Way back on Day 3 of this blog, I wrote this post about the fear of feeling too good.
And, at the end of the post, I said I would write more the next day.
And then, I didn’t.
And that was useful, because I got to manage my guilt about making a promise and breaking it to you, my readers.
And I haven’t returned to the topic.
Today’s the day!
And something that I’ve relearned — again! — is to have faith in my own process. Or, as I wrote a few days ago, in this post:
#17. Notice your resistance, letting go of judgment.
If you’re resisting doing something, assume that — on some level — that resistance makes sense. See if you can figure that out. Even if you can’t, try to let go of judgment about the resistance.
Also resistance may mean that you don’t yet have what you need (data, support, completing something else first) in order to continue with your task.
I’m not going to write today about why I was resisting completing that task — of writing Part 2 of “The Fear of Feeling ‘Too Good,” even though that might be useful to explore. That might be the post for another day.
Here’s what I want to say today about The Fear of Feeling ‘Too Good.”
At times in my life, I’m been afraid of feeling too good, because:
- I’m afraid that I will be disappointed.
- Other people in my life have been afraid of my feeling too good, for their own reasons (which I can only guess).
- I’m afraid that if I feel too good, I will lose people.
I think those are the main punchlines, this morning.
I have a big day at work today, where I’m meeting with somebody where it will probably be helpful for me to feel very good about myself (even though I still believe there are some dangers in my feeling “too good.”)
Writing this post this morning helped me prepare for the meeting, which I’m actually looking forward to.
Before I leave, though, I would like to quote this poem by Marianne Williamson, which I have found very helpful. (If it helps you to do so, feel free to substitute your own language for the word “God.”)
Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
Thanks for reading.
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Is what you are talking about the same as me. I am scared of being let down terribly and left wondering why I could have felt that good. I guess it is fear of unforeseen dissaster looming, too scared to feel good.