.

Already, I’ve gotten something out of this blog post.  I’m going to keep writing, though, because I think I have more to learn here, this morning.

I chose that title for my blog post today because I want to be more mindful, right now, of where I am. And those check-in questions help me, too.

Okay!

Where you are in the moment … ?

See, I’m much more of a smart aleck than the people who attend my groups. My first impulse is to say, “In Boston.” Or “Sitting in this room.”  But nobody in my groups ever says things like that. (Maybe they’re tempted, too.)

I’ll ask myself that question, again.

Hungry.

(pause)

Eating a banana. A little uncomfortable.

(pause)

Sitting on a sofa. Looking out the window.  Realizing it’s snowing. Wondering about meeting my friend, Deb, for brunch.

(pause)

Realizing that brunch is still happening.

Feeling better. Letting go of anxiety. Grateful to be writing. Grateful to be here.

Next question:

Anything you know about what may have contributed to where you are in the moment … ?

(I know, I know, but — for me — that long version works best.)

Eating something.

Changing my physical position to something more comfortable.

Naming my anxiety.

Contacting my friend, Deb, to check about our plans. Discovering she was not afraid of venturing out in the snow. Knowing, based on past experiences, that I will be safe enough driving to meet her.

Feeling safe enough about expressing my thoughts, here, and sharing them online.

Remembering that, two days ago, a group psychotherapy organization I’ve admired for years invited me to be on their board of directors. Being surprised and flattered by that. Realizing I could say “no,” if I chose.

Saying “yes.”

Okay! It’s time for me to prepare for my adventure today, in the snow, with my friend Deb.

Wait!  Did I forget anything?

(pause)

IMG_2568

Yes.  Drinking some water.

Thanks for reading, no matter where you are, in the moment.


  1.  Advice I frequently gave while teaching a class at Boston University, where I attended a graduate film program in the 80’s. I often added, “I don’t have to imagine being easily confused.”

  2. I thought this was Rule #1 in Strunk and White’s Elements of Style.3 It’s not. It’s Rule # 13.

  3. Rule #1 in Strunk and White is something quite passé: “Form the possessive singular of nouns with ‘s. Follow this rule whatever the final consonant.” These days, whenever I write something like “Charles’s friend,” I feel like a freak.

Categories: personal growth | Tags: , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

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24 thoughts on “Day 384: Anything you know about what may have contributed to where you are in the moment

  1. I’m waiting to go for brunch with my extended family. We just celebrated my sister’s wedding and it turned into a bit of a family reunion as well. One last meal before we all head off in different directions again.

  2. Rivera

    All (I’m affraid) I know about has contributed to where I am today..!!
    “I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.” Blaise Pascal
    PS… Enjoy your brunch… 🙂

  3. Thanks for sharing your thoughts today and allowing us to see the process of setting the moment in your group work. Understanding is the key, and rooting out the reasons for our thoughts and actions puts them in perspective. Elements of Style is required reading for my students. When I was English department chair at a high school years ago, I made buying the book mandatory. It was also on my required book list for my college students. Hope you had a lovely brunch.

    • I did have a lovely brunch and I very much enjoyed all the tasty parts of this lovely comment. Thanks so much for this visit.

  4. Thank you for reminding me of the importance of Strunk and White’s writing guidebook. “Elements in Style,” assigned in college, close by on the shelf of my newsroom cubby. Next to the AP Stylebook, in fact. Anyway, Ann, although today’s title is a mouthful, I get it. In fact, I can imagine it being the title of a Bob Dylan song, followed by simple verses. He works like that, and so do you!

  5. findingmyinnercourage

    So happy you had a lovely brunch. Thanks for sharing your thoughts today! I really enjoyed your Blog today!

  6. I might borrow your phrase of “where you are in the moment” i can see it working in work team meetings as well, especially non profits

  7. I’m sitting at my computer, happy that I finally talked myself into getting a glass of water. I feel like I need a shower and my feet are cold.

    I should put the socks back on my feet that are balled up on the floor below my table and then make my way to the wonder that is my upstairs shower.

  8. I am really interested in learning more about being in the moment. Thanks for the follow! Gail

    • You are most welcome, Gail. I’m always interested in learning more about that, too. Thanks so much for visiting and commenting.

  9. I love your stream of consciousness post today. In this moment I’m trying to be fully present in writing this note (tying, but not succeeding – my mind keeps drifting off to what I’m gonna make for dinner – hehe). Have a lovely week! Celeste 🙂

    • I’m so glad you loved this post. I try to be as present as possible, but my mind keeps drifting off, too. Right now, I’m thinking about your dinner and mine, also. All your lovely wishes back at you, Celeste.

  10. Hi Ann,
    So far I’ve seen two cats and one hamster. Do you have more furry flat mates?

  11. Delightful. The cute pic is the cherry on top.

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