Yesterday, I witnessed somebody I love very much, experiencing a primal, human feeling.
He was expecting other people to show up and, for a while, it looked like nobody was coming. Nobody.
He was trying to make meaning of that.
But what I saw, most of all, was pain.
I tried to provide, as I do with anybody in pain, witness to the hurt and — when appropriate — inviting room for the hope. The hope that people would come, eventually. The possibility that the abandonment, while painful, was temporary.
And the abandonment was temporary.
Carol Pearson, in this book …
writes about 12 archetypes — primal human roles we go through on our journey through life.
The first archetype is the The Innocent. That is how we enter the world.
The second archetype is The Orphan. Into every Innocent’s life, disappointment will come. Abandonment, of some form.
Orphans feel helpless, powerless, confused. They try to make meaning of this new perspective on life, but the new feelings of loss and pain are … overwhelming.
The world is not as safe as they thought.
We all feel orphaned, at some time or other. We think:
Nobody is coming. Nobody cares. I am alone in this.
This is what we cannot see, when we feel orphaned: The people who are around us.
Maybe they don’t know about our pain.
Maybe they are on their way.
That’s what I witnessed yesterday, with somebody I love.
I know that feeling of being orphaned. Abandoned.
I still feel it, at times, today.
This post is a reminder for me and other orphans, of all kinds.
I may feel alone, in pain. But, truly, I am not.
Okay! Time for a Google Image, for “archetype orphan.”
And here it is.
When you’re feeling abandoned, people are there, even if you cannot see them. In the meantime:
Thanks to the Buddha, Carol Pearson, orphans everywhere, and to you — especially — for visiting today.